Notes on the Fourth Democrat Debate – Liarwatha Buries the Competition

I tuned into about forty-five minutes of the fourth debate tonight.  Fauxcahantas smoked her cracked brain competition.  And she did it with a populist message that will resonate a lot more with the general public than the goofball bleating of her fellow liars.  Granted she’s just as dishonest and dangerous to the health and wealth of this country but she can at least sound coherent when she describes the globalist corporate madness that has bankrupted this nation.  She will be dangerous in the general election.

Creepy Uncle Joe gaffed his way through a number of talking points that in a way was impressive.  He combined short term memory failures with a certain folksy glibness that’s almost remarkable.  And based on the incoherence of the other mental midgets around him it was somewhat entertaining.

Bernie was his old irascible self.  He did not appear weak or ill or confused.  He gave of his best and that best is the promise of more and more socialism until even Stalin would say uncle.  One thing he was vehement about was that billionaires are going to get it in the neck.  Billionaire Tom Steyer agreed and promised to tax himself out of existence.

And all of the rest of the dwarves agreed.  Now if they could guarantee that Amazon, Facebook and Twitter were at the front of that line I think I could come around to agreeing to that campaign plank.  But honestly, I’d much prefer we just broke up those lefty monopolies altogether.

When healthcare was being discussed Harris and Spartacus reminded us that pro-life legislature was curtailing the activities of Planned Parenthood and she claimed that meant women of color would die.  She never mentioned that it might mean a lot of babies of color might live.  But there was nobody there who cared about that.

Pete Butt actually said a few sensible things.  When the talk about bringing jobs back from Mexico had Fauxcahantas and Beto waxing poetic Mayor Pete reminded everybody that President Trump was elected in part because he said he would do something about lost jobs that everybody else said were gone forever.  Honesty at a Democratic Primary Debate?  Well he claims he’s very religious, maybe that was a Gay Christian Hail Mary Pass.  Might get him to three percent.

Andrew Yang says he’ll give everyone a thousand bucks a month to quit the jobs they don’t like.  Tulsi Gabbard acted worried and empathetic about everything.  Damned if I can remember what Amy Klobuchar and Julián Castro said.  I doubt even they know or care.

So, my take away from this debate is that Granny Clampett is a dangerous opponent in the general election.  She has decent debate skills and she will spout a populist message that has many attractive points.  Luckily, she has a track record of lying about her intentions.  And that is where I think she needs to be attacked.  Fauxcahantas and Liarwatha are the perfect names to use when attacking her on the screen.  Her use of deceit for personal gain is documented and is sure to alienate the minority vote that she will so desperately need in the general election.

President Trump, invite Massachusetts journalist Howie Carr up to the White House and let him give you his fifty favorite Fake Indian stories and then pick the best of the best for the 2020 campaign commercials.  That should be about right.

 

 

 

Scenes From the Third Democrat Debate

Just for laughs I turned on the debate for about a half hour.  The free for all was shrieking about healthcare.  Every single one of the maniacs was jabbering about how his plan was better than their plans because their plans would leave millions dying from scurvy while his plan would guarantee eternal life and youth.  And most of them took the opportunity to kick poor old Creepy Joe in the in the family jewels for some especially awful shortcomings in his version of Medicare for all.  One especially bitter moment for Joe was when Yang called him out on some defect in his plan.  Joe answered that the defect didn’t exist but Yang countered that just minutes before Joe has sworn the opposite was true.  Poor Joe.  Somehow Obamacare wasn’t Barack’s fault but instead Joe’s.  Pretty remarkable.

The other section had to do with criminal justice.  Every candidate wanted to empty the prisons and use some kind of reparations bill to pay back criminals for being criminals.  The only criminals they didn’t like were white supremacists.  They apparently are the only real criminals in America.  And the reparations for African Americans cannot be big enough.  Apparently it will be an endless river of money that will never come close to solving the problem but it must be done anyway.  And the clowns all agreed that Donald Trump is indeed a white supremacist, racist, really, really bad guy.

At that point I thought I’d seen enough.  My only real hope is that all this is recorded for later use by the President’s re-election committee.  There were a thousand moments when any and all of those imbeciles made themselves transparently unfit to lead this country.  Their policies are impossible to implement from either a financial or a constitutional point of view and even if these policies could be enacted a majority of Americans will recognize them as at best unfair and at worst insane.

