The Alice in Wonderland Election

Four years ago, Michael Anton named the 2016 presidential election the Flight 93 Election.  The analogy was that voting for Donald Trump was the equivalent of storming the cockpit to attempt to stop the Democrats (and Republicans) from hijacking and crashing the Unites States of America.

Unexpectedly it worked.  And over the last few years we have seen just how apt the Flight 93 metaphor was.  But we have moved well beyond the analogy because although we may have wrested the cockpit out of the hands of the terrorists, the plane is still taking anti-aircraft fire from enemy forces on the ground.

Well, enough of that metaphor.  Let’s try a new one.  A few days ago I reviewed the current state of the Democrat Presidential Primary and I declared that the only way they could get me to watch them was if I thought I’d get a laugh out of it.  Creepy Uncle Joe could get me to listen to his Tales of Corn Pop or watch him bite his wife’s hand but I wasn’t interested anymore in watching their boring debates or commercials.

But on closer inspection I think maybe boring is the wrong word.  I think the correct word is painful.

Let me elaborate.  When Liarwatha or Bernie starts yammering about the Green New Deal or Medicaid for All, the disconnection from reality is actually painful to listen to.  A sane listener experiences a jarring cognitive dissonance.  It’s like someone is scratching his fingernails across a chalkboard or when you bite down on a sore tooth.  So, it would take quite a bit to get me to listen to this stuff again.

And the same thing occurred when the Schiff gang began their little sitcom around impeachment.  Listening to Pelosi’s minions pretending to be Watergate investigators is just too tedious and nonsensical to follow for more than a minute or two at a time.  One of my friends sent me a link to the testimony Jonathan Turley gave at the hearings.  He is the one “expert” that wasn’t an obvious hack trying to legitimize the Schiff kangaroo court.  I listened to his measured and balanced discussion of what kind of presidential actions would and would not amount to an impeachable offense.  I found him credible.  But I also realized that he would not influence opinion one way or another.  Forty percent of the country would agree with him, another forty percent would call him a liar and the last Twenty Percent would be “unsure.”  The needle wouldn’t even twitch.  So why should I watch this stuff if it makes no difference at all?  I mean I think it’s good for our side to put their side of the story out there to make sure the Twenty Percent hears both sides of the story but for me and my readers there’s no new information provided.

Which brings me back to what I was saying the other day.  The only possible reason to watch the Democrats is for entertainment value.  Creepy Uncle Joe or foaming at the mouth commies will have to pull out all the stops if they want me to tune in.  The denizens of the Island of Broken Toys will have to really try to get me to watch.  Maybe a three stooges slap fight between Joe, Petey and Bernie or a hair pulling cat fight between Fauxcahantas and Hillary might get me to view but not much else.  I mean after the Swalwell fart it has all, more or less, been done.

So here we are with a United States Presidential Election going on, hundreds of millions of Americans making up their minds who will wield the most powerful office of the most powerful nation that has ever existed.  The occupant of this office, an office that has as one of its responsibilities deciding whether to launch a thermonuclear strike with the planetary extinction capability of the US nuclear arsenal, will be chosen by this process.  And as the leading opposition candidates for that job we have Creepy Uncle Joe, Liarwatha, Bernie the Stalinist and Butt Pete.  There is no other way to characterize the situation but as a bizarro world scenario.  The classical description is Alice in Wonderland.  We have a normal observer, Alice, confronted by a world where everything is inverted and the normal rules of nature are suspended.  She struggles to cope with the inconsistency and outright madness but finds herself unable to do more than move from one absurdity to the next.  In this analogy no one would try to make sense of the Mad Hatter or the Queen of Hearts.  It would be futile.  Admittedly some people find this amusing but a steady diet of this sort of thing results in the experience I noted at the beginning of this essay, jarring cognitive dissonance.

To my mind the sensible way to address this election is to try and sway the Twenty Percent by highlighting the positive results and agenda of President Trump and exposing the absurd and dangerous positions and bizarre behaviors of his opponents.  This is what the talking heads on the Right need to do.  They need to pound away at Adam Schiff and Nancy Pelosi and the Deep State that handed them this hot mess.  It’s up to Bill Barr and John Durham to connect the dots on what the Russia and Ukraine scandals are really about.  If it turns out that Hunter Biden was part of a bigger payday for the Obama administration then that will cook Joe Biden’s goose for sure.  But even without that I think we’ll see our side prevail in 2020.

