Tag: Disney
A No-Review Review of the Little Mermaid Remake
Matt Walsh gives an amusing review of Disney’s remake of A Little Mermaid by comparing it to Burger King. Personally I think he’s unfair to Burger King in this comparison. But I did enjoy his rant. It was well ranted.
One of the new Little Mermaid songs has gone viral…and words cannot capture how terrible it is.
If in one day I heard this song, my house burned down, I lost my job, & was diagnosed w/ a terminal illness, the song would still be the worst thing that happened to me that day. pic.twitter.com/oj5gc6awjW
— The Matt Walsh Show (@MattWalshShow) May 30, 2023
Disney Reviving Firefly? Possible? Preferable?
I stumbled across this video about whether Disney was planning to revive the Science Fiction series Firefly with the original cast. Even after watching this discussion I wondered if this thing is just clickbait.
Sure, there are millions of Firefly fans who would love to see the show resurrected. But how could it be done. From what I’ve read Joss Whedon has been #MeToo’ed out of Hollywood or something and it’s been twenty years since the show went off the air and the lead is involved in a successful tv series.
But put that aside. Suppose that it could be done. Suppose Nathan Fillion and the rest of the cast and Joss Whedon and his creative team from the original series could be reunited. There remains the question of whether it should be done. And by that I mean could Disney be trusted not to sabotage the whole thing by doing what they’ve done to Star Wars, The Avengers and every other intellectual property they buy?
I’ve got to be honest. I think they’d ruin it. Someway, somehow they’d corrupt the whole thing with the poison that they seem compulsively driven to inject in all their products. They’d have Malcolm Reynolds discovering that he was a victim of whiteness and Zoe would have to become captain to atone for his sins. And Jayne would end up transgendered and River would become a social justice warrior and Kaylee would have to go lesbian just to make the math work.
No, Disney should never try to bring Firefly back. If Whedon were able to buy the intellectual property back and do it without interference there might be a chance of it turning out decent. He could write some interesting stories for his world. But Disney would murder it. And that shouldn’t be done. Let that special place exist in the past. We can visit anytime we want with our dvds or streamed or on some network that loves good stories. But don’t give it to the soulless hacks at Disney. It deserves better than that.
Woke Disney Kids’ Movie with Gay Teen Love Interest Crashes and Burns on the Runway
I think I know why Disney brought Iger back. They just launched a movie that cost more than $180 million and will be lucky if it makes twenty percent of that back. Listen:
““Strange World,” is bombing, grossing a disappointing $4.2 million on Wednesday as it eyes a five-day haul of under $24 million. That’s a terrible result for the $180 million-budgeted animated adventure. For comparison sake, “Encanto,” another recent Disney animated offering, earned $40.3 million over the Thanksgiving holiday in 2021 — and that was considered to be a soft result for the family film.”
Here’s why. This is one of the plot lines in this “kid’s movie.”:
“Ethan Clade, Searcher’s 16-year-old gay son longs for adventure beyond his father’s farm while also navigating a school crush. One year later, Ethan is in a relationship with Diazo.”
What mother or father of eight- to twelve-year-olds doesn’t want to explain to his kids why two boys on the screen are acting like girls and gushing over each other. Why would that make parents stay away in droves? Disney warned us this is what they wanted to do. But most of us assumed they were just talking. No one thought they could be this stupid. We were wrong.
So, I went over to Rotten Tomatoes to see what people were saying. The professional reviews said it was the greatest thing since sliced bread. But the customer reviews were full of things like this:
“jonathon b: Stop bringing homosexual things into kids movies. Kids these days have it hard enough and do not need that influence in their lives.
firedup33: We walked out of the movie! Disney is trying to indoctrinate children with this evil movie! Do not spend one penny on anything Disney. Boycott them! It should not be rated PG should be rated as Highway to Hell!
Sana W: Awful!!! Walked out of it with my kids! I will never watch another Disney movie!
Xander C: Lets put it this way. My little boys asked me to walk out of the theater. They said the movie was weird, and asked me why the “boy” in the movie was acting kind of girly. I should have learned my lesson after the lightyear movie. Disney, my family is DONE with you.
