Tag: cannibalism

Import – Export

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I open up Word and stare at the white space and wonder, “What the hell can I write at midnight?” But there is always something to say (or write, or whatever I do) and I might as well find out what is lurking in my subconscious. The news is all over the place

Today there was a shooting on the NYC subway. Someone was shot in the head. Now this is just days after the wholly useless Governess of New York State Kathy Hochul sent the National Guard into the subway to stop the homeless from assaulting and murdering the straphangers. So, my first thought was, did a National Guardsman shoot a perp? I thought, “Nah. They probably weren’t given bullets.” Then I thought, “Maybe one of the gangbangers shot a Guardsman!” Now that seemed much more likely.
But honestly when all is said and done it was probably just gangs shooting at each other. So, all’s right with the world. Or, mission accomplished or whatever. After all, Haiti has just lowered the bar for everyone in the Western Hemisphere. If your gangsters aren’t butchering, roasting and eating their rivals then all you’re dealing with are “first world problems.” And in fact, just to show Haiti that the challenge has been accepted, Mayor Adams of New York proudly claimed that New York City is considered the Port au Prince of America. Now that’s remarkable. Port au Prince has always been a paragon of dysfunction. Back in Hait’s glory days in the 1970s there were two thriving industries that went on in Port au Prince. They had a brisk export business in medical cadavers and human blood.
Now considering that Haiti had a real problem with AIDS I’m guessing the blood business went bust. I’m guessing the cadavers were also impacted by the AIDS problem. After all, how many future doctors wanting to be dipping their hands in AIDS virus? So that’s probably why things have gone awry down in the New York City of the Caribbean. But now that powerful anti-viral drugs are all the rage, I think it’s time for all this discriminatory behavior by Americans to end and restore the trade lifeline that Haiti needs so badly.
That’s right. Haiti can now offer a new product line. Instead of medical cadavers they can provide a better option for all of those dearly departed that are cluttering up the streets of Port au Prince. Haitian Strongman Jimmy Chérizier, can bring his culinary skills to the fore and share his barbecue recipes with the right businessmen and begin exporting a whole line of smoked and cured Haitians to the US.
I mean can’t you just see it? Of course, everything will be most tastefully and delicately handled. Nothing recognizably human will be seen. No heads or hands or feet. Just meat on the bone or fillet. Why, what a perfect way for Americans to support Haiti in its hour of need. And some entrepreneurial Haitians could even emigrate up to New York and open up some barbecue joints in Manhattan. And if supply of prime Haitian runs low, I’m sure the subway shooters could provide some Northern barbecue meat in the meantime.
I always joked about cannibalism breaking out in America. I guess I was just slightly ahead of my time.
There. There’s my post.

Cannibalism Returns to the Western Hemisphere

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Regular readers of this site know that the appearance of cannibalism is my benchmark for declaring the onset of the apocalypse in the United States.  Well, we’re not quite there yet but it has broken out in Haiti which is only about a hundred miles from Florida.

“It is now thought that 80 percent of the Haitian capital is controlled by these gangs.

Describing the violence in the country, a journalist on the ground told Daily Express US that cannibalism has been witnessed on the streets as the violence reaches “unprecedented” levels.

Speaking anonymously, they said: “Haiti is living in a total chaotic situation right now. It is total chaos everywhere, especially in the capital where I am right now.”

Well, well.  I seem a lot less crazy now!  The fact that the most powerful of the gang leaders is nicknamed “Barbecue” tells you everything you need to know about the future of Haiti.  Even around here keep an eye on anyone who gets large deliveries from companies with the letters BBQ anywhere in their names.

28NOV2021 – OCF Update – This’N’That

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Good morning my fellow normal people.  Welcome to another day of figuring out how to navigate Crazyland.  I looked through the articles this morning.  Same old, same old.  You know, things like Dementia Joe can’t figure out how gas prices went up and he’s asking the Justice Department to pummel the Law of Supply and Demand into submission.  Brilliant stuff like that.

I read an impassioned defense of woke-ism by some idiot who was re-animating slavery for the millionth time to justify anti-white racism.  So here we are a hundred and fifty plus years after slavery and somehow it’s still busy oppressing people left and right.

