Tag: Mario Cuomo

Fredo Sleeps with the Fish

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Fredo went against the Family.  No not the Cuomo Crime Family.  He went against the #MeToo family.  So, they took him out on the lake and now he sleeps with the fish.  Don Lemon will now be the sole contestant for the title “Stupidest Human on Television.”  Without Fredo CNN will lose a whole demographic of viewers.  The short attention span viewer will permanently tune CNN out.  They’ll drift away to reality tv or possibly watch shiny spinning objects.  They’ve lost their man.

Seriously, as much as I despise the people who fired him, I’m delighted to hear that the last of the Cuomos are now unemployed.  From Mario to Fredo they have infested New York politics and embarrassed Italian Americans for over fifty years.  To never have to see Fredo’s “deer in the headlights” expression again on the television is a blessing.

Of course, I haven’t considered whether Fredo might find something outside of news.  Maybe something in the entertainment industry.  I know it’s probably beyond him but maybe he could become a rodeo clown.  It’s honest work and his face would be an asset.  He wouldn’t need makeup and I’m sure the bulls and bucking broncs will be fascinated by his dim-witted stare.  Or possibly he could become a carny.  Not one of the barkers.  That’s too skilled.  Maybe he could throw sawdust on the beer barf.  That’s not so hard.  That’s it!  His next gig will be beer barf sawdust guy.  And if he studies hard and applies himself, one day, he could become the cotton candy guy.  Only in America.

Really my only worry is the possibility of a next generation.  Could Andrew and Chris have progeny that might one day show up in the public space?  I tend to think this is unlikely.  Based on the drop off in intelligence between Mario and his sons I assume the next generation will fall right out of the human spectrum and end up with IQ’s in the single digits.  That would put them in a class with planaria and other flatworms.  Even CNN couldn’t employ them.

So, I guess this is it.  Farewell Fredo.  We hardly knew ye.  Or we hardly wanted to know ye.  Or something.

Good riddance.

The Cuomos – A Study in Familial Decay

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Yesterday Tom D asked me on the site if I thought Andrew Cuomo’s excuses about Italians being so emotionally and physically demonstrative that his good-natured affection was being mistaken for sexual harassment.  I assured Tom that Andrew Cuomo was demonstrating that he was a creepy pervert.

I fully concede that old-time Italian Americans were more likely to hug and kiss family members than their Irish American neighbors were likely to in similar circumstances.  But I also assured him that some old man who started groping young women was more than likely to be beaten to a pulp by that girl’s brother or father if he was caught in the neighborhood doing it.  And that’s in the US.  Back in the old country he’d probably get knifed for his trouble.

What I consider Andrew Cuomo to be is a cheap bastard.  Now that he’s divorced, he appears to be trying to avoid remarriage or some other honorable romantic arrangement by hitting on the poor unfortunate women who have to work for this slime ball.  Think about it.  He’s the governor of one of the largest, richest states in the US.  There are probably a hundred thousand women in the state who would willingly entertain the idea of dating this loser.  And in fact, he probably wouldn’t have to spend all that much to do it.  He could pass along most of the costs to the state government accounts he already abuses for various purposes.  But no.  He’s too lazy to even bother looking for women even if it would be like shooting fish in a barrel.  So, he perves around these twenty-something assistants and even police officers hoping that one of them is desperate enough to want to have sex with an old, ugly dirtbag who also happens to be the most powerful man in the state.  The sad part is that it probably worked on some of them, the ones who won’t come forward now out of embarrassment.

And now he tries to claim that all this is just the younger generation mistaking avuncular friendliness for decrepit horniness.  The funny thing is he may get away with it.  The legislature would have to impeach him to get him out of his office.  And maybe the Republicans there may think it’s better to leave him in office and run against him in 2022.  Wouldn’t that be a bizarre twist.

Andrew and Chris (Fredo) Cuomo are pretty sad excuses for public figures.  Their father Mario Cuomo was just another Democrat machine politician.  But he at least could string together a few paragraphs in a way that showed that he was an intelligent man.  His sons seem not to have inherited any of his brains.  Whenever I see Chris Cuomo on television, I get the impression that someone must have been blackmailed or bribed into hiring him.  He has no discernible skills at speaking, thinking or even reading a teleprompter without looking like a deer in the headlights.  Andrew is a little less stupid.  He is savvy enough to suck up to the proper Democrat power brokers when it will do him the most good.  I assume he has been given assistance from his father’s allies and subordinates while moving up the political ladder.  What happens next should be enlightening and possibly entertaining as the MeToo movement and the Democrat Establishment try to pry the governorship away from Andrew without too much gore.  But who knows, Mario may have handed over dossiers on the people Andrew needs to fight.  It may just play out in the court of public opinion where it will do the most damage to Cuomo and the Dems.

So, my verdict is that Creepo and Fredo should be the last generation of Cuomos we’ll have to hear about in the news.  And that’s a relief to Italian Americans across the length and breadth of Former America.

A Night at the Opera

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As the Cuomo Tragicomedy grinds on the only thing that is certain is that by the end the voters of New York will wish they had Andy back as governor.  Not that he is a good governor.  Far from it.  He is a petty vindictive dope.  But compared to what will follow he is Pericles.

And really, I am just tuning in for the laughs.  The first high note will be when the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences takes back Andrew’s Emmy Award.  That will strike at the very heart of who he is.  The loss of legitimacy will probably force him to resign his office.