For me this though this is not the mission.  I preach to the choir.  There’s no need to bang that drum.  You all know all this.  My job is to provide my opinions and hopefully amuse.  So, I don’t want to bore anyone with logical arguments as to why the Democrats are wrong about this or that policy position.  You all know they’re the enemy.  I don’t have to convince you.  What I need to do is find some interesting things to discuss about the world we live in and make fun of the evil cretins who want to make us Orwellian slaves.  And that’s what I’ll do, I will chronicle the evil, stupid, absurd and insane doings of the Progressives and their allies in the Media and the Deep State.  That is my mission in the Alice in Wonderland Election.  So down the rabbit hole we go.  Hopefully we’ll meet on the outside again after we wake from the nightmare.

 

Is This Really It?

Don’t the Democrats have more than this for their Impeachment Circus?  Can they keep this going for more than a week?  If not, I think they’re going to be upstaged by whatever balloon mishaps occur during the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade.  In the classic Seinfeld episode, I believe it was Woody the Woodpecker who suffered a puncture wound and deflated on top of Elaine’s boss Mr Pitt.  I’m sure at this point Woody has been retired in favor of some kind of trans-gender super hero but either way Pelosi et alia are going to have to come up with some kind of show stopper.  Perhaps they can perform a séance and have the ghost of Jeffrey Epstein accuse President Trump of strangling him in his New York jail cell.

Honestly, the only thing I can guess is that the DNC is so desperate for Creepy Uncle Joe to be the candidate that they had to do something crazy like this to stop the investigation into Hunter’s pathetic graft expedition in the Ukraine.  And I don’t see how this helps.  If there is anyone on the planet at this point unaware that Joe used his position to force a foreign government to cancel an investigation of his son’s shakedown activities it could only be among coma victims.

The good thing about this feckless farce is that it gives the Republicans the perfect center piece around which to campaign against them.  If they had any wit about them at all, they would seize on this as the embodiment of an infantile and malign force that possesses no positive qualities and is only meant to act as a brake (resistance) to an actual agenda.  Pushing for a border wall in light of the Cartels’ victory over the Mexican Army would be a winning strategy.

But I have little if any faith in the Republicans at this point.  They are only slightly less useless than Pelosi and her crew.  At the rate that the Republicans are retiring from the House it may soon be a strictly Democrat establishment.  It’s a pity.  It seems as if President Trump will be forced to do the whole thing by himself.

Well I’m actually very busy getting work done so that I can have some time off around Thanksgiving and Christmas.  I’m impatiently waiting on Horowitz’s report and the subsequent indictments by Barr’s staff but I haven’t the patience or interest in reading any of the half-witted descriptions by the desperate MSM propagandists of the side show that Schiff and Pelosi are attempting to sell.

So, unless Pelosi is going to do a geriatric strip tease or Schiff is prepared to perform an Aztec sacrificial slaughter on the steps of the Capitol, I’m going to have to decline paying any further notice to this sad non-spectacle.

But bring on the next crazy show by all means.  This one isn’t funny enough.  In fact, I think I’ll re-watch the Seinfeld episode.  Watching Mr. Pitt struggling with the deflating Woody the Woodpecker balloon was way funnier than this.  Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.

 

 

The Liarwatha Strategy

As much as it pains me, I think I’ll have to accept that we’re going to lose Creepy Uncle Joe.  As my regular readers are aware of, I opined that Biden would be the candidate.  And I waxed poetic on the glories of a Biden filled debate experience, the gaffes, the non-sequiturs, possibly even lewd hand gestures.  But it was not meant to be.

This isn’t easy for me to accept.  I was sure he’d have staying power and once he unleashed the “Corn Pop” narrative I thought the troops would rally around his standard.  But I fear it’s too late.  Knowledge of just how crooked Joe and Hunter Biden were has permeated the American consciousness.  I fear Uncle Joe is toast.  No more sidling up and shoulder clutching or hair sniffing.  I fear Joe has fondled his last ambassador’s wife.