Alright, so let’s look at slavery.  Well, slavery is really bad.  So we had slavery here.  We don’t anymore but, yes we had slavery.  But you know what’s worse than slavery?  Cannibalism.  And you know where cannibalism was (and to some extent is) a real thing?  Africa.  All the way up to the present day cannibalism existed there.  Back in the 1800’s if two tribes had a war, the winners collected up the dead and the wounded and butchered them for lunch.

And there was plenty of slavery in Africa but when someone wasn’t that useful for work he went in the pot.  So if you were someone who was captured as a prisoner after a war and you had a choice between being sent on a hellish slave ship to a distant land to work your life away as a slave or have your throat cut and end up as stew which would you pick?

It’s a fair question.  I’m not sure what I’d do.  But these weren’t choices.  They were just the fortunes of war.  If the Arabs were offering a price for slaves that was above the market price for meat then the prisoners went on the boat.  If not they went in the pot.

The remarkable thing is we decided slavery was wrong on our own.  I think that alone is reason enough for all this woke nonsense to be refuted.  Comparing its track record to that of any other civilization that we know of, the Western world has been remarkably generous with other peoples.  The Arabs and the Turks kept slaves.  It never occurred to them to free them as a matter of moral duty.

Anyway it’s something to think about when the wokesters start yammering about slavery.  Of course I am waiting for cannibalism to emerge here.  I figure California or New York are the most likely places but who knows?  Maybe some artisanal entrepreneur right here in Dunwich could get the thing going.  They’ll probably put out a full-color magazine, well at least an e-zine, and maybe a cable show.  It really makes you think, doesn’t it.

I’m still suffering from the Omicron Variant.  I’m presently using a home-made ventilator to keep me alive.  It makes typing difficult but what can you do?  I went through the patent for Ivermectin and hope to whip up a batch after lunch but, once again, ventilator in the way.  The sun’s not out today so it’s pretty dreary here at the Compound.  In less than a month the winter Solstice will occur I’ll have to build the stone altar and sacrifice a shoggoth or a werewolf or maybe an ear of corn (inflation) at the appointed hour when the portal opens in the sky and Azathoth and the blind idiot pipers materialize in our space-time.  After they gorge themselves on the sacrifice, I’ll invite them in for a glass of eggnog and talk about what they’re planning for Christmas.  I hear Cthulhu already has his lights up and is inviting folks over to see them.  Considering his track record on eating guests, I think I’ll just wait till he puts up a photo on his site.

So I’ll have to be cured of this wretched virus by then or I’ll catch my death of cold outside.  I wonder what they’ll name the variants after they get up to Omega?  Anyway, I should have something interesting to write about later today.  Have a nice day.

Tamping Down the Rioting in MN?

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It almost seems like the Mayor of Minneapolis and the Governor of Minnesota read my post yesterday and pulled themselves back from the precipice of being served up as some kind of mushy, bland Democrat stew meat.  Have I served the greater good by showing them their likely fate as a cannibal entre?  Not in my opinion.

Both the Governor of Minnesota and the Mayor of Minneapolis have taken steps in the last day to curtail the rioting that has erupted in the Minneapolis suburbs after the shooting death of a black man by the police.  A police chief in the city of Brooklyn Center where the shooting took place actually resisted the mob that was surrounding the police headquarters there and when scolded by a reporter for calling the riot a riot replied that he was there and that the rioters were assaulting his men with bricks and other dangerous projectiles.  And he has arrested some of the rioters.  The Governor called up the National Guard and the Mayor of Minneapolis has declared a curfew.

It appears that they intend to avoid last summer’s rolling riot environment.  It should be interesting to see what comes of it.  Will the police be allowed to do their jobs or will it completely unravel?  It’s a fair question.  Now that they’ve taken steps to control the unrest it could subside at least until the Chauvin verdict is reached.  If Chauvin is acquitted of all charges, I expect that the feds will nuke Minneapolis out of solidarity with the rioters.  But even if Chauvin is found guilty of all charges there will still be a riot unless the punishment includes him being drawn and quartered.

