{"id":5724,"date":"2019-01-02T22:59:01","date_gmt":"2019-01-03T03:59:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/orionscoldfire.com\/?p=5724"},"modified":"2019-01-02T23:05:42","modified_gmt":"2019-01-03T04:05:42","slug":"he-man-woman-haters-club-or-the-royal-order-of-raccoons","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/orionscoldfire.com\/index.php\/2019\/01\/02\/he-man-woman-haters-club-or-the-royal-order-of-raccoons\/","title":{"rendered":"He-Man Woman Haters Club or the Royal Order of Raccoons?"},"content":{"rendered":"

As is my way I\u2019m trying to come up with the name of something before the something even exists.\u00a0 I\u2019ve become intrigued with the idea of starting a fraternal order that would provide a place for people like me to feel at home.\u00a0 Both of the names in the title are imaginary societies that appeared in popular tv shows when I was a kid.\u00a0 The He-Man Woman Haters Club<\/a> was where the Little Rascals congregated when they were having trouble with Darla or the other girls in the neighborhood and the Racoon Lodge<\/a> is where Ralph and Ed retreated to when Alice and Trixie were nagging them about the dumpy apartments, they lived in.\u00a0 Of course, these names may be under copyright protection but any name will do as long as the ground rules are right.<\/p>\n

Rule 1 \u2013 All voting members will be married men.\u00a0 They have to be men because women are a nuisance.\u00a0 They have to be married because wisdom only comes through suffering and no one suffers as much as married men.\u00a0 Unmarried men are welcome but cannot vote.<\/p>\n

Rule 2 \u2013 All memberships will be approved by me based on interviews and recommendations of people I can vouch for.\u00a0 Memberships can be revoked any time someone stops fitting the membership criteria.\u00a0 I decide the criteria and can change them anytime I deem it necessary.\u00a0 It\u2019s a flexible system and should prove robust.<\/p>\n

Rule 3 \u2013 The women\u2019s auxiliary is made up exclusively of wives who can make sandwiches.\u00a0 They have no standing in the organization other than to assist the members, cheer at sporting events, chaperone children\u2019s activities and make sandwiches (and other designated foodstuffs).\u00a0 If any wife becomes a nuisance she will be ejected and her husband will be liable for the offense up to and including expulsion.\u00a0 Girlfriends of unmarried members can join the auxiliary but must get along with the wives.\u00a0 Any member who has a wife and a girlfriend will have to sort that out himself.<\/p>\n

Rule 4 \u2013 All children\u2019s activities must be chaperoned by the parents or legal guardians of the children attending.\u00a0 This is key.\u00a0 People should care enough to spend time with their kids.\u00a0 If you don\u2019t want to why would we?<\/p>\n

Rule 5 \u2013 No member can openly espouse Democrat, progressive, communist, socialist, globalist, anti-American or any other pinko sentiments.\u00a0 You can be an atheist if you refrain from annoying religious people about it.\u00a0 The organization is innately pro-God because God has always done right by me.\u00a0 But we are not denominational.\u00a0 God only talks to me when I\u2019m alone and won\u2019t allow me to tell anyone else what religion he belongs to.\u00a0 Sorry.<\/p>\n

Rule 6 \u2013 Men will wear pants at all times.\u00a0 This is very important.\u00a0 We are Americans and American men wear pants.\u00a0 End of story.\u00a0 You Scots are out of luck.<\/p>\n

Rule 7 \u2013 Whenever in the course of a meeting or in organizational documents a pronoun is used for a person of indeterminate sex the masculine form will be used.\u00a0 If this bothers you then you\u2019re in the wrong club.<\/p>\n

Other rules equally idiosyncratic will follow as I get around to making them up.\u00a0 Suffice it to say that I will provide rules to prevent all the behaviors that annoy me in everyday politically correct arenas.\u00a0 No make-believe pronouns, no gender equality, no weirdos of any kind (other than my kind of weirdos).<\/p>\n

I am openly soliciting a name for this noble fraternal organization.\u00a0 And if you can think of anything that needs to be added to the rules or if you have other comments, such as, \u201cyou must be insane!\u201d then just leave them in the comment section below.<\/p>\n

Yours in fraternal benevolence,<\/p>\n

photog (AKA, the High, Exalted, Mystic Grand Master General)<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

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As is my way I\u2019m trying to come up with the name of something before the something even exists.\u00a0 I\u2019ve become intrigued with the idea<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mi_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,818,1263],"tags":[1641,1638,1639,1640,1642,732],"class_list":["post-5724","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-current-events","category-ocf","category-stuff-that-personally-interests-me-miscellaneous","tag-fraternal-organization","tag-he-man-woman-haters-club","tag-little-rascals","tag-racoon-lodge","tag-royal-order-of-racoons","tag-the-honeymooners"],"yoast_head":"\nHe-Man Woman Haters Club or the Royal Order of Raccoons? - Orion's Cold Fire<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/orionscoldfire.com\/index.php\/2019\/01\/02\/he-man-woman-haters-club-or-the-royal-order-of-raccoons\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"He-Man Woman Haters Club or the Royal Order of Raccoons? 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