Trump vs the Bad Boy Image

Dramatis Personae: President Trump – (PT); Vice President Pence – (VPP); Robert Mueller – (RM); Chuck Schumer – (CS), Melania Trump – (MT)

Scene 1 – White House Oval Office 8am Monday, President Trump is standing at the doorway shouting in his typical way.

 

PT – Mike. Mike, Mike!  Pence, where the hell are you?

VPP – Right here Mr. President! Now, how can I be of assistance?

PT – Mike, have you seen my popularity numbers? They’re through the roof.

VPP – Well, Rasmussen says you are up 5 points to 50%.

PT – Exactly. Don’t you see what this means?  They loved the porn star thing.  I’ve got to do something to capitalize on this.

VPP – Sir, didn’t that working over the First Lady gave your face and other areas suffice to deter you from any further extra-marital activities?

PT – Relax, Holy Roller, I’m not talking about the skirts. I mean real fun.  Don’t you see?  This 5% must be men all over America who never have a bit of fun.  They’re living vicariously through me.  Whenever I do something that they wish they could do but can’t, they get a kick out of it and like me even better.  So all I have to do is have a little fun and my poll numbers will be stratospheric.

VPP – And you don’t see how this can go wrong?

PT – Exactly.

VPP – Very well, I’ll call the legal team in today and have them start working up the cover stories.

PT – That’s the spirit little guy. Well, I’m off to give Chuck Schumer a hot foot.

VPP – God speed Mr. President, God speed.

 

Scene 2 – Same week; Up flash a series of whirling headlines on fake newspaper front pages; “Trump puts whoopee cushion under Pope,” “Trump teepees Jerry Brown’s Earth Day Observance,” Trump gives Shia LeBeof an atomic wedgey,” “Trump suspected of giving Robert DeNiro double noogies and a severe Indian Burn.”

 

Scene 3 – Inside Chuck Schumer’s Senate Minority Leader’s Office – Schumer behind his desk and Robert Mueller standing above him looking tall, grave and thin.

 

CS – I tell you Mueller you’ve got to put a stop to this reign of terror that Trump is inflicting on us. Nancy Pelosi would be inconsolable if she weren’t already completely incoherent.

RM – Mr. Senate Minority Leader Schumer, what can I do? None of these offenses in and of itself rises to the level of treason.   Only the House can bring impeachment charges up and the republicans, as gutless as they are, won’t do it because they’re more afraid of getting a swirlee from Trump than even of getting voted out.

CS – Well, I simply can’t take this anymore (beginning to tear up and sniffle), it’s too much.

RM – Please Mr. Senate Minority Leader Schumer, pull yourself together. I’ll do what I can.

CS – (sniff, sniff) Thanks Bob.

 

Scene 4 – White House Oval Office 8am Thursday, President Trump is leaning on his desk smiling and talking to the Vice President.

 

PT – Yeah Mike, my poll numbers are hovering in the low nineties. Even the Democrats are loving this stuff.  Look  (holding up some underwear) Maureen Dowd even sent me her laudary.

VPP – Oh, Mr. President, now really!

PT – Relax, Aunt Amelia, I had them steam cleaned and checked for polonium.

VPP – But where will this all end, sir?

PT – Who cares? I’m thinking of having the CIA kidnap Kim Jong-un, shave his head and paint it blue and tie him up naked inside the girl’s locker room.  And next week me and Putin are gonna steal Trudeau’s lunch money and tell him to stop hitting himself.

(just then the phone rings, President Trump puts it on speaker)

PT – Trump here, go!

MT – (her voice coming over the speaker) Schmoopey, what have you been up to this week?

PT – Nothing Schmoopey, I swear! That Dowd skank sent that laundry over to set me up, I swear!

MT – No Schmoopey, I don’t mean the Dowd panties. Those are not your fault.  I mean why have you been mean to the other children?  Crying Chuck’s Mom was over and she was very sad.  She said you were mean to her little boy and she wants you to stop.  And all the other moms called up and said the same thing.

PT – Schmoopey, you don’t understand. The world is a vicious horrible place where only the strong survive.  It’s kill or be killed.

MT – Well if you’re not going to play nice with the other kids then you’re not getting a story tonight.