Anonymous: Do not take young kids to this. I had no idea how woke this movie was. Unless you want to explain homosexuality to a your young children, avoid at all costs. My child asked me in the movie “why are the boys acting that way?” I am DONE with Disney in all forms.
Gerrixx O: I want my money back… I’m not sure if it was bad or just boring. I’m tired of being preached at and I’m a minority many times over. JUST MAKE GOOD MOVIES… we don’t need to see a salad, we have imaginations unlike the people at Disney.
Stephanie A: Absolutely terrible, if I want to teach my children about sex and or sexual preferences at 7 and 8 I would do it in my home. I don’t need a Disney movie to help me out with it. STOP making everything sexual, its unbelievable. Nothing in the trailer would lead you to believe that this is in the movie. I will no longer take my children to a Disney movie without reading reviews. Nothing is safe anymore, school, movies, internet (not that, that was ever safe), etc.. So disappointing!!!!
Anonymous: I wish I would have read the reviews before wasting mine and my daughters time on this movie. It’s my choice as a parent to decide if I want my children to know about same sex relationships. Even with this world evolving I never expected Disney to shove it at my children during a kids movie. I’m very disappointed that Disney feels like they have to evolve with this world. Stand out use your voice and don’t try to be like all the rest. Stick to the the wholesome family friendly movies….Walt Disney would be ashamed.
Linda: I went along with my daughter and two young grandchildren to see this movie. After seeing this movie, we will never take them to see another Disney movie again. Disney was trying so hard to be politically correct, they failed miserably to create a good family, classic movie as so many in past years. Don’t waste your money on this one, it is destined to be a Disney flop!!!
Adrian P: Haven’t seen the movie yet but I’m violently homophobic
Kelly: Last Disney movie I will waste my money on. As a parent I would like to be the one to talk to my child about same sex relationships. Way out of line for a childrens movie.
Jessie M: Easily the worst Disney animated movie. I liked 1 character hense the half star. But it’s like Disney went out of their way to make every single scene a cringy woke competition from the last.
Olga: So disappointed with Disney. I love Disney movies but not this one. The story line and plot was terrible. Lots of messages being sent that are confusing and not good for young children. Half the auditorium left the movie. Poor Disney. They can do better than this.”
This is so great. There’s nothing like a nine-digit financial loss to really catch a corporate board’s attention. They booted that dullard Bob Chapek out so fast that he’s probably still bouncing down the road. Now Bob Iger, who is probably twice as woke, has to figure out a way to reverse the disastrous path he launched the company on without triggering the LGBTQ gestapo to denounce him.
This is so great. Instead of “We Don’t Talk About Bruno,” it’ll bring new meaning to “Don’t Say Gay.” Maybe they can persuade Ron DeSantis to give them some pointers on how to effectively say no to the gay mafia. After this movie debacle Disney is going to have to have a string of successes just to catch up.
I’ve heard that G-rated kids movies have been known to make money. Hey maybe they could make some of those. If they need a template there used to be a company that made such hits as Snow White, Dumbo, Old Yeller, Swiss Family Robinson, Mary Poppins, Cinderella and on and on and on.
Oh, I forgot. Disney isn’t allowed to make movies like those anymore. They don’t reflect diversity, equity and inclusion. They’re not who we are. Too bad. Well, good luck selling deviant sex to the parents of young children. While you’re at it you might as well include puberty blockers and genital amputation to the plot lines and cover all the bases.
Well, this is good news. Disney put their money where their mouth is and most parents have reacted the way they should. They’ve put their kids’ well-being in front of virtue-signaling. Even better news is that because traditional societies like China and most of the third world absolutely abhor this kind of stuff the world-wide box office isn’t going to save this turkey. Disney isn’t even releasing this film in China or other areas of the world. Europe and North America will have to suffice and we already see how that’s going. What a great way for Disney to start off a recession, with a catastrophic box-office disaster.
