Democrat 2020 Race – 04DEC2019 Update

Well here we are in December and Kamala Harris even ending her campaign is so boring I can barely bother to fake interest in watching her rip-cord speech.  And I shouldn’t have bothered.  She didn’t even cry or anything.  Sure, her face looked kind of spastic at points but that’s just her face.  Of course, she gave us the blather about fighting on and on for women and persons of color and colorful personal women but it looked like she was really connecting the dots hoping she can be Butt Pete’s running mate.  There just wasn’t any fun in the whole thing.

So, the highlights of the race in the last few weeks were:

  • Joe Biden and the details of the Corn Pop speech with his blond leg hair and kids playing with it in the pool.
  • Joe Biden’s No Malarkey Barnstorming Iowa Magical Mystery Tour Bus
  • Joe Biden tries to amputate his wife’s forefinger with his new shiny white dentures
  • Eric Swalwell farts on the Chris Matthews Show.

Well all right, that last one doesn’t count because Swalwell resigned a while ago.  But it actually was the funniest thing in the list.  Honestly, it’s starting to seem like even the Democrats know that they will lose in 2020 but feel like they have to hang in there just in case famine or pestilence breaks out to save them.  Unfortunately, they’re atheists and divine intervention wouldn’t take their side.

The other hope they hold is the Impeachment Show.  But it seemed to run out of gas and viewers last week and turning it over to Nadler doesn’t promise to improve things.  No, they’re going to have to try to hold the public’s interest on their own with debates and commercials and PBS and CBS specials.  But it’s hopeless.  The only non-boring actors, Biden and Sanders, are certifiable loons.  Creepy Uncle Joe gets weirder every time he opens his mouth and it can’t be long before he starts undressing on stage and challenges the audience to a wrestling match.  Bernie, on the other hand, will eventually slip up and reveal his deep longing for the return of Stalinist Russia and the good old days.

A month or two ago I threw in the towel on Joe being the candidate and assumed Liarwatha was the front runner.  But supposedly she imploded when people figured out the Green New Deal and Medicaid for All would actually mean the new tax rate would be 150% of total salary.  So now Butt Pete is “The Man,” sort of.  But let’s face it, none of them can win or even look like a realistic candidate for President of the United States.  And admittedly Donald Trump wouldn’t have seemed like a likely candidate for president a generation ago.  But the gap between President Trump and this Field of Losers from the Island of Broken Toys is disturbing.  I can only assume they’re saving the normal candidates for 2024.

All right, so that’s where we are.  Bloomfield and Patrick have joined the circus but more clowns are not going to change the equation.  I still hold out great hope that the Presidential Debates between the President and whichever midget is nominated will be a laugh riot.  But until then I’ll have to subsist on Biden gaffes and Swalwell gas.

 

Electoral College Calculus – November 2019 Installment

Trying to handicap a presidential election is far from an exact science.  So, let’s have some fun.

Here is a map of the 2016 presidential results in terms of the electoral college votes.  Trump won by 77 electoral votes, 304 to 227.

 

 

A few things come to mind.  That 77 electoral college vote lead in 2016 translates into a lot of flexibility in 2020.  The three big surprises in 2016 were Pennsylvania, Michigan and Wisconsin.  Well a 77 electoral college vote lead means you can lose additional states with up to an additional 38 electoral votes and still win the election.  For instance, Pennsylvania and Michigan have big cities like Detroit and Philadelphia where voter fraud is almost the rule.  Together those two states have 36 electoral votes.  If President Trump won all the states he won before except for Pennsylvania and Michigan, he’d still win.  That’s pretty good.  It would be very close but he’d still win.  But you might say what about Wisconsin and its 10 votes?  Well, the folks in Minnesota and Wisconsin are still relatively honest and in fact the blue-collar workers up there have actually increased their support for President Trump over the last several years.  I’ll say that it is possible that Wisconsin could go too but let’s look at those two states together.

Now look at some of the “close” states he lost.

Notice in each case that a third-party candidate (either Libertarian or Never-Trump or both) represented more than enough votes to turn the race around if shifted to the Republicans.

