Alfalfa, Call the Roll

Donald Trump signed an executive order that specified that the United States federal government only recognizes two sexes; male and female and these equate to the sexes identified by the biological realities of nature.  And he used this basis to forbid biological males from participating in Title IX protected women’s sports.  This provides a basis for activities excluding one sex from the other based on differences in biological identity.  So that’s part one.

But now it’s time to move forward.  Now it’s time to acknowledge that there should be activities that males want to participate without women involved.  And once again, it is based on biology.  It’s very simple.  Women are inherently irritating to men.

Now, I say this as a man whose been married to the same woman for forty-eight years.  This May I’ll have known Camera Girl for fifty years.  She is a delightful woman.  Smart, pretty, wise, witty; you name it.  She is the greatest joy of my whole existence on this planet.  But there are times when I get together with the guys that having her there would be a big mistake.  She’s a woman.  She’s not as lazy as we are.  Or as crass.  And she doesn’t care about nuclear weapons, the Roman Empire, the Lord of the Rings, William Shatner, bad movies in general or anything that would qualify her for a get together with the guys.  And if she did care about those things she would be too strange a woman for me to get involved with.

And even if she was still the same wonderful person she is now and wanted to hang out with the guys, it still would be a bad idea.  And that’s because men occasionally want to escape the company of women.  We want to be unfair and objectivize women and say things about them that they won’t like.  Basically, we want the space and freedom to act like thirteen-year-old boys again.  We want to form our own hierarchies based on whatever primitive and undemocratic criteria we decide on and we absolutely, positively don’t want to fall under the authority of a woman.  Now that’s clear enough.  We want our space.

Now how do we get it back?

It seems to me; the most logical way is to follow reason and fact.  If the Title IX laws protecting separate (but unequal) women’s programs is constitutional then it stands to reason that separate organizations based on the differences between men and women is also constitutional.  Fraternal organization can become just that again.  And sororal clubs can provide women with their own spaces.

Now whether any of the male organizations that have already been neutered by the government can be resuscitated is highly doubtful.  The Boy Scouts of America have just this month officially eliminated the word “boy” from their name.  I don’t see how that damage can be undone.  But new organizations can be started that will replace these hollowed out shells of the past.

And the time to make this happen is now.  With this Supreme Court and President Trump in charge the Justice Department could be the conduit for cases to push for the return of freedom of association.  The only real question is whether there is an organization that would be willing to be the test case.  It should be a new organization that starts fresh and goes after landmark legislation to end the present persecution of male only activities.

And I think the perfect test case should be my own favorite named organization; The He-Man Woman Hater’s Club.  The name says it all.  Now all we have to do is get that feminist Republican jurist on board; John Roberts.