Ahh, well.

So, who shall it be?  Well things have settled out and the outcome seems clear.  Fauxcahantas is neck and neck with Creepy Uncle Joe and his backers are pulling back.  Comrade Bernie had a heart attack and appears relatively low energy at this point.  His numbers are trailing off and I assume he’ll be out of the race after New Hampshire.  No one else besides these three has been able to break single digits since early August.  At this point Kamala, Mayor Butt, Spartacus and the rest of that pack of losers are running to see who will be the running mate.  Therefore, Granny Clampett will be the Dem nominee.

Now that I’ve reconciled with the loss of Uncle Joe, it’s time to analyze the correct strategy for defeating the Fake Indian.  And that is an important thing to do.  She will get the same royal treatment that Hillary got when she was running.  As soon as she is the presumptive nominee all polls from that point forward will permanently show her ahead of the President by between five and twenty percentage points.  Also, she will receive nothing but favorable press and every week will feature a puff piece explaining how a woman president is not only the natural result of evolution but also what is predicted, based on being on the right side of history.  And Bill Kristol will declare her the true conservative choice in the race.

I think the important thing to remember is that she will undoubtedly get 100% of the college educated, unmarried, white women’s vote (aka blue-haired cat ladies, present and future).  This is her natural constituency, what the Z-Man would call the vinegar drinking scolds.  She will also get a large chunk of soccer moms, maybe 45% – 55%.  She will get 0% of white working-class men and women.  She will get 30% of upper and middle-class white men.  She will get 95% of the black vote.  She will get 65% of the Hispanic vote.

But here’s the important point, black and Hispanic voters will only come out to vote for her if they are motivated to do so.  If their voters aren’t excited about her, they’ll stay home in droves.  And aside from her fifth-grade teacher’s-nails on the chalkboard-voice, what would turn off the minority voters?  Well how about a fluorescently white woman who used a fake story of minority ancestry to get her a spot on the Faculty of Harvard Law School?  Gee, that might raise a little resentment.  If you were Mexican or Guatemalan, would you want someone who benefitted obscenely from pretending to have Native American blood getting your vote?  I’m guessing not.  And even if she’s pushing slavery reparations and has Kamala Harris as her running mate, I’m not sure that the black voters are really going to embrace her.  Basically, she’s not exactly Barack Obama.

So how do you highlight her dishonesty?  One thing that would work would be to have a tv ad with a Native American spokesman condemning her for the dishonesty and injustice of stealing a spot reserved for someone who truly was a Native American.  This could be reinforced with the text released by the Cherokee nation condemning Warren for her dishonesty and for using her DNA test as some kind of feeble defense.

The timing of this campaign is probably best delayed until the run up to the actual election day.  The middle of October seems like the right time.  Coordinated with this strategy, it would make sense for the President to go after her during the debates on her dishonesty.  A sort of relentless drum beat of accusations on her dishonesty and unfairness to Native Americans sounds like a winning strategy to me.  And, of course it wouldn’t hurt to showcase some of her other weak points.  Her acceptance of the insanely stupid “Green New Deal” that Ocasio-Cortez dreamed up should be especially easy to attack.  With a price tag that probably far exceeds estimates of $94 trillion and an agenda that will crash our economy and deprive us of the energy sources that make modern life economically possible any rational voters will reject candidate who has bought into it.

But the most appealing strategy to apply against Liarwatha is to appeal to people’s innate fear of having to listen interminably to her annoying voice.  The prospect of being hectored for four years by a shrew like her would make any man and many women recoil in horror.  I envision a commercial with a cartoon version of Betty Warren shaking her finger at a crowd of Americans and lecturing them about their responsibilities to the future and reminding them that whatever individual accomplishments they may have achieved that, “you didn’t build that!”

Well, I guess if I have to give up Creepy Uncle Joe, Fauxcahantas won’t be so bad.  I estimate there’s at least a 30% chance she’ll stroke out during the debates.  And after defeating Hillary and Liarwatha the Dems may give the woman candidate thing a pass in 2024.  But then again who knows.  We can always hope that Joe comes back as an 82-year-old trans-gender Creepy Grandma Josephine for an even more exciting race in the future.  He did say there were at least three genders.

