Don’t You Let Them Clarence, Don’t You Let Them!

Men and women are fundamentally different.  We interact with the world and each other in different ways.  We have different takes on almost everything.  Probably God will have to provide two different versions of heaven; one for men and one for women.  But the confusing aspect is how men and women (for example a husband and wife) will get to see each other in the afterlife.  Will we be separated for eternity?  That seems odd.  And yet neither group would think it was in heaven if heaven corresponded to what the opposite sex imagined for heaven.

For instance, for Camera Girl, heaven would be the place where I would constantly admit that she had been right about some piece of advice or other.  And for me heaven would be that place where she anticipated all of my requests ahead of time and sandwiches and coffee were endlessly available.  And she never questioned my infallible judgement.

It’s a seeming paradox.

But on reflection I remember that God is male so I have to assume that in the afterlife women will be given the grace to recognize that they’ve been wrong all along and now feel celestial joy in finally appreciating the truth and gratitude toward men for putting up with their illogical thinking all of these millennia.

There is an old movie with William Powell called “Life with Father.”  It takes place in 1880s New York City and Powell is Clarnece Day Senior, a prosperous stock broker and the patriarch of a family of four sons.  His wife Vinny is a cheerful, well-meaning woman whose lack of financial ability drives Clarence to distraction whenever he tries to keep control over the household budget.

Toward the end of the movie, Clarence is attempting to explain women to his son Clarence Junior who is eighteen.  He says, “Clarence understanding women is very difficult.  They think …  No, I’m wrong already.  They don’t think at all.  What they do is get stirred up!  And they get stirred up about almost anything.  But don’t you let them try to confuse you.  Don’t you let them.”

And Clarence Day Senior was entirely correct.  They get stirred up.  And when they do logic and normalcy go out the window.  Of course, in 1880 women were forty years away from getting the vote and the possibility of good governance and sanity were still a possibility.

I often think about who these male morons were who voluntarily voted for women to get the franchise.  Exactly how stupid must they have been?  I assume they were communists of one stripe or another.  But even communists couldn’t have wanted the chaos and confusion that female voting would surely bring.  But here we are.

Being an optimist, I still look forward to the day when an amendment to reverse women’s suffrage passes.  After all it goes hand in hand with the amendment for reversing prohibition.  That was after people saw how much damage it had done and the damage done by prohibition pales in comparison to what women voting has done.  Think of all the awful candidates, almost exclusively Democrats have been elected because women got stirred up.  Women voting was almost responsible for electing Hillary Clinton and Kamala Harris to the presidency.  And surely even women can see how disastrous those administrations would have been.

But as optimistic as I am I fear it will take some really catastrophic result of woman voting to convince them to voluntarily give up the vote.  So, it is a somber optimism.  But that’s the way of the world.  We must be patient.

Fiscal Madness and Buffalo Bill

So last week I was shoveling snow and now I read that it’s going to be 80 degrees on Saturday.  That’s messed up.  But this is Dunwich and we’ve never restricted ourselves to reality.  Okay, I’ve been griping about the cold weather so I better shut up and enjoy it.  And I will.  We’re hosting Easter on Sunday and that will be pretty great.  We have Princess Sack of Potatoes here tonight.  Her parents are celebrating an occasion and we gladly invited her over.  Tonight, she watched “Stuart Little.”  I was busy but I popped in and saw a few minutes of the movie here and there.  Geena Davis is one of the main characters and later on I saw Dabney Coleman playing a minor character.  And that activated a very old brain cell.  I recalled that a very young and pretty Geena Davis was the eye candy on a tv show that starred Dabney Coleman as the eponymous “Buffalo Bill.”  He was the host of a tv talk show and she was one of the production assistants.  I remember one episode where Bill explained to her that once a woman reached the age of twenty-five, she was over the hill and her face began to disintegrate.  When Geena asked whether this applied to men, the much older Bill said something like, “No, as unfair as it may seem, men remain pretty much the same decade after decade maybe even getting more handsome over time.”  His deadpan delivery, in your face offensiveness and outrageous non sequiturs were what made the show fun.

