The pseudonymous Wayne Isaac has reviewed “The Last Jedi.” Since I brought my grandsons to see “The Force Awakens” I knew I wouldn’t be going to this picture. Suffice it to say that it’s worse than I feared. It turns out the “Force” is actually estrogen and that explains why Jedi Knights are so screwed up. They’re plugged into the wrong power source. Or rather they’re just not equipped to be heroes. Who knew? We’ll have to let Alexander the Great and George Washington know. Boy will they ever feel foolish. Anyway enjoy.
Category: Science Fiction / Fantasy
What is The Trumpocalypse Missing?
I have to assume that from now until at least when Mike Pence inherits the presidency in 2025 there will be at least three crises every week in the Trump Administration. I’m not sure if guys like Bannon are under contract to break out into nuttiness or if it’s just the Call of Cthulhu.
And it used to make me fret. But I’ve long since cut the break cables and learned to enjoy the dizzying corkscrew plunge down the Trump Magical Mystery Hairpin Extravaganza. It truly is the “Greatest Show on Earth.” But this is a slow news week (sort of) so I decided to amuse myself by imagining what is crazier than what is actually unfolding in D.C. every day. What’s missing?
Well, the only thing missing is space invaders like the ones in Independence Day. I mean, why not? Sure, Will Smith and Jeff Goldblum won’t help out Trump but he can get Adam Baldwin and then maybe add on Vince Vaughn. And Trump would be a much better President than Bill Pullman. First off, Trump really is President! Secondly, he wouldn’t be all whiney about using nukes. Why, just this week he was bragging that his nuclear button was bigger than North Korea’s button. So nuking aliens, no problemo. And finally, if a captured alien broke loose and killed our scientists Trump would not be trying to placate it into being our friend. He would very wisely tell Adam Baldwin to shoot it full of holes. Then he would send it back to the aliens in a big bottle of formaldehyde as a warning. Now that’s the way the movie should have gone. And another thing, Melania would be a much better First Lady than the one in Independence Day. If Donald tells her to get out of Los Angeles she won’t hang around and get caught up in the firestorm. In fact, she’ll probably be at home taking care of her young child like a good mother should.
Is there any doubt that Mad Dog Mattis would be a better Secretary of Defense than that loser in the movie? So, the biggest problem is Area 51. I’m guessing if there really were a secret alien spacecraft in Nevada then Obama must have handed it over to the Iranians as part of his surrender treaty. So, we’d have to start from scratch on counterattacking with their own spacecraft. Now Data from Star Trek, TNG wouldn’t be a conservative. Possibly we can get Shatner. He’s a Canadian but I think he’ll take any part he gets paid for. So, it actually makes sense to encourage the President to lure space invaders to Earth. Defeating them will encourage a camaraderie among surviving Americans. Also, let’s face it, only the Americans and possibly the Russians have an air force that would actually defeat space aliens. All those other countries would be essentially wiped out. And as sad as this would be, it would definitely have a positive effect on the American economy.
And finally, if New York, Los Angeles and Washington were essentially wiped out, followed by San Francisco, Boston, Philadelphia and Baltimore, then after the invasion was over it seems possible that California, New York, Massachusetts, Pennsylvania and Maryland might become red states. Now that really would be science fiction (or fantasy).
For you Monster Hunter Intl. Fans, Larry Correia Has Posted Part X of his Annual Christmas Noun Saga
Larry was the guiding spirit behind the original Sad Puppies campaign and the author of the best-selling Monster Hunter International series. He’s also an extremely amusing fellow and his Christmas Noun parody is a yearly institution on his site. The earlier installments are linked there and provide background on the various goofy story conventions involved in the tale. And it’s free. Enjoy.
Vox Day’s SJWs Always Double Down – A Book Review
If you’ve never heard of Vox Day then most probably you haven’t been following science fiction and fantasy over the last few years. This is probably highlighted from the caption at the top of the cover of this book that quotes the Wall Street Journal as saying about Vox that he is, “The Most Despised Man in Science Fiction.” And on one side of a partisan divide that is completely true. But on the other side of that line he is a folk hero or maybe folk-devil.
For those who do not know him suffice it to say that he has been very active in the various campaigns by the alt-right (or some subset of it) against the forces of the SJW converged establishment. He has been active in the campaigns against SJWs in Gamer-Gate, Puppy-Gate, Trump’s Election and lately in his launching of Alt-Hero to counter the SJW convergence of comic books. He’s also an editor of his publishing company Castalia House.