 

 

A Busy Week for Right Wing Political Observers

Well, the week has been action packed.  The Climate Nuts are panicking the children and the feeble minded with their Children’s Crusade.  The President humorously mocked the sixteen-year-old climate activist who has been screeching at her supporters all week.  Very funny indeed.

Now Nancy Pelosi and President Trump are sparring over the Ukraine and its investigation of Biden and his son.  Pelosi has begun a formal Impeachment proceeding and all the usual suspects are screaming that treason has been committed and heads will roll.  Of course, the fact that it was Biden and his son that were shaking down the Ukrainians under Obama’s regime is ignored.

And just in case that isn’t enough the British Supreme Court has declared the Prime Minister’s suspension of Parliament illegal.

Interestingly enough Rasmussen shows the President’s approval rating at its highest point in two years (52%).

Well, what does all this mean?  Just that President Trump and his enemies are locked in the death struggle that they’ve had going on for the last four years.  But the difference is he’s eliminated some of the really weak links in his team.  If Jeff Sessions were still Attorney General by now, he would have recused himself in favor of Rod Rosenstein and a new special prosecutor would be drip-dripping stories to the New York Times and Rachel Maddow would be starting her death watch for the Trump Administration again.

But not this time.  Instead, the FBI is investigating the Biden Ukraine scandal and even I am starting to have doubts about Creepy Uncle Joe making it to the convention.  Lately Fauxcahantas has overtaken Bernie in the polls and has even passed Biden in the Iowa poll.  The youth contingent of the progressives is happy to see that an old white guy won’t be the candidate but the party leaders are worried that the Fake Indian won’t get the enthusiastic support of the black community.  In particular, black women haven’t really embraced Warren.  This kind of uncertainty is very good for our side.  It won’t give the Dems as much time to memory hole the dirt on whichever candidate gets through.  And it will make it harder to recruit the Veep for the ticket.  After all Creepy Joe is a strange weirdo but compared to the likes of Warren or Harris, he’s almost Santa Claus.

Many right wing pundits fear Fauxcahantas as the more formidable opponent in 2020.  I will admit that she hasn’t forgotten what state she’s in or mixed up which decade things happened like Plugs Biden has, but she’s a deeply unlikeable woman whose only natural constituency is middle aged professional white women.  Men find her voice comparable to fingernails screeching over a chalk board.  In other words, sort of like Hillary Clinton.

Also, she has publicly stated that she supports Medicaid for all, free healthcare for illegal aliens and the ludicrously expensive and hopelessly ineffective Green New Deal.  I think even Jeb Bush could manage to attack her over those awful policies.  But it won’t be Jeb at the debates it will be the Man Who Buried Hillary.  The only real question is whether he calls her Liarwatha during his opening statement or during the first round of questions.

So far this has been a very interesting week.  Many people feel that President Trump intentionally initiated this Ukraine dust-up to force Pelosi to begin impeachment.  At this point, that seems possible.  The consensus is that Pelosi wanted to save an impeachment drama for closer to the election to hurt the President’s election chances.  But letting the Ukraine investigate Biden’s son would throw a cloud over the current leading candidate’s campaign and breed fear, uncertainty and depression for the Dems.  It’s sort of a lose/lose situation for the Dems.  There is the chance that forcing the country to go through an impeachment process this close to the election and for no good reason could throw the House of Representatives to the Republicans next year and strengthen President Trump’s hand immeasurably.

And finally getting back to the Brexit situation it remains to be seen if Boris Johnson will be willing to allow a Hard Brexit to occur by refusing to request an extension from the EU.  If that occurs, he could possibly be charged with a crime.  This really is an amazing situation.  It will take guts to do it but if he does it might make him the most popular Prime Minister since Winston Churchill.

Stay tuned.  Things seem to be heating up.

 

22SEP2019 Update – The Dem Race Begins to Take Shape

So, this week we’ve lost Bill DeBlasio.  As the President mentioned, New York City is in a panic because Bill’s returning there and sure to cause fresh havoc in Gotham City.

