All the Secrets of the Universe and Some Really Important Stuff Too!
Well, the obnoxious Nikki Haley finally, finally figured it out. She’s been the patsy of the Never-Trump cavalcade of clowns like the Koch Brother (after all if there’s only one left is he still a brother?). Now even she can see that if the only ones who vote for you are Never Trumpers and Democrats, the only places you can win are Vermont and Washington DC where there isn’t anyone else.
Don’t go away mad Nikki. Just go away.
What would Nikki Haley and Joe Scarborough have in common? Well, they’re both in a panic that Americans might re-elect Donald Trump President of the United States of America. Here are their latest statements as headlines in today’s new reports:
Haley: Nominating Trump Means ‘Suicide for Our Country
Scarborough: “How Stupid Would You Have to Be” To Vote for Trump?”
Apparently, we would have to be so stupid that we would be willing to commit suicide by nominating Donald Trump for Republican candidate for President.
Well, thank our lucky stars that we have Nikki Haley and Joe Scarborough, two of the most extreme conservatives out there to alert us to our danger. And that is a relief because suicide is bad. Very bad. After suicide there really isn’t much upside left. Of course, I’m not exactly sure what it looks like when a nation of 273 million people commits suicide all at once.
That’s a lot of corpses. And if we’re all dead who buries the bodies. And it will have to be burial. The cremation of 273 million people would be an awful lot of carbon dioxide released all at once. The Canadians are even more strict than Biden about CO2 so if they’re going to be stuck disposing of their neighbors’ bodies, they’re not going to burn them. So, I guess it’ll be burial. Or maybe composting. That’s kind of green. Maybe they’ll do that.
Now I wonder if the suicide will occur immediately after the Republican Convention nominates him. That’s on July 18th so I had better take my summer vacation before that. And probably around the Fourth of July I’ll probably buy an expensive sports car and a diamond tennis bracelet for Camera Girl. The first payment will come due in August. Hah!
I guess I better start figuring out how I want to commit suicide. I’ve never really given it enough thought. It’s kind of complicated. If I were Canadian (Canada again!) I could get some help from the government. I hear they’re always willing to lend a helping hand when someone wants to off himself.
I read somewhere that if you drink too much water, like ten gallons or so, your electrolyte levels in your blood get too low and your heart will stop. That sounds pretty painless but I’d have to spend my last hours on Earth in the bathroom urinating and that doesn’t sound very dignified.
Maybe pills. Currently I know we have a lot of heartworm medicine for the dogs. Could I do myself in with those? Nah, I’d just end up dewormed.
Maybe I could get like ten COVID vaccine boosters all in one day. That would probably kill anyone. But I don’t like needles.
I have heard of the “death by a thousand cuts.” Hopefully paper cuts count. Over the course of my career around the office I must be in the high nine hundreds by now. I’ll buy myself a ream of really sharp paper and begin playing around with it. I’m bound to reach my goal in a day or two. And as a man who spends a lot of his time writing down words, death by paper seems a fitting end.
I guess all that remains is for me to figure out my epitaph. “He died with his boots on?” “Stranger, go tell the Spartans?” “Tippecanoe and Tyler too?” “Haste makes waste?” “Dammit, I’ll take the garbage out later?” I don’t know. Nothing grabs me.
You know this whole thing is more complicated than I thought. I’m sorry Nikki, Joe. I may have to put off this whole suicide thing for a while. If it’s all the same with you maybe we can nominate Donald Trump and somehow keep breathing for a short while. If you don’t mind. But feel free yourselves to drop dead. I don’t think anyone will really care that much. I know I won’t.
Look, who does Nikki Haley think she’s kidding? Regardless of whether Trump succeeds in fixing our government or not he’s the lone possibility of it. Nikki Haley, at best would be Jeb Bush in a skirt. At worst, she’d be the new Hillary Clinton putting the deplorables in their place. Nope, I’ll take my chances with Trump. At least he hates the same people I do.
DeSantis drops out and endorses Trump. That’s one more step to end this race.
https://www.realclearpolitics.com/video/2024/01/21/ron_desantis_ends_campaign_endorses_trump_.html
South Carolina will be the end of the Republican race with Trump as the last man standing.