Think of it.  They want to empty the prisons.  What will that do to the ‘hood?  They want to provide universal healthcare.  Wasn’t that Obamacare?  Won’t this just be more degradation of the existing private system to spread the bad coverage that Obamacare already gave us?  And reparations.  We’re going to give trillions of dollars to one group of people, who for the last fifty years have been the recipients of affirmative action which allegedly isn’t enough, and we’ll obtain those trillions by taking them from people, most of whose ancestors weren’t even in America when slavery existed.  Would you vote for someone promising that?

I don’t know how many more debates there are but by the last one the candidates will be down to promising to burn the country to the ground just to make sure that everyone is absolutely equally miserable.  These folks are literally insane.  I’m guessing this should put an end to their 2020 hopes.  Either that or I’m crazy.

 

 

Clown Car – Health Care – Food Fight

I tuned into a few minutes of the second night of the Second Democrat Primary Debate so my impressions are based on the topic under discussion at that point.  But I’m sure the rest of it was much the same.  I would describe it as something like what you would see and hear if a tornado ripped through an insane asylum.  Everywhere you look a virtual kaleidoscope of lunatics would be whizzing by.  The rules seem to limit each speech to something like eleven seconds but staccato rebuttals can go on endlessly.  And the top lunatic, based on face time seemed to be Kamala Harris.  My strongest impression of Harris is that no matter what she is talking about she is always on the verge of bursting into tears.  Her voice is almost choked with emotion regardless of whether she is emoting about the uninsured poor or bragging about Cathy Sebelius endorsing her health plan or demanding another rebuttal.  She’s like the emotionally unstable little sister in a family that gets her way because her parents are afraid to ever say no to her.  They fear that if she didn’t get her way, she’d shake herself to pieces through nervous fragility.  Kamala really is the poster child for the Progressive Left.  She’s wound up tighter than a spring but all of this nervous energy is just overwrought emotion.  There’s nothing else there.

It’s funny how surrounded by this crowd Joe Biden truly is the voice of sanity.  Now, granted, it is a dishonest voice.  But we’re used to plain old lying from Democrats.  It’s just that juxtaposed against Harris, DeBlasio, Booker and Gillibrand, Creepy Uncle Joe seems like a normal guy because he isn’t speaking gibberish.

Based on the audience response and the way the moderators are according rebuttal time Creepy Joe is basically on trial.  He’s being tag teamed like a pinata surrounded by a fifth-grade class.  And he was starting to seem a little raggedy from the pounding.  My guess is that tomorrow he’ll be announced the big loser of the night and Spartacus will be the flavor of the week.  And snap polls will show Creepy Joe   down to low single digit leads over the second tier of Bernie and Fauxcahontas.  But that seems like a replay of the first debate.  I’m still betting that a week from now Joe will start heading back up to 30% and the rest of the clown parade will be half of that or much less.

Now when this race gets down to a six-way horse race maybe one of that second tier will break loose.  But right now, it’s just a melee of maniacs shouting out nutty stuff that costs tens of trillions of dollars and hoping to last another week.  Joe just has to put up with the abuse until the crowd shrinks down to the point where accountability prevents gibberish from being acceptable.

Hail to you Creepy Pinata Joe.  Long may you be pummeled by CNN and the Clown Parade.  Keep your head above water for a few more months and you’ll get to be the nominee and before you’re eviscerated by President Trump, you’ll get to stuff a billion dollars into your campaign war chest and ride off into the sunset like the Clintons.

 

Monday’s Debate without the Fantasy

Watching yesterday’s debate was a fascinating, frustrating informative look at this year’s election dynamic.  The most important fact I observed was that Donald Trump was the first Republican since Ronald Reagan who knew how to stand up to the moderator at a debate and say what he needed to say.

Think of the pathetic image of Mitt Romney being corrected by Candy Crowley on something that he had gotten right.  And that he meekly allowed her to get away with it.  Compare that to Trump.  Not only did he object to many things Hillary said (and while she was still speaking) but when Lester Holt tried to correct him on Stop and Frisk, Trump corrected Holt!  It was a pleasure to hear and see.  Trump may have been rambling and repetitive a lot of the time but at least he wasn’t cowed by the tag team of Clinton and Holt.  He asserted his opinion and it was a breath of fresh air.