The second important moment will be when Fredo turns on him.  All of this scandal has been terrifying for Fredo.  He doesn’t really know how to navigate these treacherous straits.  So far, he has gotten by leaning on the fraternal loyalty schtick.  It’s definitely wearing thin and eventually he’ll have to move against Andy.  It will have to involve some flavor of Fredo being the victim of all this dishonesty.  If I thought Fredo was bold enough I’d guess he’d go transgender.  That would completely inoculate him from the contagion of patriarchal guilt.  And who knows, maybe someone will think it up for him.  That would be a great sideshow.  He could even change his last name to Cuoma to literally divorce himself from the masculine gender.  I’m hoping it will work itself out on air on CNN.  Possibly Don Lemon can perform some kind of ritual mounting of Fredo to symbolize the defeat of white straight cis hetero something or other.  Well, whatever they come up with won’t be that funny but still, it’ll be worth a laugh or two.  It’s built into the trade mark Chris Cuomo deer in the headlights look into the camera.  In fact, it’s a family trait.  I remember I was told about the press conference where Andy was asked about the public policy of his administration in sending COVID patients back into the nursing homes to infect the other patients.  When I viewed the video, Andy had that same deer in the headlights look on his face.  I’m not even sure he knew what the policy was.  It just shows that Mario’s sons aren’t all that very bright.

But as I say, what will follow Andy in the Governor’s mansion will make him look like Abraham Lincoln in comparison.  It will be a vindictive woman of color and she will torture everyone in that state until they flee in horror.  It should be marvelous.  I will especially enjoy her torturing her white sisters relentlessly.  I assume they will be the primary subject of her wrath and they will be the ones dispossessed even more vindictively than white men.

I notice that I haven’t even addressed the sexual crimes that Andy has been accused of.  So far, they still pale in comparison to what Groper Joe got away with in the Senate.  We won’t even consider what Bill Clinton got up to as Governor of Arkansas.  Andy kissed a couple of women and I think he touched a woman’s stomach under the pretense of admiring her abs.  And he propositioned a couple of them too.  Well as a Democrat leader of a blue state, these are hanging offenses.  And I couldn’t be happier that they are being used as the icing on the cake for shoving him out of office.  All of these male feminists should have to suffer the consequences of advocating the double standards of modern feminism.  I will relish every moment of his obligatory groveling to the matriarchy.

And finally, what will the future hold for Andy?  Could he actually serve time?  Probably not for the COVID deaths.  That was just the usual stupidity of elected officials.  For that you get kicked out of office.  But could he be locked up for sex crimes?  I think he might!  So, there could be even more fun to come.

O momma mia, momma mia, momma mia let me go!

Andrew Cuomo Gets His Turn in the Barrel

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If you are an old straight white guy, there is an industry that is devoted to portraying you as a monster.  And even if you’re a grandee of the Democrat party, the scion (admittedly a degenerate offspring) of Democrat royalty such as Mario Cuomo, if they can find a woman whose feelings have been offended you are going to get the treatment, the royal treatment.

I don’t think it’s possible for these guys not to know that eventually this will happen.  The last Democrat that I know of who had full immunity was the Lion (or Jackal) of the Senate, Teddy Kennedy.  Old Tedward was able to paw, maul and even murder women with complete impunity.  During his nephew’s rape case there was testimony that a drunken Teddy, sans pantalon (without benefit of pants), was perambulating around the yacht hoping to get an offer.  Ah, the Kennedys.

But Teddy was the last gasp.  Look at Bill Clinton.  He got impeached over a consensual fling.  And even Hollywood moguls can’t depend on the sanctity of the casting couch.  Ask poor Jabba the Weinstein.  I mean really!  Does no one stay bought anymore?  Is there no honor among whores?

So, Randy Andy gets his turn in the barrel.  Reading the list of charges, it’s pretty minor stuff, at least legally.  After all Joe Biden is accused of an act that currently would qualify as actual rape.  Cuomo sexually harassed a woman who worked for him.  In New York State that might have a criminal penalty.  But I’m guessing it’s more of a civil case that could cost him some millions of dollars.

But what it might cost him is his hope of another term as governor.  Based on my sense of how this will work, the next Governor of the Empire State will be a Governess of Color.  This should pay for all kinds of sins and really show the Patriarchy that those butt pinching days of yore are over forever!

My take?

Good.  Let them devour each other to the last man.  The Cuomos have been phonies for the last fifty years that I know of.  Mario, Andrew and even that congenital idiot Fredo (Chris) were and are the worst kind of opportunists.  Democrat party apparatchiks that have followed the party right down the sewer to its current state of woke madness.  And now, finally, it’s going to devour them next.  Well, excuse me if I don’t shed a tear.  I think it’s especially good that all white men and eventually all white women figure out that the Democrat party has only back of the bus seats for them.  And if that works for them then good riddance.  I’m looking to make common cause with people who don’t believe in race-based justice.  I happen to think the Summer of George has given even some left-leaning people an object lesson as to what happens when you summon up a race-war mob.  It becomes very difficult to disband the mob and send it home.  The violence and the consequences of that mob mentality should be easy for people of any race to see as very, very dangerous.

But I digress. Saint Andrew of the Emmys is looking down the barrel of #MeToo defenestration.  And it’s arriving just in time to finish off the damage that the nursing home deaths scandal had already kicked off.  In fact, I believe the #MeToo mob is just another bunch of sharks showing up once there was blood in the water.  Of course, the #MeToo has the advantage that once Cuomo is generally thought of as a “bad man” then convicting him of the real crime, malfeasance in office becomes that much easier.  None of his cronies will be willing to throw a lifeline to the sinner and he will be eaten alive.

So sad, so sad, so very sad.  The only questions I still have are, will Fredo turn on him and will CNN turn on Fredo?  Now that’s must see tv.