In addition to his science fiction and fantasy books Vox has written several books on the culture wars. To my mind the two most interesting are his “SJWs Always …..” books. Let me clarify. His first of these was the ground-breaking “SJWs Always Lie.” Now he has added “SJWs Always Double Down.” These titles are drawn from Vox’s “Three Laws of SJWs”
- SJWs Always Lie
- SJWs Always Double Down
- SJWs Always Project
The laws succinctly describe the behaviors to expect from SJWs. The books are manuals on how SJWs behave and how you should and shouldn’t react to them. I called the first one ground breaking and that’s no exaggeration. They reveal the direction and progression of SJW encroachment and attack on normal people and normal institutions. It was lavishly filled with examples that Vox drew from his own experiences and from things ripped from the headlines. It was grim but valuable information.
With the publication of the second book, “SJWs Always Double Down,” Vox continues the lessons. Once again, he illustrates his points with anecdotes from his experience and the real world. And he brings us up to date on the latest events in the Gamer-Gate, Puppy Gate, Milo’s tour, the Trump Election saga and now the comic book wars.
For some one who has been involved in some of these events (albeit much more peripherally and much less actively than someone like Vox) I find his insights and background information pretty interesting stuff. But just as with the first book, the more important aspect of the book is as a practical handbook of what to expect from SJW encroachment on every aspect of modern life. Raising awareness of these problems and giving you practical advice and examples of successful tactics is literally priceless.
There may be some parts of this book that you won’t be interested in. For instance, if you do not intend to debate SJWs you may be completely uninterested in the Aristotelian categories of rhetoric and their application in debate. But if you are interested in keeping your job then the information on SJW tactics in the work place will be very interesting.
Full disclosure, Vox is on the far right in his politics and beliefs. His beliefs may be completely incompatible with your own. If that means you cannot read his book then that’s that. But honestly, just because I’m much more of a moderate than Vox Day, I still recognize the validity of the observations he makes about SJWs and many other aspects of today’s various cultural crises. His early recognition of Donald Trump’s viability as a candidate and his amazing abilities as a practical politician indicate that Vox is astute. I believe you ignore his information to your own detriment.
And dammit some of his jokes are comedy gold. Anyone who can see his insertion(!) of “Space Raptor Butt Invasion” into the Hugo Awards as a nomination for Best Short Story and not laugh out loud has a heart of stone.
I say that Vox’s SJW books are a national treasure for all on the right. Highly, highly recommended.
Greg Bear’s Hardfought – A Science Fiction Book Review
Hat tip to Tom (one of our most active site denizens) for recommending this story. I knew of Greg Bear but when he was most popular my reading habit was curtailed due to SYFMS (struggling young family man syndrome). After reading Hardfought I’m looking forward to reading some more of Mr. Bear’s stuff.
Hardfought has a pretty complex structure and several important plot elements are intentionally obscured. This makes the beginning of the story confusing. But hang in there. It builds to a good effect. Because of the structure of the story I can’t go into much detail of the plot without spoiling it. Suffice it to say that this is a very interesting take on human-alien war. I liked the way Bear uses the details of stellar evolution (lack of heavier elements in first generation star populations) to define the contrast between the human and alien characteristics. The human characters appear strange to the reader. Their environment and social structures are very unusual and so it takes a little bit of plot revelation to start to put their behaviors into context. The alien protagonist’s behavior and motivation are intentionally inhuman but his interactions with his own species and with humans highlights several traits that make him useful to the resolution of the story.
The story is a meditation on the consequences of total war or war to extermination. I think it is asking whether survival at any cost actually is surviving. If what is left of you at the end is unrecognizable did you actually survive? And I don’t think Bear is answering the question. He is just illustrating the end of the trajectory. It is obvious to the reader what has been lost but everyone gets to decide if the price is too high.
A very interesting read. I’ll have to look through Bear’s other stuff and see what else I should try. Thanks again Tom.
Equilibrium – A Science Fiction Movie Review
I work with this young guy, he’s fresh out of college, maybe twenty-three-years old. He’s an engineering graduate and is well read and has a good classical grounding in literature and history. Good kid. Sometimes we talk about popular culture stuff. I can remember talking with him about the Matrix and saying there’s good and bad about it. I think I said it would have been better if Reeves weren’t the lead. And I think that’s when he recommended “Equilibrium.” Now I think I know what he was getting at.
So, Equilibrium is set in a dystopian future after World War III has devastated humanity. Mankind has decided that rather than chance another war, the root cause of war must be abolished. If I remember the chain of logic is war is caused by hate. Hate is an emotion. Therefore, eliminate emotion, eliminate war. So everyday every man woman and child self-inject with some kind of emotion deadening drug. And of course, it doesn’t just eliminate hate and anger. Love and happiness are extinguished too. Brilliant. Of course, it’s not explained why exactly they still want to live but whatever.