The first item up is Minnesota.  Trump lost by less than 45,000 votes.  McMullin who was a Never-Trumper protest candidate took over 53,000 votes.  That tells you there were over 53,000 extra republican voters available in 2016.  Well in 2020 McMullin won’t be running or if he is only Bill Kristol will be voting for him.  But most of those 53,000 Republicans will be voting.  Not to mention all the other blue-collar Democrats who now know that President Trump is pro-worker.  My strong opinion is that President Trump will pick up Minnesota’s 10 electoral votes in 2020.  So, going back to an earlier scenario, let’s say that Wisconsin flips, well it’s just as likely that we’ll snag Minnesota this time instead.  That’s pretty good.

The other states are a lot harder to handicap until we know who the Democrat candidate will be.  If Bernie or Liarwatha is the Democrat candidate then either one of their socialist platforms will be a big problem for the libertarians.  And if that’s the case then Gary Johnson’s pot head voters might vote their pocketbooks and in Minnesota, New Mexico, Nevada, Maine and Colorado that should be more than enough to tilt all those states to President Trump.

In theory that would change the Electoral College scores (all other things being equal) to 337 to 194.  Of course, this assumes that the Democrats would allow their daft electorate to choose their own candidate.  In actuality the politburo wants Creepy Uncle Joe or Bloomberg or Deval Patrick to be the candidate.  And that’s the big question mark.  Can they make the switch at the convention?  The way things are going Biden may not make it to the convention.  He may be an indicted co-conspirator along with his nincompoop son Hunter for the Ukraine mess.  So that would require either Bloomberg or Obama’s mini-me shadow Patrick to play candidate.  Neither is really the perfect candidate.  Bloomberg is an insufferable rich guy trying to get the votes of the urban poor that he subjected to the stop and frisk program in New York City which in Progressive circles is considered an abomination.  Patrick is a short squeaky voiced doofus that will be less than inspiring to the same urban crowd.  I’m guessing neither of them will bring out the Obama sized voting crowd.

But let’s say it is Bloomberg or Patrick.  That will cut into the Gary Johnson vote for sure.  But does it really change the overall situation on the ground?  In either of those scenarios I see Minnesota and the states he won in 2016 still going to President Trump and the rest of those states above toss-ups that, let’s say, go to the Dems.  Final Electoral College total 314 to 217.  That’s almost a hundred-point difference.  That means President trump has a pad of 46 points that can go against him and still win.  That’s more electoral votes than in Pennsylvania, Wisconsin and Michigan combined.  That’s as much as Texas and Wisconsin combined.

So those are the rosiest projections.  Between now and Election Day a lot of bad things can happen.  But you would have to borrow a lot of trouble to assume at this point that the odds are against us.  The economy, the stupidity of the Democrats, the obvious falseness of all the Deep State machinations against the President’s administration all add up to an advantage at the polls.  The items like voter fraud and changing demographics all existed almost identically in 2016.  Plus, the president has energized his base and they are behind him 100%.  Even the independents are starting to break his way.  A lot can go wrong but right now is not the time for fretting.  The wind is at our backs and the prospects for even better things seem to be there.

 

The Pollsters Admit Trump Will Win With the Same Coalition

You can actually hear the pain in the author’s voice when he writes that the Midwest voters today are still the ones who elected President Trump in 2016 and they will elect him again in 2020.

https://cookpolitical.com/index.php/analysis/national/national-politics/its-2016-all-over-again

Sucks being a Dem presidential candidate or pollster this year too.

The Democrat Donors are Starting to Panic Over the 2020 Field of Candidates

The Big Money donors are a powerful force in Democrat politics and lately when they get together they can be heard saying, “isn’t there anyone better than this to bring into the race?”  Apparently the top three candidates, Biden, Warren and Sanders don’t inspire much confidence in the bag men.

And who can blame them?  Warren and Sanders are communists who, among other things, have signed onto healthcare proposals that promise to eliminate all private health insurance.  After the debacle of Obamacare even lefties know that the majority of Americans will view this as a deal breaker.  In addition, several of these donors represent the Tech Giants and Warren has been vowing to break up Google and Facebook so you can imagine they’re not thrilled with the prospect of paying through the nose for someone who wants to put them out of business.