It’s been a little less than a year since the 2020 riots.  It may be that Antifa/BLM “leaders” will heed the begging that must be going on from Dementia Joe and his running dog lackeys.  Gee, I hope not.  I prefer my own glimpse into the apocalyptic future.  I dream of Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer being added into the pot of Democrat goulash that would result from a full meltdown of the 51st State if the wrong steps are taken by the Congress during some critical period like Juneteenth or NBA Draft week.  Difficult culinary decisions will have to be made.  It’s obvious to anyone whose followed the House of Representatives that Pelosi is way too stringy to be useful in a normal meat entre.  Maybe if some kind of pulled pork recipe could be modified and lots of hot sauce is added to mask the disagreeable flavor of carrion, then possibly Pelosi meat could be added as a filler.  Schumer on the other hand is completely unusable.  The bitterness and mushy texture would render anything he was added to, inedible.  On the other hand, Romney burgers would be pretty good.  A little bland for sure but very usable.  But the stand out on the menu would be Liz Cheney rump roast.  Let’s face it, Liz would see her finest hour as barbecue for the neighbors there around the Capitol.

Update:  The police officer who fired the shot and the police chief who tried to stop the rioting last night have both resigned.  It looks like the rioting will ramp up from here on in.

This Year’s Antifa-BLM Agenda – A Modest Proposal

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Last year we were privileged to witness the Antifa/BLM riots.  Every day on our screens we could watch as thugs with room temperature IQs assaulted hard working Americans then looted and burned down their businesses.  And while watching it we were instructed by the cable news networks about how lucky we were that justice was finally catching up with our racist white selves.  Good times.

Well, now that it’s warm enough to leave their parents’ basements it’s time to start the burning down the cities again.  But as an entertainment critic I must say I hope they don’t expect their audience to be satisfied with that same old riot, loot and burn schtick.  Come on! That’s so 2020.  We want more.

To get people’s attention in this post-Trump era we’re going to need our thugs to step up, lean in, throw down, whatever.  My thought is a show trial of their own.  Why not round up the Mayor and City Council of Minneapolis and the Governor of Minnesota along with some corporate executives from local companies like Target and United Health Group and try them for the crime of whiteness.  I doubt that these individuals will even try to avoid their trial.  And they will fall all over themselves to admit to their crimes.  They’ll publicly grovel and weep.  They might even soil themselves as they self-flagellate over their guilt and infamy.  If you insist, they’ll even admit they personally ran slave ships from Africa.  Sure, time machines, whatever.

And after the verdict is handed down which of course would be guilty of whiteness in the first degree then start with the beheadings.  I would begin with the Governor and the Mayor.  They’re both men so beheading them won’t garner much sympathy.  Then go for the CEOs of the corporations next and follow up with the City Council.  Now I know there’s a transgender woman on the City Council so that could be kind of ticklish, especially if she’s a person of color but really, I don’t think playing favorites is a good idea.  After all whiteness is not just a skin color thing.  It’s a state of mind and City Council is an institution that probably oppresses people in all kinds of ways so off with her head.  As far as beheading protocol, I’d go with the Al Qaeda standard.  Basically, orange jump suit, hands bound behind back and hack job with dull rusty hunting knife.  It’s a classic that just plain works for the audience.

Now after the beheadings and some end zone dancing with the severed heads I think things become a little less circumscribed.  Stodgy decorum would suggest that the bodies, including the heads, should be returned to the families for religious ceremony and burial.  Even Robespierre and his crew gave the bodies back to the families.  But I don’t know, why not have some fun?  Get a really big pot, throw the bodies into it and cook them with some vegetables.  Maybe a gumbo or something.  Since this is a BLM co-sponsored event, they could consult with Idi Amin’s living relatives and get some of his favorite cannibal recipes.  This will help make the connection to the 1619 Project.  I’m not implying that the white presenting allies from Antifa should be excluded from the feast.  Of course, the vegans might not be interested but I’m sure many others will partake to show their solidarity and also to signal their commitment to recycling.

And once this first trial/feast is completed it could be the template for a whole season of social justice feasts.  The Minnesota event could be termed a smorgasbord because of the Scandinavian heritage of the Great Lakes region.  But when the proceedings reach Boston, it could be billed as a clambake or potluck.  Just imagine all the fun that could go into the regional preparations and presentation.  Marvelous, marvelous.

So, come on street thugs put you heads together and make this leadoff year of the Biden administration something special.  Mine are only suggestions Dig deep and wow us with your ingenuity and audacity.  Your audience expects it.