Category: Current Events

Trump vs the Hell Storm (Part 3)

photog Current Events, Humor, Trump , , , , , ,

Trump vs the Hell Storm (Part 2)

 

Dramatis Personae: President Trump – (PT), Vice President Pence – (VPP), Melania Trump – (MT), Jay Leno – (JL)

Scene 1 – Air Force One – Midway between Washington and Los Angeles.  President Trump and Vice President Pence.  Thursday 2pm EDT.

PT – Mike, it’s go time.  The First Lady has left the White House and the Secret Service says she’s going to see a divorce attorney and a really good one too.

VPP – Mr. President, I don’t see what you can do now.  You’ll just have to let events take their course.

PT – No mike, no.  I must win her back.  It would be a crushing blow for the country if I was humiliated in this way.

VPP – Really!  That’s what you’re worried about?

PT – Of course, my oath of office is a sacred duty.  Surely you understand this.

VPP – Ahhh.  Okay sure.  Look Mr. President, my advice doesn’t seem to be working for you.

PT – That’s true Mike.  So far, you’re batting zero.  But you’re very holy and I think you can pull something out of the air for me.  What do you know about holy forgiveness stuff.

VPP – Well, I remember from theology class that in the Middle Ages Holy Roman Emperor Henry IV knelt in the snow for three days to get forgiveness from Pope Gregory VII.

PT – Did it work.

VPP – Yes, it did.

PT – But Melania’s not the Pope.  She’s a million times hotter looking than the Pope.  And that’s not a homophobic thing either, it’s just obvious.  So, I don’t think the snow thing is the right angle.  But I can work with this.  That’s it.  I’ll do an Emperor Henry a la Trump.

VPP – I’m sort of afraid to ask how that would look.

PT – Don’t worry.  I’ve got this whole thing scoped out.  What I need you to do is get the Secret Service to locate these individuals and bring them to Las Vegas.

VPP – Wouldn’t that be kidnapping.

PT – Nonsense they’re all patriotic Americans and will do anything they can to save the country from crippling depression.

VPP – Actually I think these two are Britons.

PT – Close enough.

 

Scene 2 – Same Day 8pm PDT – Las Vegas, Nevada – Main concert hall of the Trump Casino. The stage is filled with television camera equipment and set up as a bad imitation of the old Jay Leno Tonight Show stage.  Sitting in his usual position is Jay Leno (noticeably dressed for auto maintenance) and opposite him on the couch is President Trump in a late 1970s powder blue disco outfit with platform heels and a very large orange afro wig.

JL – And we’re back?  Mr. President, I seem to have been kidnapped by the Secret Service.  Could you please fill me in on why exactly that is?

PT – Jay, that is completely fake news.  You have been enlisted in a very important cause.  We live in a very polarized country and only you Jay Leno have the moral authority necessary to broker an honest deal for me.

JL – Well that’s extremely flattering Mr. President but I’m just a comedian.  I wouldn’t know how to bring the American and North Korean peoples together on the road to peace.  That’s for ambassadors and statesmen.

PT – What are you talking about?  I need you to help me apologize to Mrs. Trump for the porn sex thing.

JL – Oh, sure, sure.  I’ve been in Hollywood and Las Vegas for decades.  That stuff is old hat.

PT – Don’t fool yourself Jay.  At heart Melania is an old-fashioned girl.  She’s gonna need something special to be won back.  I’m pulling out all the stops and I’ll need you on your A-Game.

JL – You can depend on me Mr. President.  True love is the greatest force in the world, I think.  Either that or nitro afterburners.  They’re powerful too.

PT – Focus Jay.  I’m about to perform a miracle not seen since the 11th century, an Emperor Henry.  Just read the cue cards I’ve provided and I’ll do the rest.

JL – And welcome back to this special broadcast of the Jay Leno show coming live to you from beautiful Las Vegas, Nevada.  Apparently, I’m your host tonight Jay Leno and we’ll be talking to President Trump about some pretty important but personal matters.