And then there’s Creepy Uncle Joe.  Even if you refuse to believe that his crooked son was obviously cashing in on his father’s influence as Vice President during the Ukraine debacle it would be impossible to miss the fact that Joe is working with less than a full deck of cards at this point.  The money men are probably dreading the prospect of a general election debate between Joe the Human Gaffe Machine and the Trump Buzzsaw.

As for the rest of the field of midgets, none of them are polling above three percent in the polls.  And the ones that are even slightly less crazy than the front-runners are even lower down than three percent.  They’re in the fractional percentage range.

This has spawned panicky calls to draft Hillary Clinton, Michael Bloomberg, Michelle Obama, John Kerry or even Oprah Winfrey.

I fully expect that during this holiday season a call will go out to draft Santa Claus if he can be convinced to renounce Christianity.

This is a delicious moment.  With Hillary Clinton denouncing one of the candidates, Tulsi Gabbard, as a Russian agent I can imagine a scenario where the Trump campaign donates money to a Draft Hillary PAC to ensure she gets her chance to do the maximum damage to the whole Democrat establishment.

Seriously, many people thought that the 2020 Democrat field was a sacrificial offering intended to eliminate the old and insane to clear the decks for 2024.  If that is the case, mission accomplished.  If the general election turns out to be the debacle it’s shaping up to become, the Dems may rethink the whole resistance thing and put a brave face on a “loyal opposition” con.

But what isn’t clear is how much of a coattail effect President Trump can have in the House and Senate.  The Republican boobs in those two august bodies have proven themselves almost superhumanly capable of screwing up all of the opportunities that President Trump has presented them with over the course of his term.  I only hope that some much less-stupid people step forward and present themselves as allies of the President and thereby benefit from his popularity with real people.  Anyway, that’s what I hope.  But my fondest wish is that Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan go over to the Democrat side and help them with all the special skills they possess.  That should be enough to give us a supermajority in both houses of Congress.

 

 

22SEP2019 Update – The Dem Race Begins to Take Shape

So, this week we’ve lost Bill DeBlasio.  As the President mentioned, New York City is in a panic because Bill’s returning there and sure to cause fresh havoc in Gotham City.

And word has come down from Spartacus that unless his backers send him $1.7 million before September 30th, he’s going to drop his shield and short sword and drop out of the race.  Kind of makes you wonder a little about why he’s in the race.  What I want to know is who will keep the white supremacists in check if Cory drops out of the race.  I mean sure, Creepy Uncle Joe and Kamala Harris are woke to the threat of rampaging gun-wielding white fascists but Spartacus was the one who made it his signature issue.  And without a doubt Beto has laid claim to the gun grabbing title with his hats, coffee mugs and other branded paraphernalia but Spartacus was so much more real.  Yes, Cory Booker will be missed by those supremacists.

Today I read that Fauxcahantas has taken a two-point lead over Creepy Joe in Iowa.  Losing Uncle Joe so early in the process would be a blow.  The whole problem of his son and the Ukraine could spell the end of my prediction for Joe to be the November victim for President Trump.  So sad, so sad.  Well if it’s to be Fauxcahantas (and I’m not admitting to it yet) then let it be Fauxcahantas and Kamala Harris.  That is a dream ticket for President Trump.  Between the shrieks of Fauxcahantas and the whining and crying of Harris there wouldn’t be a man in America with a testosterone level above zero who would vote for that nightmare.  Now the flip side of that is every cat lady and power skirt in the country will try to vote twice for them.  But somehow, I don’t see them getting much of the female black vote.

Bernie is now only ahead of Warren in New Hampshire where he is shown trailing Joe by about a point.  But nationally the Fake Indian is leading him by a couple of points.  Bernie won’t drop out soon.  He’s got a lot of money and a loyal core of Bernie Bros who won’t desert him.

Pete Butt also has a good pile of cash to keep him going and the desire to be Vice President and I see him hanging in there for a good long time.  But as to who would select him for Veep, maybe Harris?  I’m guessing nobody really wants him aboard.

So, of the candidates who still might be around in a few weeks, that leaves Beto.  I think Harris would like to have him for a Veep.  He’s so incredibly shallow and stupid that by comparison even she would look sort of intelligent.  And he’s got a skateboard you know.  He’ll definitely get the poser and hipster vote motivated.