M-I-C- (see ya later)
K-E-Y (why, because we’re awful)
M-O-U-S-E.
Walt would be so proud!
Disney’s Animatronic Biden Declared Legitimate President by Orlando Crowd
I think it would be a good bet that animatronic Biden would win a debate with Dementia Joe every time. The story says the dummy will be standing next to a table adorned with peach blossoms and aviator glasses. But once he leaves with his secret service detail the animatron will get back to work regaling the public with anecdotes about Corn Pop and exhorting the crowd with his trademark, “come on man!” anytime someone uses flash photography.
The exhibit staff have been trying to find a way to prevent the adjacent animatronic Donald Trump from administering an “atomic wedgie” to the Biden machine. They keep updating the Trump unit’s firmware but somehow it keeps returning to the subroutine. One of the IT reps stated that it was “impossible to explain but still incredibly funny.”
Trump vs the Kevin Hart Oscar Depart MAGA Restart
Dramatis Personae: Robert Iger – (RI); The Ghost of Walt Disney – (GWD); Steven Spielberg – (SS); Robert De Niro – (RD); President Trump – (PT);
Scene 1 – Robert Iger’s Office, Steven Spielberg and Robert DeNiro are sitting facing Iger’s desk.
RI – Look Steve and Bob we’ve got to do something about this Oscar mess. ABC is hosting the Oscars this year and we’re depending on the ratings to get us through the doldrums between the Superbowl and Spring training. And considering the money we’re losing on the ESPN fiasco we need this bad.
SS – Robert, why don’t we have Bob over here do the hosting? Everyone loves him. He’d be great.
RD – Yeah, Robert, I’ll kill it. I can start out with a Trump bash and end up with a #MeToo medley of monsters we’ve purged this year.
RI – Are you insane? We’re trying to expand our base beyond the weirdos and cat ladies. Can’t you try and be human?
SS – Robert, what’s wrong with playing to our base?
RI – Look, other than Marvel superhero movies and cartoons this studio hasn’t made a dime on any of these other pictures in years. We’ve got to start bringing in normal people soon or I’m going to sell off the other business to China and just keep Pixar and Marvel. Now who do we have who can bring in the normies?
SS – How about Tom Hanks?
RD – No good. Back when he was doing Bosom Buddies, he called his co-star a fruit while the camera was rolling. That’s hate speech.
RI – Great Caesar’s Ghost! Doesn’t GLAAD ever take a break?
SS – I’m sorry Robert, Tom was our last straight man that hasn’t been #MeToo’ed.
RI – Alright you two idiots, get out of here. I’ve got to have some quiet so I can think.
Scene 2 – Robert Iger’s bedroom that same night. Iger in his bed alone talking to himself.
RI – What can I do? I’ve tried every actor, singer, politician and intellectual in the country and every one is either compromised or unwilling. What can I do, what can I do.
Suddenly the ghost of Walt Disney appears over Iger’s bed.
GWD – Iger, you idiot, how did such a loser end up running my company?
RI – Is that really you Walt Disney?
GWD – No I’m Tupac Shakur. Of course, it’s me, you idiot. You’ve got a life size picture of me on your office wall. What’s the matter, are you blind?
RI – I just can’t believe you’re really here.
GWD – Well, it’s not as if I had a choice. I can’t let a congenital imbecile like you chloroform my company.
RI – But what can I do? The only man who isn’t afraid of #MeToo is Rosie ODonnell.
GWD – The answer is staring you in the face. (Disney punches Iger between the eyes) And when you wake up you’ll have the answer.
Scene 3 – Host’s Dais at the Dolby Theater for the Oscars. President Trump walks to the microphone to the sound of screams and boos.
PT – Good evening weirdos and losers of Hollywood. I’m here because I’m the only living man in these United States who isn’t afraid of the Outrage Police. So, I’ve been tasked with announcing the nominees and keeping it under four hours.
Well I can do a lot better than that. How about four minutes? All you need to know is that no one who voted for me will see a single one of the pictures you’ve nominated. And I’ll tell you something else. If you don’t start making movies like they did in the last century you’ll be lucky if the Oscars make it to the next decade. My vote is for Deadpool 2. Oh, and DeNiro, you suck. Trump out.