Tomorrow Camera Girl will continue the Princess’s training in the mysteries of holiday cooking.  She will assist in the baking of a ricotta cheese cake and various other Easter dishes.  The main course is roast beast and even in the midst of my endless drive to lose weight I will indulge to a greater extent than usual because, who are we kidding?  That’s not something you pass up in this age of $12/dozen eggs.

I was talking to one of my sons-in-law tonight about saving money.  He’s got two kids that will be in college next year and we were discussing automobiles.  His two main vehicles have 200,000+ miles each and I asked him how much he wants to get out of them.  He said 500,000!  Now if it weren’t him, I’d have scoffed at the idea.  These are American vehicles.  They don’t last that long.  But he’s an extremely capable mechanic.  He’s worked on everything from helicopters to lawn mowers and I’ve seen him bring piles of junk back to life so I just nodded my head and said, “Yeah we’ve all got to keep what we already have on the road as long as possible.”

I was at a Dunwich committee meeting.  The talk was what is going on in the state.  The Democrats are all freaked out.  They claim that Trump’s austerity measures will force them to declare a fiscal emergency and ignore all rules against excessively increasing taxes and other revenue sources.  They’re calling Trump a fascist, a Nazi, you name it.  Needless to say, the towns will be the ones taking the biggest hit.  All of the state mandates will become unfunded mandates and we’ll have to pay for them on our own.  At the end of the meeting, we all looked around and you could see everyone was thinking the same thing, “It is what it is.”  We all shrugged our shoulders and walked out.  Well, I’ll enjoy Easter and then we’ll take it day by day.  Ah, New England.

16APR2025 – Wednesday Coffee Walk Zoom Call – To Boldly Go Where No Hag Has Gone Before

It’s always good talking to the boys.  What will be the topic for the week?  What will be the funniest or the craziest or the most annoying topic for the Left?  There were several candidates; NYC subway necrophilia, General Flynn’s call for Obama’s arrest and NY AG Leticia James’ real estate fraud scandal.  But everyone’s favorite by a lot was “Leftist Hags in Space!”  We all got a good laugh out of the likes of Gayle King, Bezos’ fiancée Lauren Sanchez, washed up pop star Katy Perry and nobodies Aisha Bowe, Kerianne Flynn and Amanda Nguyen squealing around on top of a comically phallic “Blue Origin” rocket that rose to an unimpressive 62 miles above Earth and then parachuted back.  The whole roundtrip took place within a ridiculously short 12 minutes.

This all female “crew” followed in the footsteps of 90+ year old fake rocket man James T Kirk, (AKA William Shatner) as he also failed to reach Earth orbit in the painfully underpowered suborbital rocket.  It was the opinion of all on the zoom call that a better effect could have been achieved if Bezos had instead equipped the ship with a female crew composed entirely of professional strippers.  There was disagreement as to whether weightlessness was a problem or a bonus from the point of performance.  Also, it was debated whether a stripper pole would be a safety hazard in the “cockpit.”

I noticed Camera Girl looking disapprovingly at me as she walked by at this point during the zoom call but free speech is a cherished right of the coffee walk tradition so I ignored the implied censorship and laughed along with the rest of the jackasses.  Ah, good times.

So, we compared the press coverage of this absurdly unimpressive publicity stunt and compared it to Space-X planning and executing a critical rescue of actual astronauts from the orbiting space station where Boeing’s failure stranded them for over half a year.  Basically, other than Fox News the rest of the media performed a virtual black out of the Space-X mission while the Bezos stunt was given 24/7 coverage by all the news stations as if it were something worthy of discussion.

And it’s impossible not to come to the conclusion that Jeff Bezos has managed to make space travel uncool.  Now I’ll qualify this.  Suborbital rocket flight is not really space-travel.  It’s really just air travel of a very inconvenient and useless kind.  But he has managed to attach a taint to rocket flight which I wouldn’t have thought possible.  And I should have expected nothing less from the founder of Amazon.com.  After all, the company who has his annoying trucks delivering things at my house seemingly before I order them would obviously be able to make rocket ships annoying too.

Well, I can always hope that the next all female crew will be Democrat politicians.  Let’s say Nancy Pelosi, AOC, Hillary Clinton and Maxine Waters.  Put all four of them in blue jumpsuits and at least for ten minutes I can hope against hope for some real excitement.  Engine, O-ring, parachute, whatever.