All the rest of the losers hovering around at 3% or lower will be gone by Halloween.  It’s pretty clear that the Media wants Creepy Uncle Joe to drop out.  They’re afraid that he’s too senile and has too many skeletons in his closet to beat the President.  And they’re right but honestly, it’s not as if Bernie or Fake Indian aren’t just as looney.  It’s that old white guy just seems impossible for their narrative.

Emotionally I’m tied to the idea of Creepy Uncle Joe going into the debates.  The spastic hilarity just draws me in.  But Fake Indian is great too.  Fauxcahantas has more than one arrow in her quiver if I may be permitted to use the metaphor.  She shrieks and her eyes bulge behind her Granny Clampett glasses and she gestures and gesticulates like some demented third grade teacher.  There is greatness there.

But never let it be said that I’m a fair-weather friend.  I’m sticking with Crazy Uncle Joe to the bitter end.  The only condition I put on his candidacy is if he strokes out.  If he does, I’ll pull support.  I can’t be responsible for the death of anyone, even Creepy Uncle Joe.

So, let’s recap.  With the Media and nervous big money pushing to anoint Fauxcahantas, Creepy Uncle Joe is hoping to weather the Ukraine thing while Bernie plods along waving the Hammer and Sickle flag of Communism for the Bernie Bros to see.  The only losers who’ll hang in for the Veep sweepstakes look like Harris, Beto, Mayor Pete Butt and maybe Spartacus.  I’m holding out for Uncle Joe but the vultures are beginning to circle.  Stay tuned for more excitement in October.

 

The Democrat Platform – Such as It Is in September 2019

We’re still a year out from the Democratic 2020 National Convention so it’s not entirely accurate to say we know what the platform will be for the Democrat Presidential election.  And it’s very likely that the nominee will backpedal like mad next year from some of the positions they all took at the recent debates.  But let’s look at where we are right now.

All the candidates are in favor of health care coverage for illegal aliens.  All want a Medicare for all program.  All of them want to empty out the prisons.  All of them want a multi-trillion-dollar slavery reparations law.  All of them want to seize guns from the populace.  All of them think that the only criminal activity that the police should concentrate on is white supremacists committing hate crimes.  All of them think President Trump is actually Hitler.

Isn’t that enough?  I think it is.

My bet is still that Biden will be the nominee.  From the Democrat’s point of view he is the least exciting candidate because he’s old and male and white.  But deep down in their hearts they know that as crazy as Creepy Uncle Joe is, he can’t hold a candle to the outright lunacy that lives in the likes of Elizabeth Warren or Bernie Sanders or Kamala Harris who back the Green New Deal initiative.  With this initiative, it’s not just that we’ll be wasting money so quickly that we might as well be heating our homes by burning hundred dollar bills it’s that we will be deprived of being able to drive our cars to get to work or heat our homes.  They will artificially raise the cost of hydrocarbon fuels to the point where we won’t be able to live where and how we want to.  Eventually you’ll have to live where mass transportation and public housing is provided and you’ll live under the laws that these Democrat jurisdictions vote for and you’ll have to let your kids be indoctrinated under the social programs endemic there.  Even Democrats don’t really want to live like that so in the deepest depths of their minds they know these candidates will go down in flames in the general election.

So, let’s assume it will be Joe, because these craziest kinds of policies will be non-starters in the general election.  Joe will paint his Medicaid for All as a voluntary program where “if you like your doctor, you can keep your doctor” (wink, wink, nudge, nudge).  And he will talk about how he likes to go duck hunting and reasonable gun control is as American as apple pie.  And he will assure us that the time has come to finally reach a conclusion to the suffering of black Americans from the after effects of slavery.  And that President Trump has enflamed the hearts of Americans with his intolerant rhetoric.

Well, I don’t think that any of that stuff compares to a good economy.  All President Trump has to do is remind voters that the last time they heard about health care from Obama and Biden they were handed Obamacare as the be all and end all of healthcare, a regular panacea that eliminated pre-existing condition requirements and covered everyone.  Ha!

And as far as enflaming hearts it won’t take much to remind them of burning police cars in Baltimore and the Black Lives Matters thugs shooting police officers down in the streets.  And Obama taking sides in the Treyvon Martin and Michael Brown cases despite the obvious evidence that neither of these men were victims of anything but their own criminality.