And word has come down from Spartacus that unless his backers send him $1.7 million before September 30th, he’s going to drop his shield and short sword and drop out of the race.  Kind of makes you wonder a little about why he’s in the race.  What I want to know is who will keep the white supremacists in check if Cory drops out of the race.  I mean sure, Creepy Uncle Joe and Kamala Harris are woke to the threat of rampaging gun-wielding white fascists but Spartacus was the one who made it his signature issue.  And without a doubt Beto has laid claim to the gun grabbing title with his hats, coffee mugs and other branded paraphernalia but Spartacus was so much more real.  Yes, Cory Booker will be missed by those supremacists.

Today I read that Fauxcahantas has taken a two-point lead over Creepy Joe in Iowa.  Losing Uncle Joe so early in the process would be a blow.  The whole problem of his son and the Ukraine could spell the end of my prediction for Joe to be the November victim for President Trump.  So sad, so sad.  Well if it’s to be Fauxcahantas (and I’m not admitting to it yet) then let it be Fauxcahantas and Kamala Harris.  That is a dream ticket for President Trump.  Between the shrieks of Fauxcahantas and the whining and crying of Harris there wouldn’t be a man in America with a testosterone level above zero who would vote for that nightmare.  Now the flip side of that is every cat lady and power skirt in the country will try to vote twice for them.  But somehow, I don’t see them getting much of the female black vote.

Bernie is now only ahead of Warren in New Hampshire where he is shown trailing Joe by about a point.  But nationally the Fake Indian is leading him by a couple of points.  Bernie won’t drop out soon.  He’s got a lot of money and a loyal core of Bernie Bros who won’t desert him.

Pete Butt also has a good pile of cash to keep him going and the desire to be Vice President and I see him hanging in there for a good long time.  But as to who would select him for Veep, maybe Harris?  I’m guessing nobody really wants him aboard.

So, of the candidates who still might be around in a few weeks, that leaves Beto.  I think Harris would like to have him for a Veep.  He’s so incredibly shallow and stupid that by comparison even she would look sort of intelligent.  And he’s got a skateboard you know.  He’ll definitely get the poser and hipster vote motivated.

All the rest of the losers hovering around at 3% or lower will be gone by Halloween.  It’s pretty clear that the Media wants Creepy Uncle Joe to drop out.  They’re afraid that he’s too senile and has too many skeletons in his closet to beat the President.  And they’re right but honestly, it’s not as if Bernie or Fake Indian aren’t just as looney.  It’s that old white guy just seems impossible for their narrative.

Emotionally I’m tied to the idea of Creepy Uncle Joe going into the debates.  The spastic hilarity just draws me in.  But Fake Indian is great too.  Fauxcahantas has more than one arrow in her quiver if I may be permitted to use the metaphor.  She shrieks and her eyes bulge behind her Granny Clampett glasses and she gestures and gesticulates like some demented third grade teacher.  There is greatness there.

But never let it be said that I’m a fair-weather friend.  I’m sticking with Crazy Uncle Joe to the bitter end.  The only condition I put on his candidacy is if he strokes out.  If he does, I’ll pull support.  I can’t be responsible for the death of anyone, even Creepy Uncle Joe.

So, let’s recap.  With the Media and nervous big money pushing to anoint Fauxcahantas, Creepy Uncle Joe is hoping to weather the Ukraine thing while Bernie plods along waving the Hammer and Sickle flag of Communism for the Bernie Bros to see.  The only losers who’ll hang in for the Veep sweepstakes look like Harris, Beto, Mayor Pete Butt and maybe Spartacus.  I’m holding out for Uncle Joe but the vultures are beginning to circle.  Stay tuned for more excitement in October.

 

I Detect a Little Panic on the Left

I read this article today and as much as I hate to click on a left-wing site (in this case NY Magazine) I couldn’t resist the title (What If the Only Democrat Who Isn’t Too Radical to Win Is Too Old? By Jonathan Chait).  I’ve linked to it but don’t feel you have to click on it.  I took the hit for all of you.  But it really is a delicious broth of fear and confusion.  Apparently, the Democrat party and the Media have decided that Democrat voters will embrace a radical left wing agenda in 2020.  And their reason for believing this is that Twitter told them so.  They are embracing the social media exclusion of the Right as a basis for believing that everyone is a woke Millennial.  It’s wonderful.  Apparently soccer moms in the Midwest have just been dying for someone to take away their private health insurance and give the money to illegal aliens so they can have health care.