PT – That’s right Jay.  I, your President, am able to handle any number of impossible tasks flawlessly and simultaneously all while battling the fake news networks and the treasonous actions of the Deep State and the evil Democrats.  But even a man as amazing and wonderful as me sometimes makes a small error.  Now I won’t go into details because they are only important to one person, the First Lady, but because I need this message to reach her wherever she is I’ve activated the Emergency Broadcast Service to pre-empt all other television and reach out to her.

JL – That’s truly frightening Mr. President.

PT – Shut up Jay and read your cards.

JL – Sorry.  So, Mr. President, is there any significance to your outfit?

PT – Yes Jay.  This outfit represents the garb we wore back in 1977.  That is the time when the top song in the country was “Baby Come Back” by Player.  And I’ve assembled the surviving band members and reunited them here to play their classic hit for Mrs. Trump.  And I know once she hears the lyrics and sees my Emperor Henry she’ll realize how important for the country her forgiveness is.

JL – You know, that almost makes sense.

PT – Shut up Jay and introduce the band.

JL – Sorry.  And now coming to you direct from a triumphal comeback tour of Princess Cruise Lines Caribbean Delight Program, here they are “Player.”

(several fairly geriatric musicians begin to play a subdued version of Baby Come Back while President Trump adds his own stylings and some disco moves).

Spending all my nights

All my money going out on the town

 

PT – And that’s a lot of money all right.

 

Doing anything just to get you off of my mind

But when the morning comes

I’m right back where I started again

Trying to forget you is just a waste of time

 

Baby come back, any kind of fool could see

There was something in everything about you

Baby come back, you can blame it all on me

 

PT – That’s right Schmoopey, you can blame it all on me.  I’m strong and can take it.

 

I was wrong, and I just can’t live without you

All day long, wearing a mask of false bravado

Trying to keep up the smile that hides a tear

But as the sun goes down

I get that empty feeling again

How I wish to God that you were here

 

PT – That’s right God wants us back together and he knows best.

 

Baby come back, any kind of fool could see

There was something in everything about you

Baby come back, you can blame it all on me

I was wrong, and I just can’t live without you

Now that I put it all together

Give me the chance to make you see

Have you used up all the love in your heart

Nothing left for me

Ain’t there nothing left for me

 

PT – Very, very little left for me.

 

Baby come back, any kind of fool could see

There was something in everything about you

Baby come back, listen, you can blame it all on me

I was wrong, and I just can’t live without you

I was wrong, and I just can’t live

 

PT – Wrong, very wrong, just can’t live without you Schmoopey.

 

(President Trump returns to the couch as the song ends)

JL – Well I’ll have to say Mr. President, I’ve never seen or heard anything like that in my life.

PT – Yes Jay, love conquers all.

(the phone rings and the First Lady’s voice is heard over a speaker).

MT – Schmoopey, I saw your song and dance.  I know it was from your heart.  Nothing else could explain it.  I feel my love returning.

PT – Schmoopey, I am so happy.  Is all forgiven?

MT – It will be when you send me the Hope Diamond and a picture of the ‘ho with two black eyes.

PT – Done and done.  I’ll have my jeweler and the Secret Service get to work on both those items within the hour.

(the phone call and the television broadcast both finish)

JL – Well Mr. President, that was actually quite impressive.  I guess there isn’t anything that the power of the US government can’t do.

PT – Not really.  I was originally trying to get Elton John to sing “Sorry Seems to Be the Saddest Word,” but he refused.  He was still mad about a crack I made about his hair.

JL – You made a joke about his hair?

PT – Shut up Jay.

29MAR2018 – American Greatness – Article of the Day – Victor Davis Hanson’s The Distortions of Our Unelected Officials

photog Current Events, On-Line Article Reviews, Reviews, Trump , , ,

VDH lists the various members of the Deep State who not only lie under oath but then project their own mendacity onto the Trump Administration. It makes me shake my head and wonder why no action has been taken.