Biden is indeed the most likely candidate to come close for the Democrats.  He’ll use his connection to the Obama presidency to pump up the black vote and his moderate (for a Democrat) stances on some issues will scare off the least number of normal voters but I don’t think he’ll do all that well in the general election.  At least he shouldn’t.  There’s just too much video evidence of all the stupid and crazy positions he’s taken over the last few decades.  Think of some of these Obama-era skeletons being featured in a two-minute commercial.  And that’s not even counting the financial dirt that is out there with his son taking money from Ukrainian interests for influence peddling to the old man.  And finally, with the terrible performance Biden has displayed during the recent debates I can’t imagine that he will fare well against the President.  Therefore, unless the economy tanks, Joe’s toast.

So, my thought here is that the Democrat Platform and even the most moderate of the Democrat candidates may have finally reached the point where the American people have to just say no to them.  And that is a good thing.

 

Scenes From the Third Democrat Debate

Just for laughs I turned on the debate for about a half hour.  The free for all was shrieking about healthcare.  Every single one of the maniacs was jabbering about how his plan was better than their plans because their plans would leave millions dying from scurvy while his plan would guarantee eternal life and youth.  And most of them took the opportunity to kick poor old Creepy Joe in the in the family jewels for some especially awful shortcomings in his version of Medicare for all.  One especially bitter moment for Joe was when Yang called him out on some defect in his plan.  Joe answered that the defect didn’t exist but Yang countered that just minutes before Joe has sworn the opposite was true.  Poor Joe.  Somehow Obamacare wasn’t Barack’s fault but instead Joe’s.  Pretty remarkable.

The other section had to do with criminal justice.  Every candidate wanted to empty the prisons and use some kind of reparations bill to pay back criminals for being criminals.  The only criminals they didn’t like were white supremacists.  They apparently are the only real criminals in America.  And the reparations for African Americans cannot be big enough.  Apparently it will be an endless river of money that will never come close to solving the problem but it must be done anyway.  And the clowns all agreed that Donald Trump is indeed a white supremacist, racist, really, really bad guy.

At that point I thought I’d seen enough.  My only real hope is that all this is recorded for later use by the President’s re-election committee.  There were a thousand moments when any and all of those imbeciles made themselves transparently unfit to lead this country.  Their policies are impossible to implement from either a financial or a constitutional point of view and even if these policies could be enacted a majority of Americans will recognize them as at best unfair and at worst insane.

Think of it.  They want to empty the prisons.  What will that do to the ‘hood?  They want to provide universal healthcare.  Wasn’t that Obamacare?  Won’t this just be more degradation of the existing private system to spread the bad coverage that Obamacare already gave us?  And reparations.  We’re going to give trillions of dollars to one group of people, who for the last fifty years have been the recipients of affirmative action which allegedly isn’t enough, and we’ll obtain those trillions by taking them from people, most of whose ancestors weren’t even in America when slavery existed.  Would you vote for someone promising that?

I don’t know how many more debates there are but by the last one the candidates will be down to promising to burn the country to the ground just to make sure that everyone is absolutely equally miserable.  These folks are literally insane.  I’m guessing this should put an end to their 2020 hopes.  Either that or I’m crazy.

 

 

The Democrat Primary Field – Part 3 – Cory Booker

I better hurry this series along because the candidates are dropping like flies.  In addition to such household names as Seth Moulton, Eric Swalwell, John Hickenlooper, Jay Inslee and Mike Gravel this week we lost the vivacious and vacuous Kirsten Gillibrand.  I was hoping to feature the current holder of the Hillary Clinton Memorial Senate Seat from New York but alas it was not meant to be.  Ah, well.

So, let’s not waste our chance to review the work of Newark’s own Spartacus.  There’s no kind way to say this, he’s a doofus.  Now mind you, he’s a graduate of Stanford, a Rhodes Scholar, with a law degree from Yale.  So apparently, he’s a genius.  But listen to him speak.  He’s a certified doofus.  It’s remarkable, when forced to speak ex tempore, without his teleprompter, he stutters and spits out fragments of thoughts and phrases.  He was the mayor of Newark and claimed that he lowered the unemployment rate by two percent but a left leaning publication said it was actually 0.7%.  When he left the job for greener pastures, the atrocious high school dropout rate and city murder rate in Newark were both still sky high.  He’s the junior Senator from New Jersey and chances are he can keep that job in perpetuity with their voting record.  But honestly, he’s a pretty dim bulb.  But I want Cory to go as far in the contest as comically possibly.