Now even the Democrats are starting to jump on the Creepy Joe bandwagon.  I’m starting to feel pretty prescient right about now.  But it’s still early, shouldn’t get too far in front of reality.  But the Trump/Biden debate is looking sweeter and sweeter by the moment.

 

Scenes From the Third Democrat Debate

Just for laughs I turned on the debate for about a half hour.  The free for all was shrieking about healthcare.  Every single one of the maniacs was jabbering about how his plan was better than their plans because their plans would leave millions dying from scurvy while his plan would guarantee eternal life and youth.  And most of them took the opportunity to kick poor old Creepy Joe in the in the family jewels for some especially awful shortcomings in his version of Medicare for all.  One especially bitter moment for Joe was when Yang called him out on some defect in his plan.  Joe answered that the defect didn’t exist but Yang countered that just minutes before Joe has sworn the opposite was true.  Poor Joe.  Somehow Obamacare wasn’t Barack’s fault but instead Joe’s.  Pretty remarkable.

The other section had to do with criminal justice.  Every candidate wanted to empty the prisons and use some kind of reparations bill to pay back criminals for being criminals.  The only criminals they didn’t like were white supremacists.  They apparently are the only real criminals in America.  And the reparations for African Americans cannot be big enough.  Apparently it will be an endless river of money that will never come close to solving the problem but it must be done anyway.  And the clowns all agreed that Donald Trump is indeed a white supremacist, racist, really, really bad guy.

At that point I thought I’d seen enough.  My only real hope is that all this is recorded for later use by the President’s re-election committee.  There were a thousand moments when any and all of those imbeciles made themselves transparently unfit to lead this country.  Their policies are impossible to implement from either a financial or a constitutional point of view and even if these policies could be enacted a majority of Americans will recognize them as at best unfair and at worst insane.

Think of it.  They want to empty the prisons.  What will that do to the ‘hood?  They want to provide universal healthcare.  Wasn’t that Obamacare?  Won’t this just be more degradation of the existing private system to spread the bad coverage that Obamacare already gave us?  And reparations.  We’re going to give trillions of dollars to one group of people, who for the last fifty years have been the recipients of affirmative action which allegedly isn’t enough, and we’ll obtain those trillions by taking them from people, most of whose ancestors weren’t even in America when slavery existed.  Would you vote for someone promising that?

I don’t know how many more debates there are but by the last one the candidates will be down to promising to burn the country to the ground just to make sure that everyone is absolutely equally miserable.  These folks are literally insane.  I’m guessing this should put an end to their 2020 hopes.  Either that or I’m crazy.

 

 

09SEP2019 – American Greatness Post of the Day – Biden or Bust by VDH

Victor Davis Hanson apparently agrees with my guess that Creepy Uncle Joe is the Dems choice for least likely to frighten off the marginally sane portion of their voters.

https://amgreatness.com/2019/09/08/biden-or-bust/

 

Well, good.  I was starting to feel self-conscious with all the Fauxcahantas talk.  And we deserve to have Joe at the debates.  I think he’ll charge Trump’s lectern and will have to be tranq darted by his own Secret Service team to prevent Trump’s larger Secret Service team from handling him themselves.

 

 

 

The Democrat Primary Field – Part 1 – Joe Biden

Looking at the field in the Democratic 2020 Presidential Primary it’s remarkable to see just how many of these people are demonstrably unhinged.  And I’m looking beyond Marianne Williamson and Corey Booker who are beyond the pale when it comes to eccentricity.  But right now, I’d like to start with the front runner, Creepy Uncle Joe Biden.

First off, with all the gaffes and dead air during the debates is there any doubt that Joe has lost more than a step or two off his fighting prime?  If elected he would be older than Reagan was when he stepped down in 1989.  And that is definitely the least of his problems.