So just in case this premise isn’t bizarre enough, this society also has some kind of priest-like caste of ninja police whose job it is to hunt down and splatter anyone who doesn’t take his no-feelum medicine. And of course, the Ubermensch of ninjas and protagonist of the movie is Christian Bale. He is the most skilled proponent of the gun kata. This stylized dance-like routine allows him to (somehow) avoid the bullets of apparently any number of gun toting opponents while literally mowing them down like grass. The other mission of these holy stormtroopers is to root out any remaining pre-war artifacts that have emotional content. And once located, apply a flamethrower to these emotional touchstones. So, for instance, during one of Bale’s raids he somehow intuits that under a floor is the actual Mona Lisa. He gives the order and the barbecue crew incinerates Leonardo’s mischievous lady. So, what’s the problem? It turns out there’s a resistance! And it turns out Bale is not as emotionlessly happy as he could be. It seems his wife unbeknownst to him was a secret feeler. When she’s dragged away to be incinerated it seems to have left a mark. And we’re off. The rest of the movie is Bale going from emotionless executioner of the innocent to a guy who can’t let a puppy dog get shot.
Now let’s bring it back to my young co-worker who recommended this movie based on a comment about the Matrix. Well, stylistically this movie is extremely dependent on the Matrix template. Guns and swords abound and the wire work and fight scenes are very Matrix-esque. Even Bale’s priestly cassock is like Neo’s garb in the second and third movies. The emotionless police a level below the ninjas are close to the Matrix agents in appearance and behavior. The Resistance is equivalent to Zion in the Matrix. Without a doubt this movie is a reaction to the success of the Matrix. But interestingly the dystopia is a completely different science fiction catastrophe from the AI revolution and human battery future of the Matrix. What they share is humans fighting to be allowed to be actual humans.
What’s the verdict? Well, it’s derivative in a number of ways but it is well done and Christian Bale is a slightly better actor than Keanu Reeves and there is the puppy dog, so there is that. I don’t know. I’m not a big Matrix fan. So maybe I’m biased. But I can’t say I recommend it unreservedly. I will say if you really liked the Matrix you should give this a try. It has all kinds of hyperkinetic gun and sword battles. So, if that’s a big plus for you it’s definitely something to look at. That’s where I’ll leave this one.
Since my readers don’t always stop by every day I figured I’d paste this poll on each post for a while to see what folks call themselves. This is the post the poll came from Who Are We?
… And that got me thinking. Who are the people who read my blog? I thought it might be fun to see what the cross-section looked like. If you feel like saying what you believe in, feel free to leave a comment and/or pick a label from the poll below. I think it might be interesting.
[Total_Soft_Poll id=”6″]
Hat Tip to Vox Day – Build Your Own Platforms
Vox Day has a very good post that links to a very, very interesting series of articles on Breitbart
Vox is, as most of you probably know, an incredibly polarizing figure on the cultural front. His public face is intentionally as antagonistic and “triggering” to the lefties as it can be. He has staked out a position that thrives on conflict with the left. And he is pointing the direction for a Reconquista of the cultural institutions. To that end he has begun some commercial ventures that take advantage of the space that the left has produced by restricting what kind of books, video games and comic books are “allowable.” His Castalia House publications produces mainstream fiction and some non-fiction that could never be published in the current left-wing publishing establishment. In the last week or so, he has begun a kickstarter campaign to fund comic books that feature some very well-known comic book authors and artists who have been gray-listed by Marvel and DC for not being sufficiently trans-friendly or for actually having fun in their comics. I read that he has already topped $200,000 in funding so I can only imagine that a beginning is being made toward a commercial product. Excellent. Even though I’m not much of a comic book guy, I could see buying a graphic novel or two if the product was interesting enough. Kudos to Vox for making it happen. If you are a comicophile (made up word!) then keep an eye out for his Alt★Hero comics. But even if comic books don’t happen to be your thing, you can only admire someone who is doing something to reverse the scourge of leftist encroachment into all aspects of life.
Bravo Vox. Bravo Breitbart.
Lining up the Climate and Selenology
“Even a man who is pure at heart
And says his prayers by night
May become a wolf when the wolfs bane blooms
and Autumn moon is bright”
This being October and me celebrating all things weird and Halloweenish, I figured I’d share my annual lycanthropic calendar check. I have a small patch of wolfs bane (Aconitum napellus, also known as monkshood) in one of our gardens and most years it’s in full bloom sometime in August. But this year has been a very slow season for some plants owing to all the rain and lack of sunny days and warmth. I went out today and found that the buds on the wolfs bane were just beginning to form true blooms.