Now, to be sure, I have a better chance of being the Democrat nominee in 2020 than Spartacus does.  There is no way the DNC would allow Cory to be offered up as a burnt offering to President Trump at a debate.  There wouldn’t be anything left.  My guess is after a round of questions or possibly two rounds, Cory’s eyes would be bulging out and he’d bolt for the exit.  As entertaining as that would be, I’m still holding out for Creepy Uncle Joe to get the nomination.  So, I’m of the opinion that Cory will drop out of the race, put on his khiton, strap on his sword and battle the Roman legions a Metapontum like the true vegan, straight male, Thracian gladiator that he is.  But he should last at least into round three of the Democrat debates so we have that to look forward to.  Is Tony Curtis still alive?  Maybe he can endorse him in a commercial that ends with his wonderful lisping tagline, “I love you Spartacus.”

 

The Democrat Primary Field – Part 2 – Elizabeth Warren

The Democrat Primary Field – Part 1 – Joe Biden

 

Being a transplant to New England I have sadly had a ringside seat for the Fauxcahantas, Liarwatha, Granny Clampett, Elizabeth Warren show.  And it has been a spectacle like few others.  But Massachusetts being Massachusetts even the spectacle of Snow White claiming to be Pocahontas did not deny her election to the United States Senate from the Bay State.  They do love their radicals.

Warren is actually the brain behind Obama’s famous “you didn’t build that” assault on entrepreneurs.  He lifted it wholly from a speech she gave in Andover Massachusetts that essentially said that every businessman used the roads and infrastructure that was paid for by all the citizens of the country. Therefore, his ownership of his own business was somehow illegitimate and he should have to pay through the nose to keep a part of what was his.  Her platform is tax the rich.  Free college, free stuff and debt forgiveness.  She’s basically Bernie in a pantsuit.

As communists go, she’s relatively glib.  She can string together sentences that sound reasonably coherent but when she gets started on one of her rants, she gets this manic look in her beady little eyes and it’s clear that she’s actually a pretty dangerous lunatic.  Still compared to the gibbering of Corey Booker or the whining of Kamala Harris or even the demented yammering of Biden she seems almost sane.  So, for that reason, and because of the belief that suburban white women will vote for her in droves many on the right fear her candidacy.  Now I don’t think she’ll get the nomination.  But I wish she would.  Why?  For the sheer joy of watching President Trump call her Fauxcahantas and Liarwatha and Chief Full of Bull.  Can you imagine?  I mean, I think there’s an outside chance she’ll stroke out if he starts laughing at her during a debate.  Think of the tweets.  Think of the rallies.  There would be endless war whoops and memes of Warren’s face on Cigar Store Indians and Indian Head Nickels and her on the warpath.  It’ll be heap big fun.

And Warren’s presidential run has been great for her most loyal torturer in chief Howie Carr.  He is a columnist for the Boston Herald and now that Whitey Bulger is dead “the Fake Indian” as he calls her is his favorite target.  Here’s his latest taunt.

So that’s Fauxcahantas.  She made her career by convincing Harvard Law that she was a lily-white woman of color.  Now she has to convince democrat voters that she can get Americans to believe that she’ll hand them over all the wampum they deserve.  Ugh.

 

The Democrat Primary Field – Part 1 – Joe Biden

Looking at the field in the Democratic 2020 Presidential Primary it’s remarkable to see just how many of these people are demonstrably unhinged.  And I’m looking beyond Marianne Williamson and Corey Booker who are beyond the pale when it comes to eccentricity.  But right now, I’d like to start with the front runner, Creepy Uncle Joe Biden.

First off, with all the gaffes and dead air during the debates is there any doubt that Joe has lost more than a step or two off his fighting prime?  If elected he would be older than Reagan was when he stepped down in 1989.  And that is definitely the least of his problems.