Joe Biden is captured on film during official government proceedings sidling up behind women, grabbing their shoulders and sniffing their hair, or putting his hands on their ribcages just slightly below their breasts.  Now, definitely, in the reign of Caligula this kind of behavior would have been down right benign from a comparative psychosexual perspective.  But today, unless you’re a character in an FBI behavioral science procedural drama you’re supposed to keep your hands off the other homo sapiens you’re not married to.  What creepy fetishistic process is going on in his head when he does these kinds of things in front of cameras?  Does he think he’s invisible or above the scrutiny of observers?  Are we supposed to think that he’s just that over enthusiastic old uncle who likes to hug everybody but doesn’t mean anything by it?  What must it have been like in the Biden home around Christmas time with all the young girl relatives doing a duck and cover every time they heard slipper-shod footsteps closing in from behind?  The mind boggles.

Joe has been a strange duck since always.  Back in 1988 when he ran for President the first time he was hounded by multiple charges of plagiarism and inaccurate statements about his academic record and forced to withdraw.  Now admittedly some of this was because that dweeb Dukakis was playing lawyer ball against his rivals.  But let’s face it, lying about your college record isn’t very smart.  Then there’s the hair plugs.  Anyway, Joe’s whole career is littered with lies, exaggeration and braggadocio but without any actual accomplishments.  In a way he is the perfect Democrat candidate.

But now Joe has to win the 2020 nomination and Joe’s dinosaur version of Democrat candidacy doesn’t mesh with the woke, #metoo, progressive politics.  He’s been attacked by Kamala Harris for working with the Southern Democrats back in the 1970s.  She accused him of trying to keep young Kamala from being bussed back in California.  And Corey Booker accused Joe’s 1990s crime bill of incarcerating the entire population of Newark, New Jersey.  Poor Joe.

Initially Joe had been dialing back his aggression toward his fellow candidates because of the politically correct requirements of an old white male Democrat defending himself from the diversity scrum that the Democrat debates have turned into lately.  Because of this, Joe has somewhat become a punching bag for the likes of Kamala Harris and Corey Booker.  But finally, he seems to have escaped from this situation and is now fighting back with such inspired zingers as, “Watch out kid!” and “Go easy on me kid!”  The interesting thing about the race is that Joe’s standing in the polls really hasn’t been lowered very much at all from the heavy pounding he took in the first and second debates.  According to the news reports on television and the newspapers Joe was slaughtered in each of those debates and should have plummeted precipitously in the polls from all these beatings.  But there he still stands, way ahead of his opponents.  Apparently, the voters recognize that he has promised the fewest impossible things and therefore is the least unelectable Democrat in the general election.  And as his numbers remain above theirs, the lowest tier candidates will begin the depressing thought process of when to pull the plug on their hopeless pursuit of the nomination.  In fact, former Colorado Governor Hickenlooper and California Representative Swalwell have already pulled the plug and now will join the ranks of bitter losers mumbling “2024” under their breaths and counting up the money they managed to add to their war chests this year.

Does Joe have access to the industrial strength fix that was “in” when Hillary was running against Bernie and the Bros?  That’s the million-dollar question.  Has Obama anointed Joe?  Seemingly not.  All the indications are that Obama is keeping his options open.  He probably knows that Joe is not as inspiring to the Hopey/Changey crowd as he was.  But even slipping into imbecility and marked with the sign of Cain, Creepy Joe should be able to beat Liarwatha and the rest of the midgets.  After all, each of them has incredible negatives too.  Granny Warren was a pretend Cherokee.  Kamala Harris slept her way to the top.  Mayor Pete was the mayor of a large town!  Corey Booker, well he’s Corey Booker.  He actually called himself Spartacus, on purpose!  Bernie is like a Commie version of Uncle Leo from the Seinfeld show.  Joe will beat these guys because he can pretend to be sane.  They can’t hide their crazy.  He’s the bull goose looney and will be the candidate.

But that’s as far as he’ll get.  The general election will be a slaughter of poor Sleepy Creepy Joe.  After all President Trump is no kid and definitely won’t go easy on Biden.  Sorry Joe.

So, here’s to you Joe, you creepy, sleepy, gropey son of a gun.  You may be nuts but you’re still the best of the bunch.  Long may you grab those shoulders and sniff that hair.

 

The Democrat Primary Field – Part 2 – Elizabeth Warren