Trump was even able to overcome the overtly biased nature of the questions.  Whereas Clinton was given neutral questions about her policy direction, Holt singled out Trump to defend his decision not to release his income tax records.  And to his credit he skillfully turned it right around on Clinton by declaring that he would release his income tax records just as soon as Hillary recovered the 33,000 e-mails that she has deleted.  It is this kind of verbal jiu-jitsu that distinguishes the effective debate performance of Trump from the weak passive performance of the last four or five republican presidential contenders.

Let me be clear.  Trump is no Reagan.  He is not a deep thinker.  He’s a salesman.  But he knows enough about scams to know that all of us are being scammed by the politicians.  He is an American and I think he empathizes with the common man.  Is he trustworthy?  Not if you’re buying steaks or college courses.  But that’s not what he’s selling.  What he’s offering is his expertise in negotiating with sharp operators. Some commentators friendly to Trump believe he avoided overtly attacking Clinton on personal matters (such as Bill’s womanizing and assaults) because it might have seemed overly aggressive. I think they’re right. He came off as a relatively moderate version of Trump which robbed his enemies (i.e., all of the MSM) of their charge that Trump is irrational. No national poll has been issued since the debate but a number of instant polls have appeared and the majority show people believe Trump won.

We’re six weeks out and two more debates to go. Where do I think we are? I’m starting to think Trump is going to pull it off. I fully expect the NYT, WP and NBC will come out with polls showing Hillary up by some enormous amount (6 to 10 points). But if the other polls (LAT, Rasmussen, Reuters, etc.) don’t move much or at all then I think he’ll win. My hope is that in fact some of the polls will even show him ahead by a significant amount (3 – 5 points). But that’s not even necessary yet. Just the fact that he’s right on her tail will be enough.

In short I feel the Trumpocalypse is afoot. Take cover.

Trump vs the Urban Fantasy Debate

Scene 1: Trump Campaign HQ. Two nights before the First Debate.

 

Campaign Manager Steve Bannon (SB):  Mr. Trump, you called for me?

Donald Trump (DT):  Bannon, I need your help preparing for the debate.

SB:  Certainly sir.  Do you need someone to stand in for Mrs. Clinton or the moderator?

DT:  Well sort of.  I need someone who’s the same height and weight as Hillary.

SB:  Uhhhh …… why?

DT:  I need to practice some fighting techniques for when she vamps out and rushes me.

SB:  Mr. Trump, I must assure you that there is absolutely no possibility that Mrs. Clinton is a vampire.  And despite what occurred in Louisiana, you are most definitely not a werewolf.

DT:  Look Bannon, obviously you’re just not as perceptive as I am.  You know, with my werewolf senses and stuff.  Trust me.  It’s completely certain that she is some species of undead and 83% certain to be a vampire.  The science is settled on this point.  You either have to lead, follow or get out of the way.  I intend to lead.  My plan is to replace the drinking water on the stage with holy water and when she drinks it her face and throat will burst into flames.  At that point I intend to stake her and pin her to the podium carpet.  Then I’ll  explain to the Secret Service the importance of decapitating her and stuffing her mouth with garlic as soon as the debate is finished.  My only problem at this point is whether I should go after Bill next or hold off until the full moon.  I believe he is the senior vampire and his strength may be too great for me to take him down without my werewolf power.

SB:  For God’s sake stop this insanity.  You’re running for the most powerful office in the world.  If anyone heard you talking like this you’d be locked up in a nuthouse within an hour.  When I took this job I knew you were goofy but I didn’t think you were bat-shit crazy.  Look I should probably drop a dime on you myself but so help me I need this gig to work.  So come on, snap out of it and try to act sane.

DT:  Bannon, I can’t work with someone so stupid. You’re fired. Now send in Kellyanne so I can get going on this debate prep work.

SB: Goodbye and good riddance you psycho.

Scene 2: First Presidential Debate.

