Someone who saw my promotion posts on X left a comment showing interest in reading the book so I asked him to share his thoughts on the story if he got a copy.\u00a0 So far, he\u2019s read the first three chapters and I find his candid thoughts very interesting.<\/p>\n
\u201cHi! I am currently in the middle of chapter 3. Feel free to take my opinions with a grain of salt, by the way.<\/strong><\/p>\n The first two scenes were excellent. I felt completely drawn into the action, and it was easy to visualize. This is Jeffrey Haskell level of quality, which is a high bar.<\/strong><\/p>\n Once they get on the plane, however, it feels like an information dump, and the dialog becomes stilted. There are a couple of reasons for this. None of the revelations about Connor have been foreshadowed, so they feel as if they were drawn out of thin air. You don’t have to foreshadow everything, but it helps if you foreshadow something so that the reader feels connected to the exposition.<\/strong><\/p>\n More important, there is very little feeling behind the information dump. Connor considers himself in debt to Bogey, but the rescue was incidental to Bogey’s job. There was nothing personal about it. As a result, it doesn’t seem worth a potentially $10 million gift.<\/strong><\/p>\n The third chapter has a more serious problem. We are learning a lot about Connor’s business, but we have no idea why. To pull a reader in, you need to have some idea of what the reader is hoping to see and give a sense we are moving in that direction. Reading chapter 3, all I feel is I want the action to begin again. There is no compelling reason for me to pay attention to Connor’s business plan, since I have no idea how it fits into the story.<\/strong><\/p>\n In any case, I thought I should give you my impressions while they are still fresh in my mind. I am hoping the action starts again soon, as you are very good at that.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n So, what I\u2019m hearing is that the information dumps are an impediment to enjoying the story as an action story.\u00a0 What I\u2019m taking away is that stories in the various action genres have a short window between the kinetic parts of the story.\u00a0 Now that is interesting because it means the author has to balance providing background information with keeping the reader\u2019s interest.\u00a0 For me that\u2019s tricky.\u00a0 With a science fiction story bringing the audience into the technical details of the \u201cworld\u201d are sort of important.\u00a0 But the reviewer has made his point.\u00a0 If I put him to sleep or even lose his interest in the world-building then he\u2019s not going to finish the book.\u00a0 Now I did start the book with two scenes he really liked but both of those scenes are remote in time from the \u201cpresent\u201d action (one is years before and one is a year or so after the triggering event of the main plot).\u00a0 So, in a way I paying for some of my sins against continuity.<\/p>\n Well, now I\u2019m really interested in his ideas about Chapter 4.\u00a0 It\u2019s got action but it\u2019s of a singularly depressing type.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Someone who saw my promotion posts on X left a comment showing interest in reading the book so I asked him to share his thoughts<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mi_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[241,1289,1263,237,4,242],"tags":[1290,5205],"class_list":["post-38155","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-book-reviews","category-fiction-by-me","category-stuff-that-personally-interests-me-miscellaneous","category-reviews","category-sff","category-sff-book-reviews","tag-my-fiction","tag-the-sniper"],"yoast_head":"\n