If Donald Trump regains the White House this will still be a different country than the one I was born into. That country ceased to exist after 2001. That was when the people who ran this country decided that they had the cover to take over everything in our lives and leave us nothing but the bills. And in 2009 when Obama entered the White House he stood over the corpse of our country and buried it once and for all.
So, whatever happens going forward we live in a different place. But some of the people who made up the Old America are still kicking around. You can tell when Donald Trump scores an enormous win in Iowa. It took 37 minutes to declare Trump the winner. With about 37% of the vote in he’s got 52% of the votes to something like 20% apiece for DeSantis and Haley. People know who’s on their side.
So, you can see the demographic outline of the Old America by the places where Trump is doing well; places like Iowa and the Midwest and the South. And so, we’ll recognize that the Old America is a layer submerged in the new. It’s like a layer of pebbles that is all made of one mineral but then another mineral dissolved in water leaches into the stratum and forms a matrix around the pebbles and encases them in a sediment. We’re still here but in new surroundings, a new reality.
The only question to ask then is what can be made of this new place. Will the elites who drove this replacement manage to destroy us? I suppose that’s what we’ll find out. They’ve done a pretty thorough job of lousing up most of the things that still worked in this country. They croaked about half of the small businesses around the cities during the pandemic they orchestrated. They’ve ignited inflation and made life awful for the working class. They’ve consigned the children of the middle-class to the under-class. And they’ve sent most of the manufacturing jobs to Asia. I won’t even bother with the forever wars because even the Millennials and Zoomers are hopping mad about those because they might be the ones to have to fight them. So, all of this is waiting in the wings to see who gets the White House in November.
And to keep us amused until then we get to watch the spectacle of the Republican donors and the RNC spending tens of millions of dollars to try to convince voters that Nikki Haley is one of them. Not since Hillary Clinton started speaking in tongues and tried to convince black voters that she was just a poor old cotton-picker from Arkansas have we witnessed phonier “aw-shucks, we’re just folks” play acting. Well, I know Nikki said that Hillary was her inspiration and template. I think she’s reached her goal. All she lacks is the cackle.
So, let’s see how these primaries go. New Hampshire is probably going to be Haley’s high-water mark. All the Dems will voter for her since there isn’t going to be a Democrat primary to speak of. It’ll be fun to listen to the various talking heads try to parse this thing and give Nikki all the hopeful coverage they can until Trump reaches the finish line on Super Tuesday, March 5th. That’s seven weeks. Forty-nine days of listening to halfwits explaining how Nikki Haley would bury Joe Biden but Donald Trump doesn’t stand a chance. I’m sure MSNBC, CNN and PBS will have graphs and power point presentations and even holograms to prove all this.
I hope there is plenty of entertainment value to all this. I could use a laugh. In fact, Old America could use a laugh. We haven’t had one in years.
So, I read today that we lost that fat tub of lard, Chris Christie. He finally dropped out. And probably the only reason he dropped out was to give Nikki Haley a better shot at making it close in New Hampshire. Well, if there’s a candidate I dislike more than Chris Christie it’s Nikki Haley. In fact, I despise Haley more than Christie by whole orders of magnitude. Christie is just an annoying gadfly. He’s on an anti-Trump crusade because it’s the only way he could think of to even reach the debate stage.
But Haley is an honest to goodness GOPE RINO. She believes in endless neocon war, unlimited illegal immigration, woke evil like transgender pediatric surgery and anything else that progressive Republicans tell her she should believe in. Listening to her explain why we need to be involved in multiple wars makes my skin crawl.
Currently the plan is for Haley to either win or come close in New Hampshire by means of unaffiliated voters switching their party affiliation to Republican and voting for her. Then when the South Carolina primary rolls around the hope is that she will have generated enough excitement from New Hampshire to win. And you never know. Stranger things have happened.
So, if she manages to win one or both of those states, she hopes to stay in the race all the way to the convention. Well, I tend to doubt she can make much of a showing. But what she’s really hoping is to be the last man standing if Trump gets disqualified by the Republican National Committee and then be appointed the nominee. Basically, she is JEB II. No, I take that back, she is Mitt Romney 2.0. One thing I am sure of. If Haley is on the ballot, she won’t be getting my vote. I’ll either stay home or vote for Biden as a protest vote. I despise her even more than Biden and you know how I feel about him.