Joe Biden is captured on film during official government proceedings sidling up behind women, grabbing their shoulders and sniffing their hair, or putting his hands on their ribcages just slightly below their breasts.  Now, definitely, in the reign of Caligula this kind of behavior would have been down right benign from a comparative psychosexual perspective.  But today, unless you’re a character in an FBI behavioral science procedural drama you’re supposed to keep your hands off the other homo sapiens you’re not married to.  What creepy fetishistic process is going on in his head when he does these kinds of things in front of cameras?  Does he think he’s invisible or above the scrutiny of observers?  Are we supposed to think that he’s just that over enthusiastic old uncle who likes to hug everybody but doesn’t mean anything by it?  What must it have been like in the Biden home around Christmas time with all the young girl relatives doing a duck and cover every time they heard slipper-shod footsteps closing in from behind?  The mind boggles.

Joe has been a strange duck since always.  Back in 1988 when he ran for President the first time he was hounded by multiple charges of plagiarism and inaccurate statements about his academic record and forced to withdraw.  Now admittedly some of this was because that dweeb Dukakis was playing lawyer ball against his rivals.  But let’s face it, lying about your college record isn’t very smart.  Then there’s the hair plugs.  Anyway, Joe’s whole career is littered with lies, exaggeration and braggadocio but without any actual accomplishments.  In a way he is the perfect Democrat candidate.

But now Joe has to win the 2020 nomination and Joe’s dinosaur version of Democrat candidacy doesn’t mesh with the woke, #metoo, progressive politics.  He’s been attacked by Kamala Harris for working with the Southern Democrats back in the 1970s.  She accused him of trying to keep young Kamala from being bussed back in California.  And Corey Booker accused Joe’s 1990s crime bill of incarcerating the entire population of Newark, New Jersey.  Poor Joe.

Initially Joe had been dialing back his aggression toward his fellow candidates because of the politically correct requirements of an old white male Democrat defending himself from the diversity scrum that the Democrat debates have turned into lately.  Because of this, Joe has somewhat become a punching bag for the likes of Kamala Harris and Corey Booker.  But finally, he seems to have escaped from this situation and is now fighting back with such inspired zingers as, “Watch out kid!” and “Go easy on me kid!”  The interesting thing about the race is that Joe’s standing in the polls really hasn’t been lowered very much at all from the heavy pounding he took in the first and second debates.  According to the news reports on television and the newspapers Joe was slaughtered in each of those debates and should have plummeted precipitously in the polls from all these beatings.  But there he still stands, way ahead of his opponents.  Apparently, the voters recognize that he has promised the fewest impossible things and therefore is the least unelectable Democrat in the general election.  And as his numbers remain above theirs, the lowest tier candidates will begin the depressing thought process of when to pull the plug on their hopeless pursuit of the nomination.  In fact, former Colorado Governor Hickenlooper and California Representative Swalwell have already pulled the plug and now will join the ranks of bitter losers mumbling “2024” under their breaths and counting up the money they managed to add to their war chests this year.

Does Joe have access to the industrial strength fix that was “in” when Hillary was running against Bernie and the Bros?  That’s the million-dollar question.  Has Obama anointed Joe?  Seemingly not.  All the indications are that Obama is keeping his options open.  He probably knows that Joe is not as inspiring to the Hopey/Changey crowd as he was.  But even slipping into imbecility and marked with the sign of Cain, Creepy Joe should be able to beat Liarwatha and the rest of the midgets.  After all, each of them has incredible negatives too.  Granny Warren was a pretend Cherokee.  Kamala Harris slept her way to the top.  Mayor Pete was the mayor of a large town!  Corey Booker, well he’s Corey Booker.  He actually called himself Spartacus, on purpose!  Bernie is like a Commie version of Uncle Leo from the Seinfeld show.  Joe will beat these guys because he can pretend to be sane.  They can’t hide their crazy.  He’s the bull goose looney and will be the candidate.

But that’s as far as he’ll get.  The general election will be a slaughter of poor Sleepy Creepy Joe.  After all President Trump is no kid and definitely won’t go easy on Biden.  Sorry Joe.

So, here’s to you Joe, you creepy, sleepy, gropey son of a gun.  You may be nuts but you’re still the best of the bunch.  Long may you grab those shoulders and sniff that hair.

 

The Democrat Primary Field – Part 2 – Elizabeth Warren