 

The Distortions of Our Unelected Officials

Back to the Future (Make That Back to Heinlein’s Future History)

photog Book Reviews, Current Events, Reviews, Science Fiction / Fantasy, SF&F Book Reviews, Trump , , , , ,

Back in the nineteen-forties and –fifties Robert A Heinlein was writing his “Future History” stories about the time period that currently is the recent past. And on his very impressive chart somewhere between the beginning of space flight and the beginning of a theocratic dictatorship in the United States was a period around the nineteen sixties that he called the “Crazy Years.”  You get a flavor for what he meant in a story called “The Year of the Jackpot.”  In this story social mores were unravelling.  Women would spontaneously strip naked in public without knowing why they were doing it and transvestite men and women would challenge the authorities with prosecution for daring to notice that they were queer.  Whether Heinlein was truly prescient or whether he just detected the beginnings of the curve and extrapolated it to its outlandish extreme is unknown to me.  But obviously he was being cautious.  No kidding, the current events that greet each of us as we survey the contents of our daily purveyor of fake news is well beyond what would have passed for science fiction or parody a few decades ago.  States are suing the federal government to prevent it from ascertaining if a census form is being filled out by an illegal alien.  A “woman” who used to be a man is marrying “man” who used to be a woman and we are supposed to believe that somehow now a man will be giving birth to the child.  A porn actor is suing the President’s lawyer for defamation of character.  Does a porn actor even have a character that can be defamed?  We’ve been laughing at these insanities for decades but none of it has gone away or even slowed the march to the brink of insanity.  Heinlein’s theocratic dictatorship is looking less and less like a nightmare scenario and more and more like a really good idea.  I’m really starting to wonder how much worse Sharia Law would be than the current politically correct straight jacket we currently endure.  At least under it there are easily recognizable roles for the traditional individuals most of us remember as normal.

 

Heinlein later in his career wrote a sort of spy novel with a female replicant heroine called “Friday.” In that universe the United States and Canada had balkanized into a number of smaller states.  Some of the states mentioned are Brit-Can, Quebec, the Alaska Free State, the California Confederacy, the Republic of Texas, the Vegas Free State and the Chicago Imperium.  This later novel is significantly less optimistic than his earlier works.  I definitely don’t claim that Robert Heinlein was particularly more skilled as a prognosticator than any other seers around but I begin to see a rationale for separating from behavior that keeps trending not only farther and farther from normalcy but even begins closing in on suicidal.  I still hope that the path forward is the majority of Americans rejecting the progressivist nightmare that is currently unfolding and at the least restore the conditions needed to allow a functional society.  But I have to admit I’m starting to worry that the Alt-Right may not be just making up their apocalypse.  I better get my passport stamped for the Republic of Texas, or should that be the Vegas Free State?

Trump vs the Hell Storm (Part 2)

photog Humor, Trump , , , , , ,

Trump vs the Hell Storm (Part 1)

 

Dramatis Personae:  President Trump – (PT); Vice President Pence – (VPP);

Scene 1: Trump Tower, Executive Suite.  Monday 1pm.  President Trump and Vice President Pence face to face around a small round office table.  The table is littered with coffee cups and crumpled legal paper.

PT – Also no good?  Alright, how about this one?  Ten years ago, Putin knew that I was destined to be President.  So, in order to destroy me he drugged me with Spanish fly and brainwashed me into sleeping with Stormy Daniels.  It makes sense, right?  It’s some form of Russian collusion and in a way my brain which is like a computer was hacked by Putin.

VPP – Stop!  Enough!  I’m sorry Mr. President but that’s enough.  I can’t listen to even one more of these insane lies.  I know you’re desperate but there isn’t one chance in a trillion that anyone, and I mean anyone would believe any of those stories.