The Incredibles 2 – A Science Fiction & Fantasy Movie Review
The trailer for this movie says it is fourteen years since the original Incredibles debuted. That must be true but because at that time I had neither children nor grandchildren of an age to watch it I missed its appearance altogether. Probably four or five years ago I read that it was probably the only Disney film of recent vintage without a truly ponderous social justice taint so I took it out and liked it. I watched it with the grandkids and they really liked it too. But when I saw the coming attractions for the sequel I was annoyed to find a bunch of blather about Mr. Incredible being relegated to Mr. Mom and Elasti-Girl (Mrs. Incredible) being the heroic superhero who earns the daily bread. And so, it was with a certain amount of trepidation that I took Camera Girl and the two older grandsons to the dying local movie palace to see the film.
Well, my fears were unnecessary. The movie is good. By the necessity of a sequel being somewhat derivative by its very nature Incredibles 2 may not rate as highly by some measures and to some audiences. I found it extremely enjoyable. Aside from any measures of technical or visual excellence the story line is meager as expected for this genre but acceptable, the main characters retain their original charm and the interactions between the family members defines the heart of the movie. It is a celebration of the traditional nuclear family. Mr. Incredible is a 1950s Dad. Elasti-Girl could be Donna Reed and the kids are the usual bundle of sibling rivalry, growing pains and mischief but whenever the chips are down the family pulls together to save the day and each other.
I’ll keep this short. If you have kids or grandkids bring them to this movie. And if you don’t, then go see it yourself. You’ll have a good time. My personal favorite scene in the movie is Mr. Incredible coming to terms with his kid’s “new math” homework. His anguished cry of, “Why would they change math?”, brought back such memories of exactly the same scene in my home that I probably laughed out loud in the theater like an idiot. Maybe there is still some hope for Disney. I mean I doubt it, but at least they didn’t alter the characters. They’re still who they were and still a lot of fun.
Roseanne Barr Loses Her ABC Sitcom for Insulting Valerie Jarrett – The Left Loses Its Mind
I read the Hollywood Reporter article
https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/live-feed/roseanne-canceled-at-abc-racist-tweet-1115412
It said Barr tweeted, “Muslim brotherhood & planet of the apes had a baby=vj.”
The article continued, ‘Barr subsequently apologized: “I apologize to Valerie Jarrett and to all Americans. I am truly sorry for making a bad joke about her politics and her looks. I should have known better. Forgive me — my joke was in bad taste.”’
Wow, I was wrong about Barr she is a badass. And it’s cost her big time. Hey maybe Fox can let her have a show on Friday night after Tim Allen’s show.
But doesn’t this make you think that there’s something in the air. Even Progressives like Roseanne Barr are fed up with the Narrative. Even they’re sick of having to toe a line they don’t respect. Roseanne may walk all this back and pay some price involving selling out blue collar people and she might even get back in the good graces (though I doubt it). But something is definitely starting to happen. Cracks in the dam? We’ll see. But the Overton Window is definitely on the move and ultimately all this goes back to Donald Trump.
28APR2018 – Quote of the Day
There hasn’t been frost in almost a week and the grass is growing, flowers are blooming bees are buzzing, spring, renewal, all that crap. Always loved Debbie Reynold’s voice on this song. Very pretty.
The autumn days grow short and cold
Its Christmas time again
The snows of winter slowly melt
The days grow short and then
He turns the seasons around
And so she changes her gown
Mother Earth and Father Time
How very special are we
For just a moment to be
Part of life’s….eternal….rhyme
Its Christmas time again
The snows of winter slowly melt
The days grow short and then
He turns the seasons around
And so she changes her gown
Mother Earth and Father Time
How very special are we
For just a moment to be
Part of life’s….eternal….rhyme
Robert B. Sherman and Richard M. Sherman lyrics from song “Mother Earth and Father Time,” motion picture Charlotte’s Web (1973)