We Lost Joe!  Is Kamala Safe?

America is coming unhinged.  Suddenly we’re told by the Media that Joe Biden must drop out of the race for president because, supposedly, he had a bad debate.  What bad debate?  His performance was masterful.  He was sharp as a tack.  And he came up with that winning slogan for the campaign, “We finally beat Medicaid.”  I mean, that was world class.  Sure, he had some small slips of the tongue about trillionaires and COVID instead of healthcare but that’s just because he was so excited to tell the American people the good news about Biden-omics and how they were actually making money every time they go to the grocery store or gas station.  I mean, he really does pass a cognitive test every day.  Well, most days anyway.

So some MAGA Republican shills like Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer and Barack Obama staged a coup and forced poor Scranton Joe to drop out just when he was really getting started.  That was hard to watch.  Very hard to watch.  And I’m not even sure it really happened.  Maybe that was a deep fake of Joe conceding the race.  It didn’t sound like him.  He said billionaires instead of trillionaires and he didn’t call Donald Trump his vice president.  The whole thing is very suspicious.

But we can’t undo the past.  Joe’s gone.  He’s probably consoled himself with so much ice cream at this point that he won’t be able to move or speak until October, so the election is gone for him.  What I’m worried about is the same thing happening to Kamala Harris.  What if they run a coup against her?  I don’t care how unburdened she is by the past, if Obama, Schumer and Pelosi show up at her front door in the middle of the night and tell her that she has to step down “for the good of the country,” that good-hearted gal Kamala will sacrifice herself.

But she shouldn’t!

They’ll tell her she’s not popular enough to be elected.  They’ll tell her that giving forty-minute speeches about yellow school buses isn’t a winning strategy.  They’ll tell her that long solipsistic discussions about obvious facts aren’t a winning strategy.  They’ll tell her that replying to a pointed accusation about her painfully long list of failures with a maniacal laugh isn’t a winning strategy.

Who are these people telling her these things.

Well, sure, they’re the election professionals that she’s paying to help her win.  But maybe they’re also MAGA Republican shills who work for Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer and Barack Obama.  Don’t let them “biden” you, Kamala!  You’re better than that.

But even though you’re better than that, don’t let them talk you into a debate with Donald Trump.  Don’t do it.  Donald Trump doesn’t love yellow school buses.  He is completely burdened by what has been.  And he won’t be laughing.

He’s going to blame the border crisis on you.  Even though there is no border crisis.  He’s going to say that you were the “border czar” even though there’s no such thing.  And besides he’s Vladimir Putin’s friend and Putin really is the czar of all the Russias!

And Donald Trump is going to blame the urban crime on you because of the “defund the police” statements that you may (or may not) have made.

In other words, Donald Trump will be using disinformation against you if you agree to debate him.  So don’t you do it babe.  Your best bet is to stay put at the Vice-Presidential residence and don’t answer the door.  It could be a trick.  It could be Jake Tapper, Tucker Carlson or Donald Trump or it could be Pelosi, Schumer and Obama just waiting to catch you in a trap about dropping out for the good of the country.  Well, don’t fall for it.

So, if Kamala will just take my advice and stick to her basement until after COVID, I mean Election Day, she will be elected by a landslide and Donald Trump will stay in prison for a thousand years.  But stay away from the vanilla ice cream, Kamala.  I think it can rot your brain.  And you can’t afford it.