PT – But then what can I do?

VPP – I know it’s a little late in the game but have you thought of the truth and an apology?

PT – Mike, that’s a brilliant idea.  Why didn’t I think of that?  Anyway, I’m going home right now and put your brilliant strategy into effect.  Who knows?  If this goes well I might even start telling the truth to Congress.

VPP – Mr. President, please take some time before you speak to her and try to understand her feelings about what you will be telling her.  This will be a devastating conversation and you must be sensitive to her emotions and let her sense your sadness and contrition.

PT- Look Mike you came up with a good idea but don’t get all Dr. Phil on me.  I think I know a thing or two about the ladies if you know what I mean.  I’ll pour on the Trump charm and prove just how large my hands really are if you catch my drift.  See ya Mike.  (exits the room.)

VPP – Great Caesar’s Ghost.  She’s going to murder him.

 

Scene 2 – Tuesday morning 3am outside the Vice Presidential Residence.  Two men supporting a third man between them.  The third man shakily ringing the doorbell.

VPP – (voice speaking over the intercom)  Is that you Mr. President?

PT – Help me Mike.  Please help me.

VPP – I’m buzzing you in. (the lock buzzes open).

 

Scene 3 – The Vice-Presidential Parlor.  President Trump is slumped back on a chaise longue.  He has several small bandages over cuts on his face, a noticeable black eye and a bag of ice sitting on his groin.  The Secret Service agents appear embarrassed and Vice President Pence is standing nervously fiddling with his robe belt looking down on the President.

PT – You set me up Mike.  I went into the lion’s den like some kind of roman martyr.  I told her the truth and told her Stormy was over-rated as far as the sex went and that I’d make it up to her in the sack and that she didn’t look bad at all for her age.

VPP – Oh good grief.

PT – You have no idea.  She went for the family jewels again so I curled up in a fetal position like they tell you to do with bears.  But she was ready for that.  She worked the face and and kidneys.  She must have studied MMA or jiu-jitsu at some point.  It took six Secret Service agents to get me out of there alive and two of them are at Walter Reed.  One of them probably isn’t going to pull through.

VPP – Mr. President, I’m sure you’re exaggerating.

PT – Have you ever known me to exaggerate?

VPP – Never mind.  How would you like me to help you?

PT – Well after that lousy advice I need you to redeem yourself and come up with an idea to fix this mess you’ve gotten me into.

VPP – (some strangled muffled sounds come from the Vice President’s throat and then there is quiet).  Certainly Mr. President.  I’ll attempt to provide you with better advice.  Is there anything else I can do for you this morning?

PT – Yeah Mike.  Can you get Mrs. Pence to make us some more eggs?  This experience has been extremely taxing.

(more strangled sounds come from Pence and he leaves).

PT – He’s a great guy when he’s on his game.  Alright guys help me into the dining room.

The ZMan Counsels the Zombies of the Right

photog Current Events, On-Line Article Reviews, Reviews , , , , , ,

The ZMan has a very interesting post, “Day Walkers.” He makes an analogy between the Alt-Right and the zombie-vampires in I Am Legion.  He equates right wing speakers going on campus to vampires attacking humans in the daylight, basically a vampire suicide scenario.  I haven’t had a chance to think this whole analogy out completely but I definitely see what he is talking about and it is worth thinking about.

http://thezman.com/wordpress/?p=13324

Trump vs the Hell Storm (Part 1)

photog Current Events, Humor, Trump , , ,

Dramatis Personae – President Trump – (PT);  Vice President Pence (VPP);

Scene 1 – Front Entrance to the Vice-Presidential Residence Monday, 3 am.  Three figures standing in the shadows.  The middle figure rings the door-bell.

VPP – (His loud, angry voice coming out of the front door intercom) – Who’s ringing this bell at this hour.  I’ll have the Secret Service down there to arrest you, you crazy fool.

