Over the course of the post-Reagan republican clown parade we have seen many sorry excuses for conservatives. And from where I was watching the Bushes were not even the worst of them. Now, don’t get me wrong. I think that George Herbert Walker Bush was the political equivalent of the Civil War’s General Burnside. Burnside was a general so disastrously incompetent that during the closing days of the Civil War upon hearing of his latest battlefield disaster Lincoln was alleged to have said that “Only Burnside could have managed such a coup, wringing one last spectacular defeat from the jaws of victory.” I do not make this comparison idly. Here is a man who was handed the presidency on a silver platter from Ronald Reagan’s hands and in only four years lost it to a combination of Ross Perot and the trailer trash chasing Governor of Arkansas, Bill Clinton. Yes, the Bushes have much to be ashamed of as fake conservatives. And the outpouring of stupidity they have provided during and since the 2016 election only confirms their terrible political skills and lack of the common touch.
Or, I could wax poetic about that “maverick,” that “Reagan foot soldier,” John McCain but his health status makes me squeamish about pummeling him with the truth. We could talk about !JEB! We could talk about W. But without a doubt the worst example of republican empty suit syndrome is Willard Mitt Romney. The whole country has had a chance to enjoy Mittens during his disastrous attempt at the presidency. The Press had a field day with the photo of his dog riding in a crate on top of the family SUV and the infamous “binders full of women” shows how unable this man was to confront even the most inept partisan attacks against him. And his craven supine caving to Democrat and MSM demands that he turn on Trump during the election was pure Romney gold.
But in order to really see Mitt at his best you had to live in Massachusetts during the time when Romney tried challenging Ted Kennedy for his senate seat and then later during Romney’s tenure as Governor of the Bay State. During his senate campaign he said, “I believe that abortion should be safe and legal in this country.” Now this is a Mormon making this statement. The official Mormon stance on abortion says, “Human life is a sacred gift from God. Elective abortion for personal or social convenience is contrary to the will and the commandments of God. Church members who submit to, perform, encourage, pay for, or arrange for such abortions may lose their membership in the Church.” As a mitigating circumstance you could say that in a liberal state like Massachusetts anyone not claiming a pro-choice position had no chance of gaining elective office. And the answer to that would be that a Mormon shouldn’t run for elective office in Massachusetts.
But Mitt had any number of pratfalls in Massachusetts. While Governor his administration was blamed for some tiles falling from the ceiling of the newly built Big Dig tunnel and killing a passing driver. Now the tunnel was built by the various crooked business interests that flourished under the Democratic Massachusetts House and Senate leaders who doled out the contracts as patronage rewards and squandered the federal funds and the State taxes used. But Mitt took the blame with never a peep and almost seemed to enjoy the abuse that was heaped on him by the various rats in the legislature and press who better than anyone knew who was really to blame for the shoddy construction and outrageous price tag of the Big Dig. And this is the real shame of the GOPe. They never fight. They just sit there and take it. And even worse, they attack anyone who dares to fight back. Instead of applauding Trump for defending himself they go out of their way to virtue signal to the press that they are more outraged than the Democrats at the shameless refusal to kowtow to scurrilous attacks. “How dare Trump not cower like a true republican!”
But it appears the jig may be up. In the last few months even the most dependably invertebrate members of the GOPe seem to be figuring out that you actually can beat the MSM game. After seeing what happens when they work together with President Trump even such weak-kneed arthropods as Lindsey Graham are jumping on the Trump bandwagon and benefitting from the realization that acting like a man is possible for a republican. Can you imagine what would happen if they survive the midterms without losing either chamber, maybe even making gains?
I’m almost afraid of what this trend could portend. Will we see the likes of Lindsey Graham parading around the Senate floor sporting gold chains and flashing gang signs and talking trash about D’s who got curb stomped by the Notorious DT? Man, I hope not. But if we do, I only hope Romney doesn’t catch it too. The image of Mitt with a gold grill and twin glocks would probably finish me off, laughing.