So here we have the Republican Party doing everything they can to eliminate the candidate that has been polling over 60% for months. It’s demonstrably clear that they have no interest in adopting any of the clear policy preferences of the great majority of the Republican voters. All they want is to force the generic GOPE candidate on their voters and if they can’t do that they’d prefer to lose.
I understand that in the short term the Republican Party is the vehicle we are forced to vote for to provide the lesser of two evils. But a time has to come soon when a successor party must begin to form around populist candidates who won’t owe allegiance to the donors and lobbyists.
It would be an enormous thrill to have a party where everything it stood for was anathema to the Bushes, the Obamas and the Clintons. Where Nikki Haley, Mike Pence or Chris Christie would be booed off the stage if they dared show their faces. If I could name it maybe I’d call it the Normal People’s Party. Or maybe we could call it the God and Guns Party. Since these are all the things that Barack Obama hated about America.
But in the meantime, just look and listen to Nikki Haley and know exactly what the Republican Party is all about.
The headline reads, “Major GOP donors eye Nikki Haley and Ron DeSantis as the top Trump alternatives.” Farther down it says,
“Mark Harris, the lead strategist at the pro-Haley Stand for America super PAC, released a memo after the debate touting the position of the lone woman in the primary “after two strong debates.” A Haley fundraising appeal on Thursday told supporters she has been “FLOODED with a nonstop SURGE OF SUPPORT,” following the debate.”
So, Nikki Haley is surging. Her support is rising. Well my stomach is surging and churning and my gorge is rising just thinking about her.
You know, I think I’d prefer Joe Biden as president rather than Hikki Haley. It’s hard to imagine but I can’t think of anyone who wouldn’t get my vote over Nikki Haley. Except maybe Barack Obama. He might be a tad worse. Luckily, he’s blocked on constitutional grounds. But even JEB! would be preferable to her. Romney would be close. They have a lot in common. The smug elitist attitude, the tone-deaf position on conservative issues. But I think even Mitt would get my vote instead of Haley.
It’s amazing to think that establishment Republican operatives see Haley as a top choice. But it makes sense. She gives them a candidate that they can package as checking off all the right boxes. Female, check. Non-white, check. Pro-abortion, check. Pro-Ukraine, check. Pro-Gaia, check. Smug elitist attitude, check, check, check. These are the people who gave us John McCain and Mitt Romney for president. They know a cheerful loser when they see one.
So, look, this isn’t shocking or even surprising. The powers that be will select the least authentic, most bought and paid for loser they can find. And that is Nikki Haley through and through. Then, why am I writing about this? Because it makes me crazy knowing that they’ll keep doing this over and over again.
And this is why Donald Trump is the only candidate I can vote for. He’s the protest vote against all of this phony nonsense. Even after W, McCain, Romney, JEB and everything that went on in 2020 they still try to push Nikki Haley as a conservative. It’s enough to make you want to throw up. Because what they’re saying basically is, “Either you’re too stupid to see what we’re doing or too weak to stop us from doing it and we don’t even care which it is.”
And so, if in November 2024 the ballot for president has the name Nikki Haley as the Republican candidate I’ll vote for the Democrat. Even if it’s Joe Biden. Even if it’s Kamala Harris. Heaven help me, even if it’s the stupidest man on planet Earth, Don Lemon, I’ll vote for him.
I’m not voting for their clowns anymore. Bought and sold won’t work. We’ve gotten a look behind the curtain and we’re not likely to forget. So, 2024 can be the beginning of the new world. No one votes for fake conservatives anymore and we abandon federal elections until our choices are credible. No more Mitt Romneys, no more Bushes and definitely no more Nikki Haleys. Boycotting these phonies is precisely what will change things. In the meantime, local politicians will gain in importance and eventually one of them will be the clear choice in presidential elections.
Who knows, maybe a new party will replace the Republicans. The time is past ripe for it. Once the party starts losing every election I could see a massive defection of conservative Republicans to a third party at some point. That would leave the phonies and the grifters like Mitch McConnell and Lindsay Graham high and dry and all alone. I guess they can call up their old friend Nikki Haley and see what she’s up to.