PT – Oh, sure they tell on me and I get in trouble. You don’t think Cryin’ Chuck does bad stuff?  And what about Crooked Hillary and Dirty Bill?  Why don’t they get in trouble?

MT – Because they’re not my Schmoopey and they don’t get the best stories in the world.

PT – Fine I’ll stop. But ya know, now I probably will fall into the fifties in the polls again.  And the democrats will win the mid-terms.

MT – No they won’t. You are the best President Schmoopey.  You know you will win anyway.  Just play nice.

PT – Okay fine. Now that you’ve embarrassed me in front of Mike can I go?

MT – Oh, hi Michael Pence I did not know that you were there.

VPP – That’s okay Mrs. Trump, always a pleasure.

MT – Goodbye Mike, goodbye Schmoopey. (hangs up).

PT – Alright Mike. I guess back to the drawing board.  How about we just abolish the IRS?

Scenes from a Holy Saturday Dinner

My extended family has recently taken to getting together on both Saturday and Sunday of Easter weekend.  So last night I was over a sibling’s house for round one.  Amazing food and drink was everywhere and everyone was talkative.  Winter was evaporating and spring was in everyone’s blood.  What a perfect time to talk politics.

We’re more than a year into the Trumpian Era and clear progress into a new world is evident all around.  At the gathering yesterday of family and some friends a different perspective on what can be said and what was common knowledge was apparent.  Those who had formerly been frightened or confused had gotten used to the new normal.  Deference to the neo-con and NeverTrump “orthodoxy” had melted away.  Contempt for the politically correct was loudly declared and anger at the left was sulfurous.  Many were obviously overjoyed at the ability of Trump to confound his enemies and were openly scornful of the dangers of the Stormy Daniels scandal to damage the President’s agenda or presidency.

One amusing incident was a conversation in which a visiting son of the Cloud People tried to explain why White Privilege was a legitimate concept.  The blowback was heated and quite entertaining.  My own statement was that if someone asks me to check my white privilege my response is “Thanks, I just checked it before and it’s doing splendidly.  How’s yours?”  Discussions abounded on the best way for the Attorney General to arrest the Mayor of Oakland and whether treason was the correct crime to assign to a state official interfering with the duties of a federal immigration enforcement officer.

I was especially gratified that the usual suspects entirely abandoned the attempt to provide the “Narrative.”  We seem to have completely shrugged off the Bush/Obama era of right-wing paralysis.  We can say what we want and we don’t have to care who hears it or what they think about it.

Probably a good part of the change is actually internal to me.  I’ve finally figured out which arguments and which pundits are a waste of time.  I don’t even waste time talking or even thinking about them.  I just deprive them of oxygen and spend my time on what I want to talk about and what I want to happen.  Once in a while we’ll make fun of the neo-cons or the Bushes or Romney.  But that’s strictly for laughs.  We are a very irreverent group.

And I would say the most important change of all is we laughed a lot.  We were happy to be living in a place where there are jobs for our grown kids and even more hope for the future.  And we especially hoped to roll back some of the progressive assaults in the near future.  We talked about the Supreme Court and the Draining of the Swamp.  And we laughed at our insane ridiculous President who beds porn stars one week and tweaks the noses of psychopathic dictators the next.  It’s as if the “Most Interesting Man in the World” were suddenly living in the White House.  And the insanity that circles around him like the rings that surround Saturn are part of the gaudy, nonsensical adventure.  And the roller coaster gee force is no longer frightening, just fun.

23MAR2018 – OCF Update

Well, I’m back in the saddle at work again and catching up here on the site.  I’m halfway through Robert Silverberg’s Lord Valentine’s Castle (hat tip to Tom) and should have the review soon.  And based on the story so far, I think I’ll read the other two books at some point.  I have some movie and tv reviews coming up very soon.  I’ve got over a thousand photos from the Southwest to edit and rate so I should have a few photo posts coming up soon.  The political situation is like some kind of crazy kaleidoscopic nightmare.  It sounds like Ray Bradbury’s formula for his stories, “The trip—exactly one-half exhilaration, exactly one-half terror.”  And now we know just how many women are willing to admit to having sex with Donald Trump.  I guess he was right about them letting him grab them.  But they do seem to have been paid for the experience.  Trump truly believes in capitalism.  Well at least he wasn’t attacking them like Slick Willie.  Either way things seem to be going well.  The Republicans are afraid of losing the House, blah, blah, blah.  Well they are pretty lame so anything is possible.  But they really should embrace populism and try to show some backbone.  It is the smart move.  I still have to read some of the political columns I missed but whether there is something important to share remains to be seen.  From my point of view Trump needs to clean the stables and drain the swamp.  Then he can move onto policy.  And he needs to punish the sanctuary cities and send the illegals home.  And finally, Justice Kennedy, go away, now!