PT – (The middle figure now whispering into the intercom) – Shhhhh Mike!  It’s me and I’m here with the Secret Service.  Now let us in!

Scene 2 – Immediately afterward in the front foyer of the VP Residence.  President Trump and Vice President Pence facing each other with four Secret Service Agent forming a perimeter around them.  Both VPP and PT are in pajamas and robes.

VPP – Mr. President, has there been an attack or a disaster.

PT – Both.  Mrs. Trump watched the Stormy Daniels show on tv and attacked me.  It was a disaster.

VPP – But why are you here at this unnatural hour.

PT – Well I couldn’t stay there.  She keeps taking shots at the family jewels.  That body armor I’m wearing doesn’t do a damn thing for groin shots.

VPP – But what can I do about that?

PT – Mike I need to use your guest bedroom for a while.  And I need you help.  She’s really mad!

VPP – Mr President, it’s just that Mrs. Pence is not one of your bigger fans.  She thinks you’re a bad influence.

PT – Boy, that seems judgmental.  I mean, I never said anything bad about her.  Well I can be the bigger man.  But look Mike, you owe me this.  If it wasn’t for me you wouldn’t be the second most powerful man in the world.  You’d still be the governor of Oklahoma.

VPP – Indiana.  For Pete’s sake I was the governor of Indiana.

PT – Indiana, right, right that’s right.  Sorry, yes.  But come on Mike, you gotta help me out.  I need some time to figure out a plan.  Maybe a present or a vacation.  Something to give her a chance to cool down.

VPP – Alright Mr. President.  Come on in.  The Secret Service will set you up in the guest room.  I’ll see you at breakfast.  Good night.

PT – Thanks Mike.  I’ll never forget you for this.  Good night.

Scene 3 – Vice Presidential Residence Dining Room, 9 am, same personnel.

PT –  Boy, Mike, the eggs are pretty crummy here.

VPP – I don’t know Mr. President, I’ve always thought MY WIFE makes a very nice breakfast!  And by the way, my wife is still talking to me.  If you get my meaning.

PT – That’s what I said.  These eggs are really YUMMY!  That’s right I said yummy.

VPP – That’s what I hoped you said.

PT – And what a lovely woman Mrs. Pence is.  I’ve always thought she was the best.  Yes sir, I did.

VPP – Thank you sir.  Now what is your plan?

PT – Well, I tossed and turned all night and came up with three different plans.  I’ll present them and you tell me which one sounds best.

VPP – Very good sir.

PT – Okay.  So my first idea is amnesia.

VPP – Amnesia?

PT – Amnesia, yeah.

VPP – But how?

PT – Whaddya mean?

VPP – Well how did you get amnesia and how did it end up causing you to have sex with a porn actress?

PT – Well, it could have happened in any number of ways.  Do I have to spell it out for you?

VPP – I don’t think it’s me you’re going to have to spell it out to.  But if you really propose using an amnesia defense I think there better be more than just the word amnesia.

PT – Fine.  Ahhhhhh, so something like this.  I was walking down Park Avenue near Trump Tower when a small child came out of nowhere and ran into traffic.  I hurtled over pedestrians and snatched up the infant out of the street just as a taxi was streaking by.  I leaped back to curb and deposited the newborn in its mother’s arms.  But by a horrible stroke of bad luck a brick broke loose from the building façade and struck me on the head.  My thick vibrant head of hair blunted the death blow but I was rendered amnesiac.  I forgot that I was currently married and just at that moment a passing bus with a Victoria’s Secret ad caught my eye.  And the rest was fate.

VPP – Vibrant?

PT – Too much detail?

