President Trump (PT)\u00a0 –\u00a0 Oh my head.\u00a0 What the hell was in that lousy champagne they served last night at the Inaugural Ball?\u00a0 Tell that guy who provided the wine that he\u2019s fired!<\/p>\n
Vice President Pence (VPP) \u2013 That was the President of France, Mr. President.<\/p>\n
PT \u2013 Exactly.\u00a0 France is a loser country.\u00a0 Very low energy.\u00a0 We\u2019ll rename Quebec, New France and use them instead for wine and cheese.<\/p>\n
VPP \u2013 I don\u2019t think you can grow wine grapes in Quebec.<\/p>\n
PT \u2013 Then we\u2019ll rename Louisiana, New France!\u00a0 Stop making this difficult Mike.\u00a0 I don\u2019t want to have to ban you from the Oval Office.<\/p>\n
VPP \u2013 Yes Mr. President.<\/p>\n
PT -Okay, so now I\u2019m president what\u2019s next?<\/p>\n
VPP \u2013 Well, traditionally, you provide Congress with your list of cabinet appointees for them to approve and begin oversight of the executive branch.<\/p>\n
PT \u2013 How long does that take?<\/p>\n
VPP \u2013 At least a few weeks?<\/p>\n
PT \u2013 Weeks? And when do I fire all the Obama people and other people I don\u2019t like?<\/p>\n
VPP \u2013 Wouldn\u2019t it be better to wait until your people are in place? That would minimize the amount of confusion and make the transition smoother.<\/p>\n
PT – Smooth transition? Weeks of delay? Oh no, no, no, no, no. We need to shake these people up and put the fear of Trump into them. I\u2019m gonna clear these free-loaders out tomorrow.<\/p>\n
VPP \u2013 But you don\u2019t have any staff. How are you going to do all that?<\/p>\n
PT \u2013 Easy. You\u2019re gonna do it for me.<\/p>\n
VPP \u2013 But I don\u2019t have any staff yet either. What can I do?<\/p>\n
PT \u2013 You can type can\u2019t you? You know how to look up the executive branch on Wikipedia don\u2019t you? You\u2019re gonna write a letter to each of the cabinet level heads saying he\u2019s fired and I\u2019m gonna sign them. Then you\u2019re gonna write a letter to each of the department deputies and say if he doesn’t follow the executive orders I\u2019m about to issue that he too will be fired and I\u2019ll sign those. Then carbon copy the newspapers and media desks and send a copy to the joint chiefs of staff.<\/p>\n
VPP \u2013 What do I look like? Your secretary?<\/p>\n
PT \u2013 You got anything better to do Pence? Look, we don\u2019t have a lot of time if we\u2019re going to fix this government. I need to get things humming around here. If you don\u2019t want to help, then go over to the VP mansion and start writing your memoirs. I’ll put an ad in the Pennysaver and hire a high school kid who wants a job. And in four years I’ll make him my next vice president. But tell me quick if you want to help because I\u2019ve got a lot of work to do.<\/p>\n
VPP \u2013 Uh, I\u2019ll get my laptop and get started on the letters.<\/p>\n
PT \u2013 Good. That sounds a lot less weak than your excuses. Tell the kitchen to send up some sandwiches and coffee.<\/p>\n
VPP \u2013 Yes Mr. President.<\/p>\n
PT \u2013 Oh and tell the Secret Service to change the locks and passwords on all the doors. Melania\u2019s afraid that old pervert Biden will try to get back in and cop a feel.<\/p>\n
VPP \u2013 Yes Mr. President.<\/p>\n
[paypal-donation]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
President Trump (PT)\u00a0 –\u00a0 Oh my head.\u00a0 What the hell was in that lousy champagne they served last night at the Inaugural Ball?\u00a0 Tell that<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mi_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,288,6],"tags":[168,16],"class_list":["post-344","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-current-events","category-humor","category-trump","tag-humor","tag-trump"],"yoast_head":"\n