Looking at my Lunar Calendar I noted that the Hunter’s Full Moon was October 5th. A full moon is a point of time but reckoners of lunar time assign the three days before and after the actual point as the full moon. Therefore, tonight is the last night of the full moon and the wolfs bane is actually in bloom. Hmmm.
Now here’s the thing. I live next to a wood that contains what is charitably called a pond. It is home to a very annoying and highly vocal Barred Owl and a band of coyotes whose musical stylings would be accurately described as blood chilling. Some nights I sit in bed thinking I’d welcome the good old serenade of urban gunfire, ambulance and police sirens. My point is that, for all I know, there’s a werewolf living out there already. But anyway, if there is a werewolf in the neighborhood tonight is his first and only chance this full moon to terrorize us.
But think of all the pressure on this poor schlub. He’s got to go to work tomorrow and he’s probably watching Sunday Night Football (assuming he’s a democrat which of course all monsters are). And just to complicate things the weather has turned rainy and there are a lot of leaves in the grass. I mean if he’s a suburban lycanthrope and let’s assume he’s getting up there, forty-five or fifty years old, he’s not in the best of shape. Suppose he goes running toward a victim and slips and face plants. Not only is this embarrassing but potentially catastrophic. Suppose he knocks himself out and his erstwhile victim thinks he’s a neighborhood stray and brings him to the vet for treatment. Well in addition to binding his wounds these ministering angels of the animal world are liable to give him a flea bath and neuter him for good measure and put his picture in the Penny Saver adoption section. He wakes up the next morning squeezed into some dog crate in the vets’ office naked and without the family jewels. I mean, that’s not right.
So tonight, I plan to put out a pan of beer (probably a cheap domestic) loaded up with vodka. With any luck, the poor bastard will conk out behind my shed and wake up tomorrow with nothing worse than a hangover and really bad breath. I mean, we’re neighbors. It’s the least I can do.
Forums on Orion’s Cold Fire
I’ve been meaning to set up forums but the technical aspects seemed problematic to a cyberphobe such as myself. But problems with trying to embed photos in the comments gave me the push to start up the forums. Currently the biggest problem is that the edit button for the posts doesn’t work right. So take your time and check twice before publishing posts because otherwise the work around is deleting the post and starting over. I’ve posted some instructions I found on a bbpress site on embedding photos. Hopefully they’re helpful but think of this right now as a work in progress. Your patience is appreciated by management during this difficult transition.
Watching All Three Extended Versions of the Lord of the Rings Movies in One Weekend – Part 2
As I mentioned in Part 1 of this review, it really isn’t advisable to watch all three extended versions back to back. However, that is probably the best way to judge the entire series as a unified work. And that is why I wrote this post. I wanted to judge the entire work.
I’ll start with the things that I think Peter Jackson got wrong. I’ll follow with what he did very well.
The Elves.
As I stated earlier, Galadriel and Celeborn are awful. Some kind of other-worldly or ethereal quality is being portrayed that just comes off as weird. I do not believe it matches the intent of the books at all. In the book, when Galadriel talks to Frodo about taking the Ring she does give him the image of herself amplified to some terrible queen. But at the end she shrinks back down and assumes a normal form and speech pattern.
She lifted up her hand and from the ring that she wore there issued a great light that illuminated her alone and left all else dark. She stood before Frodo seeming now tall beyond measurement, and beautiful beyond enduring, terrible and worshipful. Then she let her hand fall, and the light faded, and suddenly she laughed again, and lo! she was shrunken: a slender elf-woman, clad in simple white, whose gentle voice was soft and sad.
“I pass the test”, she said. “I will diminish, and go into the West and remain Galadriel.”
In the book, in her dealings with Frodo, Galadriel displays a totally normal human personality. In the movie, many of the elves, but Galadriel especially, are these weird non-human things. This is a failing. Galadriel is a major character. Her kinship to Arwen and friendship with Aragorn are important points. If elves are not human in their emotional make-up then the love of Aragorn and Arwen makes very little sense.
Luckily, Legolas is given a human personality. His differences are portrayed as largely super-human physical abilities. His banter with Gimli and his good-natured behavior toward most of the characters strikes the viewer as completely natural and not as some inhuman personality. At most he displays a sort of noblesse oblige. Which considering his greater age is completely reasonable.