The Raven is a Wicked Bird

“Well the raven is a wicked bird

His wings are black as sin

And he floats outside my prison window

Mocking those within

And he sings to me real low

It’s hell to where you go

For you did murder Kate McCannon”

(Kate McCannon, Colter Wall,  2017)

The Raven is a Wicked Bird

 

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

 

When we got to the Visitor’s Center at the South Rim of the Grand Canyon this fellow was giving me the evil eye from a low hanging perch on a nearby tree.  He was croaking some kind of a challenge at me.  He probably wanted me to acknowledge his suzerainty over the whole South Rim of the Grand Canyon.  These ravens are enormous and don’t caw like crows.  They croak and bellow.  And anything you leave loose in your campsite is fair game.  They’ll steal anything smaller than a duffel bag that’s interesting looking, especially anything shiny or edible.  And just about anything is one or the other from their point of view.  One sat in a tree above our campsite and serenaded us with abuse at sunset and again at sunrise.  All in all, a very impressive creature.  Almost thirty years ago I read a book called “Ravens in Winter” by a guy named Bernd Heinrich.  He was studying ravens in Maine.  He described how intelligent and social the birds were.  I’ve always wanted to see them up close.  Now I’m jealous of those living in the west where they are very common.

Huzzah! I’m Almost Back Home.

So tomorrow is the flight home and tonight I have wifi access.  It was a remarkable trek (for someone as feeble and lazy as myself) and went from Las Vegas to Zion National Park, to Vermilion Cliff National Monument including a side trip into the White Pocket area and then over to the South Rim of the Grand Canyon and finally back to Las Vegas where I took a few shots of Lake Mead and environs.  I almost exclusively used a Voigtlander 10mm f\5.6 lens with the rest being a Sony 55mm f\1.8 for the tighter shots.  Heaven only knows what that’s going to produce but I’m excited to see.  Sorry for this short note but I need to catch up first with what is going on in the big bad world.

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Interregnum

As threatened, I will be away until next Thursday (22MAR) and will have limited (if any) opportunity to post.  But don’t despair.  I will be gathering excellent photographic material and revitalizing my flagging wit.  I hope that in my absence there will be no Trump related nuclear exchanges or Mueller presidential indictments or any other earthshaking events.  Feel free to leave comments on this post to provide me with any topics or things that you think warrant attention.  Or just to say hello.

I shall return!

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11MAR2018 – Current State of Affairs

Here we are, believe it or not, fast approaching the first quarter mile turn on the metaphorical 2018 One Mile Trump Derby Race and Fashion Show.  Currently, the favorite, God-Emperor (1) is ahead of SJW’s Last Hope (13) and JEB’s Your Daddy (17) by at least 8 lengths and his jockey has now reversed his seat and is making funny faces at the rest of the field as they rapidly shrink into the middle-distance.  Abandoning the horse racing metaphor (‘cause I can’t think of anything more), we have CNN and MSNBC praising President Trump’s initiative with North Korea, the President of the Steelworkers’ Union telling Chuck Todd that Trump will get electoral support from the rank and file over his trade stance and NeverTrumper Senator Dean Heller is slobbering over President Trump in the forlorn hope that this will help him win his primary.  Oh baby, the times they are a changin.

And the only real threat on the horizon, Mueller and his Russian witch-hunt, seems to be turning into a case of the besieger becoming the besieged.  I get the impression that the Trump Administration is building a case against Mueller to be used to put some teeth into a tit for tat agreement to end his investigation.