To Be Continued

 

Trump vs the Hell Storm (Part 2)

Peak Civilization

photog Current Events , , , , , , ,

Hat tip to Vox Day as he links to and quotes a very interesting article about the decline and fall of the Roman Empire by one of its modern descendants, an Italian chemist named Ugo Bardi.  Vox is referencing in his title the science fiction story “A Canticle for Leibowitz” where a future world forms monasteries to preserve knowledge through a new fictional Dark Age as the analogy of us recognizing the coming Dark Ages after ours.  Which also hearkens to Rod Dreher’s book “The Benedict Option: A Strategy for Christians in a Post-Christian Nation,” where he compares the present societal decay with the post Roman age that sparked the monastic age.  Bardi in his article goes into the extant texts of Romans from the beginning of the Roman crisis under Marcus Aurelius all the way to end of the Empire in the Fifth Century to argue that the Romans never figured out either what was happening to them or that the Empire could end.

I’ve been fascinated by the spectacle of the Roman Empire since I was a schoolboy hearing about Rome from my Catholic grammar school nuns.  Thinking that we are in an analogous situation is equally fascinating and depressing.  But maybe there is still time to avert such a collapse.  Vox thinks it’s probably too late for the US.  I try to be more optimistic.  If you find the current societal situation at all analogous to that other example of civilizational collapse then you might be interested in looking at both posts.

In Trump We Trust?

photog Current Events, Trump , , , , ,

Back in 2015 Vox Day identified Donald Trump as the best candidate for president.  He understood how Trump would handle the republican field and how he would connect with the American people.  Between Vox and Scott Adams I read about how a NYC billionaire was going to win Pennsylvania for the republicans for the first time since 1990s.  And they were right.  And eventually everyone found out they were right.  And the right wing rejoiced.

But believing in Donald Trump seems to be difficult for many people.  They expect a traditional politician and he’s anything but that.  And they doubt his conservative bona fides.  And it’s easy to understand.  If you’re a dyed in the wool Second Amendment advocate then the bump stock sacrifice may seem an unforgivable sin.  Or if you are a fiscal conservative the budget deal probably looks like an abomination.

But what you have to remember is that in a war sometimes tactics allow you to survive to fulfill your strategic goals.  President Trump is adept at dealing with bad optics.  He knows when to deflect and when to distract and he knows when a tactical retreat may be needed.  Basically, he knew that the gun control furor required a gesture.  He provided one.  But it’s a small retreat if it deflects the main assault.  And in the long run the Supreme Court (if appointed by someone like Trump) could find the bump stock provision unconstitutional anyway.

Right now, plenty of people on the right are throwing in the towel and declaring the end of the Trump presidency.  I guess I understand their low morale.  They’ve been conditioned by the entire post-Reagan republican experience to expect failure.  But what they don’t understand is they will never have a better chance of actually reversing some of the damage that thirty years of liberals has already done.

So now Vox is naming names for the record ( http://voxday.blogspot.com/2018/03/woe-is-us.html ) and asking that the record be kept.  And once again, I agree with him.  In Trump We Trust.  He may be defeated by the Deep State and drowned trying to drain the swamp.  But at least he’ll go down swinging.  So good for you Vox Day and long live the God Emperor, Donald Trump.  And here’s hoping the faint of heart may soon recover their hope.  Because Trump is our last best hope.

American Greatness – Pick of the Day – Total Political War by Matthew J. Peterson

photog Current Events, On-Line Article Reviews, Reviews, Trump , , , , , , , ,

Peterson is part of the Claremont Institute and they seem to be the most perceptive pundits out there.  

“Eight years ago, Claremont Institute Senior Fellow Angelo Codevilla called it the “Ruling Class,” a popular thesis which he turned into a book (The Ruling Class) and used deftly to explain the 2016 election and its aftermath. Michael Anton, in perhaps the most significant essay of the election, called it the “Davoisie oligarchy,” or the “Davos class” and recently coined the word the “oligogues” to describe the majority of elites in their camp that flatter and support them.”

Peterson hits all the high points and identifies what is really going on.  The deep state is rejecting the people’s choice for President because he is an outsider and because they think they can. 

Definitely a good read.

Total Political War