The Siege of Minas Tirith
Several problems crop up here. One I’ve mentioned, is the characterization of Denethor. He is portrayed as a base individual. In the scene where Faramir was forced by his father to attack the orc army on the Pelennor Fields we are forced to watch Denethor eat a meal of grape tomatoes and chicken. His inability to keep the food from dribbling onto his chin and the noises he makes eating are obviously meant to give us the impression that he is a slob. His cowardice during the initial attack and Gandalf’s cavalier assault on the Steward’s person is completely at odds with the book. Denethor is a noble and honorable individual. The misfortune to his sons and the disheartening images he has seen in the Palantir have driven him to despair. But he is not the evil character that the movie portrays.
The other major problem of the Siege is the meeting of Gandalf and the Witch King. In the book, they meet at the point where the Gate has been breached with Grond. At this point they are face to face and the Witch King taunts saying that the moment belongs to him. At this point the Horns of the Rohirrim are heard and the duel is interrupted. In the movie, the meeting is not at the gate but during the ongoing retreat upward in the city. And in fact, the Witch King shatters Gandalf’s staff, much the way Gandalf did to Saruman’s staff. This seems to be too much. I could see Gandalf overwhelmed by thousands of orcs and Trolls with the Winged Nazgul providing aerial reinforcement. But if Gandalf the Grey could destroy a Balrog, how could a Ringwraith, even one who was perhaps super-charged with Sauron’s spirit during the attack so easily take him down now that he was Gandalf the White? Seems wrong.
And finally, the scene between Eowyn and the Witch King. The scene is still very, very good. But it should have more exactly followed the book’s lead. It should have been from Merry’s point of view. And Eowyn, should have revealed herself as a woman before the fight and in exactly the words printed. The dramatic force of the scene was perfect in the book. But the scene is still very good.
Frodo and Sam
This is the most difficult fault to describe. Sam for the most part seems fairly close to the intent of the book. He’s a simple village boy caught up in the chaos. Frodo is some kind of invalid from start to finish. It’s not at all apparent why he is a reasonable ring bearer. It seems altogether more reasonable to have given the Ring to Sam. Granted Frodo’s personality is not completely at odds with the portrayal in the book. Frodo is always a problematic personality. But I believe this tendency has been brought much too far. There’s not much more that can be said other than I think it harms that aspect of the story severely.
Alright, I’ve laid the bad stuff on you first. So now I’ll tell you what I did like.
Aragorn
The portrayal of Aragorn is just about perfect. He is a kingly man who also has the common touch. He interacts with the other characters and always improves the scene. He displays humor, mercy, gallantry, wisdom and each when it is needed. All of this and yet he always appears human and in the moment. He isn’t a superman. He’s a hero.
Boromir and Faramir
I believe in the scene where Faramir is remembering the day when Boromir recaptured Osgiliath, I think the movie outdoes the book. Boromir and Faramir are shown as brothers in the best sense of the word. Their good qualities as men and soldiers are on display. We get a scene that defines both characters and their relationship. Unfortunately, this was outside the scope of the book. Kudos to Jackson for inventing it. And here it can be seen how the danger of the ring is thrust on Boromir who, as a man of action is least able to resist it. The type of man who would see it as a solution to the enemy at Gondor’s gate. It is an explanation for why he was both a good man and tempted by the Ring.
And the other great scene for Boromir is of course, his defense of the hobbits against the Uruk-hai. You would have to have a heart of stone not to feel admiration and sorrow watching Boromir battle on as each arrow pierces his body. It is perhaps, the best acting scene anyone gets in the movie. Then his dying speech with Aragorn is equally poignant. He shows his love of his people and nobility toward his rival Aragorn. It’s a fantastic sequence.
The Ride of the Rohirrim
This in my mind is the high point of the movie. When Theoden’s army overlooks the apparent destruction of Minas Tirith and he leads the stirring charge against the enemy’s main force it is electric. And after they break the siege and see the Haradrim and the elephants approaching it is stirring and finally when the Witch King smashes Theoden and Snowmane to the ground we get Eowyn’s moment. I have stated that the book’s portrayal is better. It is. But the movie version is still great. And although Theoden’s farewell to Eowyn isn’t in the book it is still very affecting and natural.
The Black Gate
This scene differs in several particulars from the book. The killing of the Mouth of Sauron is notable but not critical. In general, I would say it was very well done. And in one particular it exceeded the book. Aragorn’s rallying speech to his troops before the battle is stirring. And does not occur in the book. The other effect that the movie added over the book was the sight of Barad-dur in the background and the line of sight to it allowing Sauron to call to Aragorn right before he started the battle charge.
Conclusion
So there is the bad and the good. Over all, any real fan of the Lord of the Rings has to recognize Jackson’s movies as a great achievement that brings most of Tolkien’s wonderful story to life. Maybe someday the story will be done again and improved on. But what we have is a great work and something to be enjoyed.