BBC Correspondent (BBCC): Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen and welcome to the BBC radio coverage of the 2016 First Presidential Debate between Democratic Party candidate, the esteemed former First Lady, United States Senator and Secretary of State, Hillary Rodham Clinton and Republican Party candidate, the eccentric failed businessman and reality show personality Donald Trump. The candidates have met for a decidedly tepid handshake and now have taken their places at their podiums. Mrs Clinton is looking decidedly hale and hearty and not at all like the frail elderly person that the Trump campaign has presented her as. As you can now hear Mr. Trump is making some decidedly sophomoric opening remarks about mexican payment for masonry or some such rubbish. Now it is Mrs. Clinton’s turn and as you must hear her diction and elocution is masterful and might I even say delightful. Why it seems entirely possible that Mr. Trump may retreat immediately and vacate the stage in the face of such commanding eloquence. Mrs. Clinton has finished and the studio audience is standing and applauding quite spontaneously. It’s an amazing sight. I think I can be forgiven for saying that a second debate will be completely unnecessary. I feel I must go on the record to congratulate Madam President for this amazing victory. Well done, oh well done.

Trump looks dumbfounded he’s just looking at Hillary as if he expects more punishment from her. Mrs. Clinton is basking in the glow of her still cheering audience. Now she’s reaching for her glass of water for a well deserved beverage. The moderator has asked Trump his first question but the oafish challenger is so overwhelmed by the intellectual beating he’s just taken he hasn’t heard a word of it. He’s still staring at the First Lady as if she will further abuse him while drinking her water. Does he imagine her to be a ventriloquist?

Wait a minute something terrible has just occurred! An enormous flash of light and flames have erupted around the face of Hillary Rodham Clinton. Was the water in the glass actually some kind of incendiary material. A horrible shriek is going up. Oh the poor woman! The secret service is converging on her. They’ve encircled her. Oh help her, help her! She’s on the floor now. But wait the agents are scattering away. All but one. He is holding the First Lady. No she has him. Now he’s screaming. Something unbelievable is occurring. Mrs. Clinton seems to have increased in size and metamorphosed somehow. She is ripping out of the delightful powder blue pantsuit and is taking on a decidedly bat-like appearance. She seems to have exsanguinated the secret service gentleman and is approaching the moderator. This is taking a decidedly unexpected turn and it appears that the moderator feels that Mrs. Clinton has exceeded the already very generous bounds of allowable debating technique at this juncture.

But hold on, Mr. Trump is charging at Mrs. Clinton and appears to have a large pointed wooden implement in his hand. Although this also seems outside the bounds of allowable debating etiquette it appears the moderator is not going to object. Mrs. Clinton must have noticed his approach because she has pivoted away from the moderator and is facing Trump. But alas she is too late. He has implanted the wooden object into Mrs. Clinton’s thoracic region right up to the hilt. And he calls himself a gentleman! Shocking.

Mrs. Clinton has landed on her back and is thrashing about spasmodically. Mr. Trump is standing back. He’s saying something. I can’t make it out. I’m looking at the program feed that we provide for the deaf viewers and it has transcribed his words as “suck on that Bannon.” Well that strikes me as entirely cryptic.

Well Mrs. Clinton appears to have expired and is beginning to deflate down into a dessicated pile of detritus. Mr. Trump is returning to his podium and appears about to speak. Let’s move in for his comments.

DT: Good evening my fellow Americans. Tonight we have witnessed the ultimate proof of the greatness that is Trump. I have saved America from the undead and also higher taxes. Because of the short window of opportunity to select a new democratic candidate I have instructed the Democrats to leave Hillary’s name on the ballot. Let’s face it, anyone they picked at this point is probably also undead and I’ll just have to stake him too. Because of the shocking events of tonight and also because I myself am now a werewolf, I’ve decided to end my campaigning activities and will just wait for your acclamation in November. So go back to your lives and don’t worry about anything. Werewolf Trump has got your back. After my inauguration I’ll be using my special werewolf senses to root out injustice and corruption wherever it exists in the federal government. My summary judgement will be brutal but fair. Also I’ll be taping these events for my new reality series “Vigilante Werewolf President.” It will be hard-hitting but classy. Very little nudity. I predict it will last eight seasons or more. Trump out.