And let’s look at the political environment.  The Media is hanging around porn shoots trying to scare up interest in impeachment.  Congressional Democrats keep insisting that 2018 is their year to win back the House and Senate.  Congressional Republicans are trying to memorize the phrase tax cuts and jobs.  The NeverTrumpers are becoming increasingly lonely and confused.  The Dissident and Alt-Right are becoming so confident that they are almost giddy.  Some of them are toning down parts of their message to broaden their appeal.  Others are actually hardening their responses to leftists in the Social Media and the broader culture.  In general, there is a sense that the tide is turning against the left.  Whether this change is momentary or something that is gaining momentum is still unclear.  But there is definitely a change going on.  Good.

The Left of course is counter-attacking furiously wherever it can.  Facebook, YouTube and Twitter have basically expelled the Right from their sites.  California has declared war on ICE and the Federal Government.  And the activists federal judges are doing everything up to and including criminal malfeasance to block the Trump Administration wherever they can.  But I think they know they are getting their butts kicked.  Basically, these are delaying actions, scorching the earth behind their retreat.  Good.

So, what about me?  How do I feel about all this?  I am generally optimistic.  I think President Trump has shown that he can handle random catastrophes like the school shooting and deflect a lot of the media noise away from himself and his agenda.  And with the extremely strong economic news and the positive foreign policy news he’s positioned to help the hapless Republicans weather the 2018 midterms.

As a sanity check I understand that bad things are going to happen intermittently throughout the Trump Administration.  And some of them may be so dire that they destroy the progress currently being made.  But that’s the nature of life.  What Trump has done is demonstrate that we need a leader as President not a bureaucrat.  We must demand that whoever is the next President gets results.  He must work for us and not the global cartel.  I just hope Mike Pence is taking good notes and Donald Trump will give us his honest opinion of who his successor should be.

So, there we are.  Things are good and look to get even better.  Maybe Justice Kennedy will do the right thing.  He can vote constitutionally for freedom of religion on the Wedding Baker case and then retire to his beach house on Fire Island and allow a deciding vote Right Wing Justice to ascend to the bench.  We can hope to see the Justice Department prosecuting California for obstructing the immigration laws.  And we can hope to see Mueller ride off into the sunset with his tail between his legs.  Stay tuned.  Better days seem to be upon us.

 

Spring. Rejuvenation. Rebirth. Everything’s Blooming. All That Crap.

I quote this deathless sentiment that George Constanza spoke when thinking of a way to postpone his upcoming nuptials.  As evidenced in my recent post of the mallard photo, life is returning to Southern New England.  This exhibits itself in a random walk up and down the thermometer and barometer.  We’ll have 70 degrees F followed by a foot of snow and back again in dizzying alternation.  It’s very much as if a spiteful nature deity is heaping abuse on the home of the staunchest believers in global warming.  Of course, we innocent bystanders also suffer but shoveling wet heavy snow is good for the soul.  Anyway, without a doubt, spring is in the air.  Plants and animals are stirring and even I, your ancient but faithful chronicler of all things interesting to the deplorable, is feeling 17% spryer.

So, in the interest of full disclosure I’ll be taking a little trip between the Sixteenth and Twenty First of March.  During this interval, I will be both frequently outside of wi-fi range and too occupied with death-defying heroics to post.  I will do my best to provide some content but I fear it will be sub-par in both quantity and quality.  I apologize in advance and beg your patience.  I am hopeful that the trip will provide a goodly stock of interesting photos and narrative.  Until then I will endeavor to provide the usual mixture of irascible political opinion, sophomoric parody, self-important book, music and film reviews and general harping on the foibles of human behavior.

And right on queue a foot of snow was dumped on us last night.  Apparently snow holds no terrors for the mallards but the weather gods are certainly making it difficult for me to get to work.  Guess I’ll just work from home today.

 

Aftermath of 07MAR2018 Snow Storm

 

Aftermath of 07MAR2018 Snow Storm

 

Aftermath of 07MAR2018 Snow Storm

 

Mallards on the Puddle in the Aftermath of 07MAR2018 Snow Storm

 

Mallards on the Puddle in the Aftermath of 07MAR2018 Snow Storm

 

Mallards on the Puddle in the Aftermath of 07MAR2018 Snow Storm

 

Mallards on the Puddle in the Aftermath of 07MAR2018 Snow Storm